I wish you were here during this holiday season! You’d fit right in with the kids and cat (his picture attached). You might be around the same age as C (19). He’s in college but commutes, so he didn’t exactly have to travel to get here for the holidays. A just turned 15 and I had no idea what to get him this year. What do you get a 15 year old boy? He wants to go on Big Brother someday. Maybe I can get him some kind of overpriced Big Brother merch. L and D, the twins, are 11 ½ so they’re still pretty easy to shop for. Girls are always easier to buy for than boys, I think. When in doubt, nail polish and stuffed animals. D is still obsessed with rainbows and unicorns so she’s easy.
We don’t have a big holiday dinner ready or anything. I’m not much of a cook, and our idea of a family dinner is usually on the couch watching Bob’s Burgers. Mr. P and L like trying new recipes, but since they’re both vegetarian, it’s usually pasta or bread that they make. I love to bake, though, and I make amazing pumpkin muffins. There would definitely be a pumpkin muffin waiting here for you, and of course coffee- Mr. P and I both love Starbucks blonde roast. (How is C 19, in college, and still doesn’t like coffee? Are we sure he’s my kid?)
The decorations are up, though you won’t be surprised to hear that we don’t really go overboard on those either. The plastic tree that gets cobbled together like a reverse dissection every November is clumsily assembled in the corner. It’s covered in so many ornaments you can barely tell it’s a tree, let alone a plastic one. With four kids who went to daycare, preschool, etc. we got a LOT of crappy construction paper bells and play-doh stars to hang on it. I know most of them were not worth keeping or hanging, but for some reason I do anyway. They’re not fancy or even very pretty, but they were made by our family and they’re ours, so on the tree they go. If you have made ornaments as a kid, know that I would hang them up as well. Besides the tree, we have the Elf on the Shelf, which L and D know is not real but they play along anyway. Maybe you would be able to help me find fun hiding places for it every morning. We’ve had it since they were 6, so after 5 holiday seasons, I’m pretty much out of creative Elf on the Shelf options. And you know I’m not much for Pinterest, so I don’t really think to look up fun Elf ideas or anything.
We definitely would welcome you into our home this holiday season. Even though you are not here physically, wherever you are at in your life, I want you to know that you are loved and valued. I care about you just because you are you. I believe that you are destined for joy, growth and freedom. I am sorry for any pain that others have caused you and I want you to know that any negative self talk you tell yourself is not representative of your beautiful spirit. Please give yourself the gifts of love and patience this holiday season. You are strong and I believe in you.
I’ll be thinking of you this year when we have our coffee and hot cocoa and listen to 80s music (we don’t do Christmas music) when the kids open gifts. (Mr. P said to me one year, “Can’t we put on Christmas music? I said, it’s Christmas, this is music, as Duran Duran played in the background.) I don’t have a gift for you to unwrap, but I give you my love and acceptance. I hope they fit just right.
Your Holiday Mom: Mrs. P was originally published on Your Holiday Mom