Xuebing Du
KIROKAZE
taylor price
Janaina Medeiros
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
wallacepolsom
祝日 / Permanent Vacation
blake kathryn
No title available
NASA
⁂
Kiana Khansmith
titsay
Jules of Nature
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
★
cherry valley forever
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
occasionally subtle
#extradirty
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@flipwizard-mcgee
Discussing the whole "always evil species" thing I'm genuinely annoyed by how much more sense D&D lore makes if elves turn good when they're above ground and evil when they're below ground.
Your elf buddy goes down to get something from the basement and immediately starts cackling and kicking your stuff. "Dammit Bob!" you say, trying to get him up the stairs so he turns good again.
Stop recruiting children as adventurers and then sending them on a quest to my tower to defeat me. It never ends well. The furthest any of them made it was my workshop. I’m tired of burying kids. Even I have a limit.
Where are you even getting these kids? Are you abducting them? Are they orphans? Did their parents agree to this? Half the time they can’t even stand up against an owlbear.
Stop using child soldiers. I use goblin kids as ammo, not soldiers. Both the kids and their parents are fine with it. They’re loyal.
You asked for Kravitz
heck
Hell darling, hell
So happy i was already sitting when this popped on my dash cuz HOLY HELL
Ya know, I hadn’t looked at the notes on in this in awhile but y'all are sweet haha ♥️
For those who asked about my Kravitz
OH FUCK
Commission This Cowpoke!
Howdy, fellers! Do you like supporting queer artists by giving them money in exchange for goods? Do you have a favourite character that just doesn’t get enough love, or an OC that you want to see brought to life? A DnD character you want to see naked? None of the above? Doesn’t matter; I got a deal for you!
I’m Noble, an artist, university student, and cowboy enthusiast looking to get my side-hustle on during my downtime so I can buy things like cat food, human food, tassels, etc.
Fan art ok! Gore ok! NSFW ok! Anthro ok! I don’t do mammals, full furry or mecha, as I’m not proficient in those subjects. More examples of my work are available on my social media: tumblr, twitter, and insta
Contact thru email or DM! Get at me on via tumblr chat, twitter (@NobleMalone69), insta (NobleMalone), or email ([email protected])
Can’t afford a full piece? I get it, times are hard; you can still help me out and shoot me a little bit of cash on ko-fi (NobleMalone69). Every $3+ donation will get a fun little scribble from me!
Really want to help a feller out? Please Reblog! Reblogging is so incredibly important for getting the exposure I need, and I can’t stress enough how big that is for small-timers without a fanbase like myself!!
Thanks, mister!
ahhaha back on my bullshit please hit me up I'm dying
Is it possible that affecting an exaggerated voice of some kind is just Elf Culture in the world of the adventure zone? because it seems like it’s not just taako. when the boys meet elves, talking in a natural register is the exception, not the rule.
with lup, it could just be “oh that’s a family trait,” but Magic Brian, Edward, and Lydia all have very similar vocal patterns. And Jenkins, who I almost forgot was also an elf until I relistened, has a different but equally ridiculous voice.
all i’m saying is, maybe taako wasn’t goofing when he said he was glad to hear magic brian “talk normally”
So Taako’s full name is Taako Taaco, and Legolas from LOTR is known as Legolas Greenleaf. And Legolas, as we know, literally translates to green leaf. So I’m digging this accidental tradition of naming elves the same name twice, but spelled a little differently.
The men, the myths, the legends: Greenleaf Greenleaf and Taako Taaco
I have come to realise that there are only three types of DnD players in regards to dice.
Halflings: I’ll just borrow dice off my friends
Elf: I have 1-3 carefully selected fancy dice sets that I use for everything.
Goblins: the shiny math rocks make click-clack sound. Needs the more. All the more.
goblin trick for improving your mood
get some small rocks in your hands (at least 3 but maybe more if u have big hands)
close your hands together around all the small rocks
shake (rocks will bounce on your hands nd on other rocks. there will be noises. they will be good noises.)
profit
Goblin Advice #1
Pick up [a shiny] (I like roks. You might not. That oky). Look at shiny. Emote. Today can be a good day. It might be 11pm. Day starts then. Today can be a good day. Put shiny in pocket. Find warm plce to hide. Today can be a good day.
“sturdy. denim. blue” is still the biggest fucking plot twist of the century to me.
literally nobody saw it fucking coming. the npc from the first episode who they gave a goofy joke name turning out to be a major character in the plot? fucking iconic. before the episode aired griffin was like “yeah I got really emotional and choked up recording this but I hope you all enjoy it.” any everyone lost their goddamned minds because they thought a character was gonna get pemakilled. instead it just turned out barry blue jeans was back and also he was a fucking powerful lich and everyone lost their goddamned minds again.
I fucking astral projected when that line was uttered. My soul was NOT in my body for the rest of the day. Griffin McElroy fucked me up.
theory: taako is the older sibling reasoning: creating “weasel man” to cheer hurley up after sloane was consumed by the gaia sash, making ren a diploma for his fake school because he felt bad about tricking her, and how those both line up with how taako does silly/extra things to make his sister happy eg; dancing to the thong song when she’s sad
also see; how quickly taako caved when his little sister disagreed with destroying the crystal keeping the robot civilization alive.
conclusion: justin exerts such powerful loving big brother energy it leaks through into his characters
power move: make a d&d character with the same name as your dm
#but with ‘cool’ in front of it
Free worldbuilding idea:
Wizards have the same trust in magic that software designers have in software, which is to say, almost none at all.
“Are you fucking kidding me I worked in a reagrent shop for a few years I don’t trust any of that stuff. Who the hell knows what other components are in the ashes.”
“Yeah I was in the circle that made Alston’s Divine Circle of Teleportation. There’s some pretty nasty corner cases you can get into but the headmaster published it without us. I just take ships. It’s way safer.”
“I call bullshit on that Necromancer channeling spirits of loved ones. What did he say he was using? ‘Medium Conduit Ruinic Circles’? That’s just a bunch of buzzwords slapped together, and they don’t even interact with each other.”
“I’ve been looking at this scroll all morning and I’m 90% sure that the scribe didn’t even look at the standard for pyromancies.”
“Help Desk, this is Gloriline, what did you fuck up this time?” *indistinct vocals* “Dave, I’ve seen the news, and, frankly, I can see the ash cloud from here. You paid for extended support, not enabling support.”
“I can’t get this fucking spell to work, Jane, can you look it?”
*passes a scroll* *a few moments of silence*
“I think you missed a bookend rune right here-”
“GODS DAMN IT! IT’S ALWAYS SHIT LIKE THAT! THANK YOU!” *angrily scribbles on parchment*
(It takes five more aggravatingly tiny adjustments before the spell works)
I don’t play wizards anymore because they’re too much like my day job.
Instead of a orb the wizard has a little statue of a duck he tells his spells to and then swears when he spots the obvious mistake.
You beat me to it! I was going to add that the reason why wizards and witches always have familiars around is so they can Rubber Duck at them until they realize what the mistake with their spell is!
Outsiders get it wrong and figure the familiars are somehow teaching spells to their owners, but no. It’s just explaining to Firewing what you’re trying to do with this teleportation matrix until you realize that you’ve been using telepathy crystals to power it the whole time like a FUCKING IDIOT!
@dmplz
I CAST FUCK YOU
I’m basically like the best violinist ever. Um… but nobody’s ever gonna know who I am and that— I dunno, it just gets to me sometimes, you know?
how to check if a d20 is cursed, thought you might like it :D
Oh, this is interesting. I might have to try this out. But I never would have thought about this.
it actually works. i ended up doing it with all my old dice and about 2/3s of them landed on low numbers
public service announcement to the rpg world (again)
@aunymoons mira mira. Para tus dados!
