frckldFirebrands's derangement containment

avatar by @LuzaitisActual on twitter | 25yr | f | just a fanfic writer | comms open

[greatergirlfriend]

never forget what's really important: approval from pervert women on the internet

[jackalopeonline]

if you've been blessed by being attractive and dont even use it by being a tease whats even the point

[orcbara]

i know most leftists agree that everybody should have a right to food, water, shelter, and healthcare but i think a vitally important fifth pillar is privacy. people should not be compelled to be tracked, monitored, or to share personal space with others to access their other essential rights

[lyinginbedmon]

"If you have nothing to hide, you have nothing to fear" is and always has been fascist rhetoric everyone.

[wizardarchetypes]

it’s sooo funny when rude customers encounter employees who can deny them service for the first time.

i was working at a little cafe where I could deny service over bad behavior, harassment etc. & mask mandates had just ended a week before & already people were being weird about me still wearing mine—an N95, the kind shaped kinda like a duckbill.

so this man walked in, looked at me sooo scathingly, laughed at me, and said “damn. never known a woman to choose…practicality over looks.”

And I just said, “oh. you can go, you’re not getting a drink.” And he said, “what???”

I said, “sir, you just walked in at 6 am & called women impractical and me ugly in one sentence.”

And he was so astonished he didn’t even argue he just turned around and left 💀🙏🏻 it was like he suddenly became self aware

[carolinalaurel]

One summer I was running ferry rides across a lake so people could see the waterfalls without walking 6 miles when a guy snapped my bra strap as he was boarding the boat. So i immediately threw him off, he started yelling for my manager, my boss cheerfully informed him that, yeah, she’s the captain of the boat and she can kick off anyone she wants. He goes to storm off, looks expectantly at his girlfriend, and she just goes, “Well, I’M not walking six miles, Michael! I’ll meet you back at the car!” and sits right back down!!!!

The expression on his face when he was told that he couldn’t get on the boat, then immediately told that his girlfriend was ditching him? PRICELESS. he just blinked at her and then stormed off like a child. I gave her a free hat and was like maybe rethink this relationship…….

[hickeywiththegoodhair]

i once had this fucker come up to order a beer. while i pour it he shows me the wanky fucking chemical structure tattoo on his arm and he’s like “hey. you know what this is” i was like “nah sorry” (never cared abt chemistry in school, plus having to look at a some rando’s pretentious tattoo gives me the douche chills). he decides to respond with “heh. you must not read many books”

i immediately stop pouring his beer. i reply: “heh. you must not want this beer.” thirsty boy immediately starts groveling like a worm “please please no i do want the beer im sorry im sorry” believe me when i say it was one of the most pathetic things ive ever witnessed

[lezbadeez]

gotta love people immediately backpedaling when they realise that there are Consequences To Being Mean

[lastvalyrian]

I genuinely believe that part of why it has become so normalized to be openly callous and evil in politics is that customer service culture has trained affluent people that they can treat everyone they consider beneath them however they want and still be treated kindly.

[lei-fang82]

[he-sees-dem0ns]

reblog to fucking bite the person you reblog from

[komorebigold]

Uhhh. How'd that happen?

[More Comics]

[komorebigold]

Made a tumblr exclusive edition of the comic. Just for the haha funnies... not any other reason.

[scorpio-system]

AAA video game publisher voice: "Look. The goose layed a golden egg, and that's nice! Everyone loved that egg. But keeping the golden goose means paying for bird feed and I don't want to, so I killed the goose."

[polyamzeal]

[filthburger]

this post is like a rorshach test that reveals people's psychosexual frustrations

[starlightomatic]

[dddemigirl]

[sylviii]

“she’s got legs for days” pfffft not impressive. i;ve had mine for years

[neverendingmidnightsun]

how do you guys vocalize the punchline semicolon silly-punctuation I always imagine it’s a teenage boy voice crack

[jollyfurydragonballer]

[hatesaltrat]

I’m fuckin howling at this!

“Ooh, another one is gone”

The funniest thing I’ve seen all week.

[hatesaltrat]

I’ve sent this to so many people today and I giggle each time all over again.

[teaboot]

I believe that one of the greatest thrills in life is that slumdog millionaire type flashback to a bizarre and unique bit of obscure knowledge that gives you an incredibly unlikely advantage at a critical moment.

What nobody tells you is that if you collect enough weird knowledge and experience you can ride that particular dragon minimum once a month

[teaboot]

Powered by the force of Autism, ADHD, and Unparalleled Childlike Whimsy, I hope to increase the frequency of these lil muchahos 300% by 2035

[galileosballs]

You can get it down to once a week if you join a pub trivia team.

[demilypyro]

ADHD is so embarrassing. I ran out of conditioner and I've been too busy to go buy more so I've been showering without for like 2 days. I just turned around and finally noticed four bottles of conditioner on my shelf. I stocked up. I always stock up. How did I even forget that I stocked up? The bottles just faded into the background. What's wrong with me

[demilypyro]

They should put yellow paint on objects in my house so I know I can interact with them

[greatlordfluffernutter]

The yellow paint will also fade into the background

[demilypyro]

GGGHRRRRR

[brw]

Hetbait kind of goes harder than queerbait sometimes. Queerbait you understand that the creators very rarely could do it even if they wanted to so implication and suggestion was better and safer than being explicit. Hetbait though there's no such justifiable reason they just want to fuck with you.

[heroicmeep]

This fall, Project Red Sun takes its first public test flight as a new combat flight action game on PC; Wishlist us on Steam, and follow us on our social media accounts to keep updated on development, demos, cool frogs we find, and info about our game! Bsky: https://bsky.app/profile/fleetwoodzak.bsky.social Discord: https://discord.com/invite/GjP49D9AXM

Project Red Sun on Steam

Project Red Sun is a combat flight action game that has you fighting across the world as a heroic ace against corporate armies who will spar

[camilicy]

Everyone loves trudy 🐱 commission

[frckld]

my baby girl,,,

[cookiekurimu]

My HC of Eye Tee!!! (and a bit of Driver :3)

art by cookie