Once when I was in undergrad, someone described something as “problematic” in class and our professor was like, “That’s cool, but ‘problematic’ doesn’t really mean anything. It means that the thing you’re describing has a problem, and in and of itself that’s not bad. Art, especially, should always have problems, or else it’s not interesting and not art, either. It sounds like you’re trying to say that this is bad, but you don’t want to say ‘bad.’ Is that right?”
So from then on whenever one of us called something problematic, he would make us talk it out until we could name the “bad” thing we were hinting at. In this particular class, 7/10 it was some type of oppression, and the remainder was like, “I’m uncomfortable because this is very new/confusing/pushing boundaries that made me feel safe.”
Once we stopped calling things “problematic” and stopping at that, class got way more interesting and... we all had to say, like, “that’s racist” or “that’s misogynistic” or “ew capitalism gross” out loud, which a lot of us had never done in a classroom before. Or we had to be like, “Uhhh... I’m not sure what’s so bad?” and confront our own beliefs and that was maybe even more useful.
Anyway. Whenever I see the word problematic, I can’t help but think of this professor being like, “Good starting point, now let’s get specific.” I think when we have to commit to saying “that’s ___” it requires a lot more careful thought about the truth and impact and complexities of whatever we’re claiming. Sometimes there really is some bullshit afoot, and also sometimes it’s art, and it should be full of problems, because that’s what art is.
my interpretation of jaytim has evolved more and more as i analyze the comics myself.
(massive yapperism warning)
surface level understanding of them for me is that they're brothers, because bruce has adopted them both as sons, so therefore they are. i have nothing against this, as it's not wrong. but again, it's like tip of the ice berg
if u dig a little deeper then you know the first thing you'd know about these two is that they have a lot of Violent History (ie murder attempts).
a little more then you know jason doesn't have the best opinion of tim from the get go (literally every media ever), and neither does tim. in modern comics, tim is more a jason apologist. he doesn't blame jason's death on jason's incompetence but on batman (see: knigh terror robin). however, 2000s comics would feature timbin victim blaming jason and going out of his way to prove that he's better than jason to batman (because bruce doesn't really want another robin to die in that suit again).
this is where the split usually is for a lot of both jaytim and jay&tim fans.
post n52, jason and tim are depicted in a more friendly, 'brotherly' way despite literally everything that ever happened. personally, it's just a shit transition. they were at each other's throats at every given moment prior to to all this and then n52 comes up with the rewrite that tim has never been robin but red robin because of jason.... ofc they retconned this now. this is also probably where the whole "jaybin is tim's robin" very popular fanon comes from..
there's also wfa. that's... its own separate issue.
whether you're batfam or batcest, you either lie on the side of the batfamily is one big all nice family no matter how fucked up their history is, or in the side of liking their dysfunctional relationship that is just a litte too nuanced to label them all as a typical found family dynamic.
dick is damian's brother, but there's also interpretations of him as being seen as his father
there's dick and tim as brothers, dick and jason as brothers, but jason and tim aren't decidedly brothers.
bruce sees both as his sons but they don't see each other as brothers.
this is where jaytim writers are having a field day on.
this is where most jay&tim fans kinda dont like it anymore. they rlly like the "jaybin is tim's robin" idea a lot, especially the woobified tim interpretations of being a helpless victim vs big bully bro jason who warms up to the kid. it's either little brother tim who wants to integrate jason back to the family or it's jason feeling guilty over what he did to im and he tries to make up for it. or both.
(ngl that sounds hot in a different context. oh wait. i wonder why that is)
im not saying jaytim isn't notorious for that idea either. im not old enough in this fandom to know which actually started which agenda.
however, most jaytims ive read vs jay&tim has jason and tim in a more equal footing dynamic instead of the imbalanced big bro vs lil bro thing going on. i find it fascinating that them being on equal ground is more prevalent in batcest than in batfam so far. the closest i can get with jay&tim equals is .. funnily wfa.
my conclusion to this is that jaytim as brothers or not is up to whatever anybody wants it to be. dc canon is as solid as wet sand at this point.
if you ask me, jason and tim's brotherhood is as flimsy as the paper bruce signed on.
it doesn't automatically view the other as a sibling, especially after a lot of the shit that happened. to me, jason isn't obligated to integrate himself back into the batfam. i dislike that anyways, mostly bc it's the very rocky ass foundation of jason's writing failing to stick to an actual character development since like... 2005 probably. i have a love-hate relationship with batfam jason todd. on one hand, i do want jason to be loved and have a family again, on the other, the bat clan fucked up the ball way too much—especially bruce, mostly its bruce, it's always you, you freaky old man—for it to work out in the long run and i need jay to be fucking free of them. tim isn't obligated to view jason as a brother either. their relationship never started in that sense anyways, unlike dick and tim. even dick and jason, who didn't treat other that warmly, are brotherly to me.
jason and tim are brotherly. if you squint. and like hope. they're cute tho why tf have i beeen insane over them since last year?
i enjoy them as brothers. i enjoy them as lovers. i enjoy them as both at the same time. that's the great thing about them <333
Dick does NOT like kids. The titans have found this out very fast. Every time they rescue kids and Nightwing has to hold them for some reason he tries his best to be nice and hero-like, he really does. But they Know him and can tell he is very antsy for the kid to be handed off or returned to a parent. And then they've of course seen him let out a stressful sigh after the kid is out of his hands, or heard him right after missions talking about "god I'm so glad that didn't last long." And Dick isn't being mean, he's just not a kid guy, they scare him and they're loud and messy and he's worried about how fragile they are, so he'd just rather leave them far away from him.
So imagine the Titans surprise when jaybin visits and Dick lets out a big "JAYYYYY HIIII" and scoops him up and twirls him and kisses his cheek and Jason is squealing and giggling. The Titans are frozen in place because WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON WITH DICK 😭😭
Frothing at the mouth every time I see a sex ed resource that says "use condoms" without any further elaboration. "Condoms prevent STIs and pregnancy in the vast majority of cases when used correctly" but then they don't talk about what correctly IS
Correct use of a condom means
Using the right size, because if it's too big it can slide off or leak and if it's too small it can break or come off. Condoms usually come in 5 sizes, I'm sure you could find others outside of that as well but in ten years of sex work I found they covered everyone
Using lube, even if you think you don't need it. With the exception of oral sex, condoms should always be used with lube, 100% of the time. Most important lube should be applied to the outside but a drop in the tip of the condom before putting it in is also a good idea
Being mindful that latex is prone to wearing out, being damaged by heat etc. Condoms should be kept somewhere cool, not folded in wallets or sat on in back pockets and should be changed between activities and after about 15 minutes of any vigorous activity. Ask me how I know (a condom snapped on my leg when a client was pulling out, because I didn't change it when I should have)
The penetrative partner should hold the base of the condom when they pull out, and should do so immediately after they ejaculate so the condom doesn't leak or come off as the penis gets flaccid
Bonus: a lot of people think hand stuff can't transmit STIs. Wrong! If you give your partner a handjob and then touch yourself you can get HPV, herpes (low risk), and infections like chlamydia and gonorrhea
This isn't meant to be stressful, and the most common STIs are the most treatable - and often curable - but getting gonorrhea in your eyes after a facial still extremely sucks and yet no one talks about the fact that any mucous membrane can be effected, not just your genitals (yes this includes your mouth and throat)
In ten years of doing sex work where I saw 10 clients a day most of the time I've had 4 condom fails ever. One was what I mentioned above when it snapped on my leg, one was a client on top of me didn't get off fast enough after he finished and the condom came off, and the other two were a Glyde brand magnum that was inexplicably twice the thickness of a regular condom and didn't stay put on anyone so I suggest just avoiding Glyde entirely (their water based lubes also stain fyi). With all other brands correct use = extremely safe
okay. tim calling up jason one night like. hey guess what. i'm pregnant. i have an appointment at planned parenthood tomorrow you can come with or not it's whatever. and jason's on autopilot saying oh of course i'll come bro i gotchu. and that could be it. but all through jason's patrol that night he's got half his brain on these drug runners he's interrogating and the other half going wait. wait. tim is pregnant. i put a baby in tim. inside him. holy shit i knocked up robin. (doesn't even matter if tim is robin at that point or not bc it's just how jason thinks about him). realizing at once how scary it is to be able to alter someone's life so thoroughly and easily and also realizing how hot it is to alter someone's life so thoroughly and easily and how he actually needs his dick inside tim Right Now. one hour later and jason's crawling through tim's living room window, fully geared up and sweaty and bloody, yanking tim out of his desk chair and pinning him to the floor, filling him up again because he can and he wants to.
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