time to make a post on tumblr. surely no one will interpret it to be as offensive and bad intentioned as possible.
by talos this cant be happening
Today's Document
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
No title available
noise dept.
RMH
🪼

oozey mess
Xuebing Du
Misplaced Lens Cap

izzy's playlists!
sheepfilms
cherry valley forever
Three Goblin Art
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
Stranger Things

pixel skylines

JVL

#extradirty
Claire Keane
seen from Colombia

seen from Poland
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
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seen from United States

seen from Canada
seen from China
seen from United States
seen from Norway

seen from United States
@flickering-leaves
time to make a post on tumblr. surely no one will interpret it to be as offensive and bad intentioned as possible.
by talos this cant be happening
Opera plot: Local Noble realizes that his affections for Pretty Village Girl have a rival in the form of Honest Laborer. Having read enough romances to know that a girl asked to choose between a rich man and a poor man will always pick the poor man, whereas in a love triangle between two rich men it's anyone's game, he decides that his chief object must be to elevate his rival's wealth and status as quickly as possible. What the Compte de Genre-Savie over here forgot to account for, however, was the overwhelming power of the Pygmalion Effect, and now he has to deal with watching two people he's in love with develop ever-stronger feelings for each other. Eventually all of this resolves via...I don't know.
#first of all: ''comte de genre-savie'' is PERFECT. just great. absolutely no notes.#I would love an opera with this exact plot. bonus points if the comte is genuinely genre savvy#he keeps bringing up opera tropes only for the other characters to look at him like he's insane.#the score is diagetic to him; when he points out reoccurring themes or transitions to minor keys#the other characters ask him what the hell he's talking about. the whole chorus gets together to sing about how#comte de genre-savie is going mad. the comte tries to sneak away and keeps getting pulled back in.#I wonder if you could even push it further - have it so that only the comte can speak or 'hear' spoken words;#all other characters communicate in recitativo secco or formally composed songs#then you can have scenes where the comte is speaking but the other character in the scene can't hear him.#this can be played for laughs (the comte tries to order something from a shopkeeper; the shopkeeper walks away as he's talking)#and for dramatic effect (the Honest Laborer is singing a heartfelt duet with the Pretty Village Girl#and neither of them can hear the comte saying 'I love you' in between their lines)#........I am into this actually. I had to convince myself that this wasn't just cyrano de bergerac but no. it isn't. I'm into it.#upon the stage (via @notbecauseofvictories)
The curtain opens on a bucolic pastoral scene with dozens of laborers working in the fields to bring in the harvest (half the chorus and all the subsidiary characters). They sing about the benefits of hard work and the simple joys of farming. Enter Honest Laborer (HL), who is most likely a tenor, stage right, with the rest of the chorus. They have been working another set of fields and have come to help with this last one to complete the harvest. Once the harvest is complete the festival can begin they all sing. Everyone troops out, work complete at the end of the song. This leaves HL alone on stage to sing an aria introducing himself as the Hero (tm) and all about the object of his (and every other guy in town) affections, the innkeeper’s beautiful daughter (IBD). He thinks she might favor him and he sees the festival as a great time to declare his love. He exits to go prepare.
Enter older gossips (probably a trio) and we have a patter song about all the news of the area including everything we never wanted to know about Comte de Genre-Savvy (CdG-S) the IBD and the HL. In the middle of the song CdGS, a baritone or bass, enters and starts making spoken comments about the situations they are singing about. Of course the comments are all about how standard tropes apply. These are ignored by the trio. The trio exits and CdGS sings his introductory aria. He professes his love for IBD but realizes that HL will win her love (tenor and lower class) unless he does something drastic due to opera tropes as he is nobility and a baritone/bass. He sings of how the tropes don’t apply when suitors are of similar status so he has a plan to raise HL’s station to equal his own.
The chorus enters and sings about the festival as they change the scenery from the fields to the village square. CdGS stands on the front apron towards the side and makes spoken commentary about the scene change, the props , and how the musical score reflects the change in location.
*I think this will take us at least to the middle of Act 1 so someone else take it from here*
they seriously expected us to worship cops & soldiers when street cleaners and sanitation workers exist? fuck off i know who my heroes are
nothing sexier than that picture with the italian players on top of eachother after the win and the english ones going through the 5 stages of grief in the back
THIS ONE
i can see it
ITALIAN MANWHORE SUMMER
always reblog italian manwhore summer
Google ai voice: You’re fucked forever
what did we do to deserve portal 2. that shit was so good and for what
we got to have this! we got to have a valve game set in the half life universe, and its an enemies-to-lovers-to-enemies-again sci fi comedy story about a homicidal ai created to run tests forever and the test subject she catches feelings for!! how is this game real!!!
happy birthday to the only video game ever
people still clown in the notes of this post so reminder that glados was gonna take you on a date and accuse you of cheating. shes not chells mom
I turned my notes app vent into a substack post.
A love letter to my sisters, who are not going to read it as one
that post about “you get bandits when you cut soldiers loose without pay” reminds me of the Thirty Years War, because one could say that beneath all the religious schisms and diplomatic jockeying, the heart of the thirty years war was “what happens when you have a state with just enough capacity to raise massive armies but without enough financial capacity to actually pay those armies” and the answer is that the line between professional armies and roving gangs of bandits disappears and every time you try to raise an army it just becomes another independently acting wildfire devouring the countryside. No matter how bad things get, every day I wake up and thank my lucky stars that I do not live in 17th century Europe. Or 17th century China. Or the 17th century Americas. Or basically anywhere in the 17th century.
One of my favorite little anecdotes about ancient mercenaries is that it was tradition for most of history to give your mercenaries two wages- "Bread" and "Gravy." Both were set at a daily value, but where "Bread" was intended to cover regular maintenance and life stuff and therefore paid out frequently (Here's your week's meal and gear repair budget!) the "Gravy" wage was paid out exclusively at the end of the contract as one lump sum. So like, your gravy wage and bread wage might be one silver coin per day each, so you're getting a handful of coins every week to cover food, and then at the end of an 800 day campaign, you get a wheelbarrow with 800 coins.
Employers liked offering this structure because then they didn't have to like, try to guess how long the invasion of spain will take and then carry 800 coins per soldier around the battlefield where it could be captured. It also gives them the chance to budget around the assumption that they take an enemy city and *find* vast sums of treasure even if they don't have the full value at the beginning of the war.
The main flaw of this system is that it's very easy to end up in a scenario where if you have, say, 50,000 guys that have been fighting for 800 days, you now owe 40 million silver to your army, and if the budget has not worked out to a 40 million surplus, you literally can't afford to end the war, but you can probably afford to pay them for a couple more weeks. So then you have to start thinking creatively.
Anyway across all time and history a lot of generals were ultimately beaten to death by men chanting gravy.
The Dom should be praised too
Take care of your doms. Praise them. Make them feel cared for and loved. Or you don't deserve them.
This applies doubly, x10 tbh, to transfemme doms. You NEED to be nice to her, you NEED to let her know she is doing a good job. That transfemme dom might have a lot of issues with her self worth, she may have been used up and left a discarded husk so many times.
Sorry but I got sick of scrolling through the notes on this on desktop and seeing all the red usernames marked by shinigami eyes reblogging this.
I'm a transfemme dom and I'm proud of it. Take care of us. Love us.
And then no one reblogged this version
got banned. spread my bunny spores
as a feminist i think girls should suck each other’s tits more
not to be a joyless hag but I've started seeing genderbent "yuri" shipping Markiplier and Ryan Gosling and I can't help but think of someone I recently I unfollowed for posting that they have an easier time caring about genderbent versions of boy characters than regular fictional women
and I'm also building some connections to that post I made about reading books by Black women (you know the one) and the people who would respond by saying something akin to "joke's on you, I only read fanfic 😜" as if that were some kind of clever loophole and not a demonstration of the exact thing I was talking about
like yes fandom is about fun or whatever but idk man at what point has your desire for no thoughts head empty uncritical consumption left you splashing around in something that's been blended down to an indistinguishable goo for the sake of avoiding anything remotely challenging. with the thing that's "challenging" here being. you know. giving a shit about women and Black people and like frankly anyone but your shippable white men (and honorary Markiplier).
don't make me tap the five year old teen vogue article, etc
All experiences of escapism are not created equally.
abortion clicker early game : you click the belly 50 times in order to perform one abortion. this lets you buy a doctor who performs 0.1 abortions a second.
abortion clicker mid game: you own hundreds of clinics as well as think-tanks which dismantle sex ed courses as well as politicians which strengthen pro choice institutions
abortion clicker late game: the solar system’s resources have been stripped to build a dyson sphere which incubates trillions of humans for the sole purpose of performing abortions on them. once we achieve hyperspace travel, other stars will power superintelligent machines which will simulate octillions of abortion a second
Can someone find me a screenshot of that tweet that's like "one of the little joys of the internet is watching shy depressed nerdy introvert boys become self obsessed hot girls" bc it's really hard to search for properly and I've found nothing so I'm using your collective saved memes as my database
Thanks in advance
THE MELODRAMATIC HOT GIRL SHITPOSTER TWEET
I love this tweet so much I stole part of it for my blog header. This request was written for ME
Fucking THANK YOU SO MUCH THIS IS EXACTLY IT
I think we should just start shoving random extremely nsfw text in the middle of posts to ensure that lazy youtube shorts post readers can’t properly steal them
(panicking) oh god wait uh shit i want to unethically leverage a power dynamic to fuck a maid unprotected
phew
Missed opportunity honestly, why talk about sex when you can instead make the content farms talk about communism instead. Can you image the random guy just quoting
This isn't part of the post. I need to tell you that if you've ever felt sad about the fact that you're not a girl, it's not too late. You can just be a girl. It's allowed. You can be a lesbian. You don't have to suffer thinking about how much you want to be the cool athletic tomboy with the short hair and flat chest, or like that girl you had a crush on in high school despite the fact that she was a lesbian. You can be her. It's not too late. It's never too late.
Marx and Engels nonchalantly? Lmfao easy way to spread theory without making people reading
so what you're gonna do is you're gonna trim the top off a bulb of garlic, using the knife's edge to take off the tip of every individual clove, that's important. you're gonna place the garlic face-up in a square of tinfoil, drizzle with olive oil, wrap completely in foil, place in baking tray, repeat with a copious amount of garlic bulbs. you're gonna put that baking tray in an oven set to 375-400°F, for 30-50 minutes, until soft and browned. you're gonna toast some good bread, slather generously with butter and honey, maybe a tiny lil bit o' salt. and then. you're gonna SQUEEZE. OUT. THAT. ROASTED GARLIC. onto the butter honey toast. and you're gonna eat it. food stolen directly from the plate of the gods. that's what you're gonna do.
the garlic. it beckons you
It occurs to me that "1920s gangster doing a cooking show while holding you at gunpoint" is an untapped market.
We've had normal cooking shows. Now we need period piece cooking shows in character.
I heard it more in a pinktext tone :p
SQUEEZE. OUT. THAT. ROASTED GARLIC. Onto the butter honey toast. And eat it.