Elliott's frontal cortex

[That/he/she] reblogs and the occasional brain cell

[rainydaymay]

Being high has me saying things like “I like friends” as if it’s some profound relization

[rainydaymay]

Actually I think I do this sober too

[rainydaymay]

I’m glad we’re in agreement

[draconym]

When I am king, we will valorize sanitation workers the way we currently valorize the military

[thegrindingwheel]

So heroic posters showing trashmen battling allegorical monsters? I'm down.

[draconym]

Yeah but that's just the beginning. I also want Sanitation Worker Discounts at every business and blockbuster movie propaganda glorifying sanitation work. I want random people to salute garbage collectors and thank them for their service. I want drivers who get impatient with the recycling truck and honk at it and swerve around it to become social pariahs

[gaynehollander]

Shane set out to learn Russian because he didn't want the burden of communicating in their second language to always fall on Ilya, by default. He also wanted to learn more about Ilya's culture through the language, he wanted to hear his husband make jokes in his mother tongue, to get to know the side of him that comes out entirely unimpeded when he doesn't have to filter himself through his second language. He expected to mostly use it at home, perhaps especially when Ilya was feeling overwhelmed. However, once Shane actually learns Russian to the point that he's fully conversational, they mostly use it to shit talk people in public.

[pluvialcity]

shane waking ilya up at the cottage with his "wait, I have another idea" monologue about starting a charity makes me think that shane is one of those people who just Does That periodically

like he'll be gnawing on an idea for a couple days, and he'll go to sleep thinking about it, and then one day he'll wake up at 3am and it's finally done percolating and he has to Tell Someone About It Right Now and every time ilya is just like

[mutinsfromthemoon]

it’s a random day on their honeymoon and ilya is at the pool with shane when he notices he’s without his sunglasses. so he heads back to the hotel to grab them from their room. he’s on his way to the elevator when the receptionist calls out “mr. hollander?” and ilya stops and is about to correct her when it hits him. he’s in fact mr. hollander. and he’s just standing there grinning like an idiot in front of the receptionist who is explaining something to him that he’s not listening to at all. and when the receptionist says again “mr. hollander?” ilya goes “i’m sorry, can you explain again?” with the sappiest grin on his face.

[king-monky]

thanks keyboard, when I accidentally typed hest instead of best I totally wanted the hest (norwegian word for horse) emoji

[lilium-orientalis-deactivated20]

It can happen to the

of us

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

It was the hest of times, it was the horse of times

[smokingrozanov]

I like to imagine during Ilya’s two year long hole hunt he was constantly bragging about how nobody was ever gonna tie him down. Hanging out with Svetlana like I don’t even have to ask pussy comes to ME 🤑🤑🤑 & then under the table at the club he’s pulling up Jane’s contact going “PLEASE JUST A PHOTO OF THE SLIT PLEASE BABY”

[nociceptrix]

finding out you spent most of your life dissociated is a HUGE bummer

[nociceptrix]

i thought shit didnt stick to me cuz i was slick but its cause i wasnt there #LAME

[elnotwoods]

shane cockwarming ilya this, shane cockwarming ilya that… this fandom tends to forget that ilya is a throat goat and freaking loves to suck a dick, he swallows cause he “does not mind” (i.e. moans harder when shane cums down his throat than shane himself.. you know - the person cumming)

add to it that ilya loves resting his head in peoples laps, getting his hair played with.. and has an oral fixation

so what i am saying is that ilya loves, loves, LOVES! cockwarming shane - sometimes they just chill on the couch, watching a renovation show or a movie ilya isn’t particularly interested in so while he rests his head in shane’s lap he simply turns around, tugs shane’s sweats down and puts shane’s cock in his mouth

they stay like that for a long time, ilya gets all floaty and sleepy bc shane’s hand is stroking through his hair, lightly scratching at his scalp and his cock is in his mouth

when ilya gets antsy again he starts sucking him off and gets him to come quickly, swallowing at the end of course and goes back to cockwarming him if shane wants to continue watching his show

[lavenderprose]

Once again I am thinking about Shane and his lines #HisLines. Particularly during sex. He and Ilya have a rich and varied sex life, of course, and in any given week you can expect them to both Try Something New and Play The Hits. Either way, Ilya knows that he can expect to hear a few key phrases:

- Please Sir/Please Ilya/Please Baby (Self-explanatory and dependent on mood)

- OhMyGod

- I love your cock

- Harder oh my god harder (Said no matter how hard Ilya is going, btw. Sometimes harder actually means faster or is a signal to switch positions and Ilya figures it out, obviously)

- Keep going keep going keep going

- I love you

- I’m coming (Ilya is biiiiig into orgasm announcement ever since Shane said “I’m coming for you” that first time so. Obviously Shane noticed him going Sicko Mode and it was incorporated immediately and expeditiously into His Lines)

- Keep going (Overstim yay)

- That Was So Fuckin Hot

Ilya, of course, knows and loves the lines. Loved the fun little call-and-response of their sex, especially the more vanilla, familiar sex. At some point he alludes to this during foreplay, he’s being playful and clocks Shane’s OhMyGod IlyaThat’sSoGood face and says it with him at the same time. And Shane goes internal and quiet and Ilya has to kiss on him and murmur that he thinks it’s so sweet and sexy and Shane says, “Are you sure it’s not boring, am I boring you?” And Ilya ‘Intimacy Kink’ Rozanov has to explain to his own husband that he thinks the boring is. Actually quite exquisitely horny.

[dogpuppy]

[doubleca5t]

[miiilowo]

reminiscing on when i went cave diving a couple years back & another dude who was in there was playing minecraft music out of his backpack so i just heard c418 slowly approaching me from within an actual cave. shoutout to that guy

[miiilowo]

i briefly experienced what it was like to be steve for real for about 4 minutes

[nerdy-yappin]

Batman gets hurt and Superman is helping him and Clark jokingly says “you’re being such a good boy” and Bruce has to give all of his willpower not to completely dissolve into a mess. Clark can hear Bruce’s heart literally skip a beat and he just laughs to himself. He found a new way to get under the bat’s skin.

[taydaughter]

not all your fave blorbos can be masochists some of those fuckers gotta enjoy beating the shit out of someone during sex

[emmiegoesinsane]

shane when he joins the ottawa centaurs:

[gaynehollander]

Luca raising himself up on his knees and turning around in his seat on the airplane to ask Ilya something, while the rest of the plane is mostly asleep, only to come face to face with Shane and Ilya looking like two deer in headlights, staring at him wide-eyed, Ilya two fingers deep in Shane's mouth and body curled around him. Luca slowly turning back around and lowering himself down in his seat, whatever he meant to ask completely forgotten, face flushed, and afraid he will never be able to look his captain or his alternate in the eye again.

[normal-horoscopes]

Everyone shut up and look at this carving of a whale from the 1200-600 CE Chumash culture

[theslowesthnery]

ohhhhhh my godddddd