Product Placement
will byers stan first human second
bliss lane
No title available
The Bowery Presents
Cosmic Funnies
ellievsbear
izzy's playlists!
RMH
Jules of Nature
#extradirty
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
No title available
h
noise dept.
Today's Document
Kiana Khansmith
Claire Keane
titsay
occasionally subtle
seen from United States
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@fronzie
MEET ME + SPEED PAINT
Finally ezequil has the guts to come and speak with you all! being so dead booty if you want more info I can open my (ONLY MAIN) questions!!
YAP SESSIONS
STARLIGHT EXPRESS x MoTH
LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS x PIERCE
MORE COMING SOON
been having health issues, in a foul mood, I DEMAND YOU TELL ME A STORY whilst i languish in bed like a sickly victorian lord wasting away from consumption (as my stoic but broad-shouldered valet gently wipes the sweat from my trembling brow)
My Lord, I have a story for you to ponder, and it is one of my best.
Once upon a time, in a kingdom that was not enormously large, nor very small, there lived a sad and lonely princess.
She was not sad because she was lonely, as one might believe, but rather she was lonely because she was sad. All of her ladies in waiting would chitter and pace at her bedside, urging her to rise, to dress in some of her many fancy adornments, and leave her tower to go and dance in the great hall with them, but the princess always declined.
Soon, they stopped asking.
For years, people lost their will to bother her. She was alone in her tower, and as the months passed her loneliness grew until she could do nothing else but stare out of her decorated window and sigh wistfully out it at the common people below.
But dear lord, this is not a sad tale, I promise it.
For in this kingdom there lived a strange and magical creature. Members of this kingdom might not know what it was called, or where he was from, but the magical creature had a name, and his name was Ricodimous.
Ricodimous had a face like a mouse, eyes cunning and dark, and a shell by which he rolled himself into, in case the world got too much, too loud.
One day, Ricodimous was puttering through the market when he heard the most wistful sigh he had ever heard in his entire life. He looked about, questioning, but saw nothing until he rolled back onto his shell and gazed up, up high until he could see a window over the market square, where the saddest and loneliest princess of all sat on her window seat.
"Hello Princess!" He called. And even though the distance between them was great, Ricodimous was a magical creature, and the Princess heard him perfectly.
She gazed down at the wondrous little creature Ricodimous was, and sighed again.
"Hello Ser," she greeted politely. "You should roll along, for I am not of the finest stock for company."
Ricodimous tilted his head.
"You look to me to be the finest stock of anything," he replied. "Why do you believe not?"
The princess simply shrugged.
Ricodimous pondered for a moment. As a magical creature, his guesses on the ailment of princesses were often correct.
"Your heart is aching," he declared. "But you are too shy to say it."
The princess raised an eyebrow in surprise. "You assume much, Ser."
"I assume enough. Pray, would you come down from your tower, and we shall play a game."
The princess could not deny that she had longed to play a game for a time, even if it was with a mouse like creature.
For the first time in years, the Princess dressed herself in her finest silks, and exited her tower with a flourish. Dressed in deep blues and greens, she at last came down to the marketplace and met Ricodimous by the gardens entrance.
The game they played my lord, is one similar to Croquet. I will admit my lord, that this is a game I myself have never played, so you must use your imagination with my storytelling, and simply believe that while you know the rules, so do I.
And so the Princess and Ricodimous played their game, over the course of which the Princess found herself more and more joyous. She indulged in a full commitment of the sport, soiling her finest clothes all so she could kneel in the mud and get a better angle.
Even more scandalously, the Princess was referred to by her royal title less and less, which tends to happen when one is losing a game so terribly he must roll up into his shell and rock back and forth from frustration. So over the day the Princess was called more and more by her name, Ashley, and Ricodimous was simply called Ric.
But the sun was soon to set, and all stories, no matter how brief must end.
At the end of their game there was only one true winner, and Ashley wiped her royal brow and shoot Rics paw, smiling in victory. The magical creature was not disappointed, for he promised to never give up, and that he would return the next day for a rematch.
Princess Ashley was surprised.
"You mean that you'll come back?" She asked, and she realized how excited she was at the prospect.
"Of course I will!" Ric replied. "I would never run around and desert you."
And with that, Ric rolled away.
I'm hacking up blood on my deathbed and you do THIS to me
Posting fanart for a fandom where the creator will most likely see it feels like I’m a child gifting art to my teacher.
Like. Hi mr escaped :). I drew you something. It’s of your character that’s a cool werewolf hunter. And. and he’s. He’s fighting a cool werewolf, with his cool gun. Do you like it.
(Posts it on my refrigerator)
Reblog if you think the person you reblogged this from deserves to be happy.
Nobody is allowed to reblog this from me, I am evil
Evil people deserve to be happy I think you have internalised evil-phobia
trans women r literally so cool theu get tits AND a prostate?? i thought only markilpler could do that
i need 2 stop posting after taking my sleep meds jesus christ
hey guys we don't have to rb this post. like we can keep it to ourselves. we can let this post not be rbed.
Game of the year
happy 20 year anniversary of Neil banging out the tunes!
though every rat is special, it's a wonderful and unusual thing for their accomplishments to be remembered and cherished by so many people so many years later. we're all so fortunate to know about the rat who banged out the tunes!
thank you to all the people who sent me reference photos of their beloved rats for this piece!!! credits under the cut!
Let’s not forget to acknowledge Alexandre Dumas this Black History Month
The writer of two of the most well known stories worldwide, The Three Musketeers and The Count of Monte Cristo was a black man.
That’s excellence.
Let’s not forget that he was played on screen by a white man. And the fact that he was black is barely ever mentioned or the book he wrote inspired by his experiences.
Other things not to forget about Alexandre Dumas:
chose to take on his slave grandmother’s last name, Dumas, like his father did before him.
grew up too poor for formal education, so was largely self-taught, including becoming a prolific reader, multilingual, well-travelled, and a foodie, resulting in his writing both a combination encyclopedia/cookbook (which just— is fucking outrageous to me) AND the adaptation of The Nutcracker on which Tchaikovsky based his ballet
he also wrote a LOOOOT of nonfiction and fiction about history, politics, and revolution, bc he was pro-monarchy, but a radical cuss, and that got him in a lot of hot water at home and abroad.
even beyond that, he generally put up with a lot of racist bullshit in France, so he went and wrote a novel about colonialism and a BLATANTLY self-insert anti-slavery vigilante hero (which he then cribbed from to write the Count of Monte Cristo, the main character of which, Edmond Dantés, Dumas also based on himself).
(…a novel which also features a LOAD of PoC beyond the Count, and at LEAST one queer character, btw, bc EVERY MOVIE ADAPTATION OF ANYTHING BY DUMAS IS A LIE; seriously, at LEAST one of the four Musketeers is Black, y'all.)
famously, when some fuckshit or other wanted to come at Dumas with some anti-Black foolishness, Dumas replied, “My father was a mulatto, my grandfather was a Negro, and my great-grandfather a monkey. You see, Sir, my family starts where yours ends.”
for the bicentennial of his birthday, Pres. Jacques Cirac was like, “…sorry about the hella racism,” and had Dumas’s ashes reinterred at the Panthéon of Paris, bc if you’re gonna keep the corpses of the cream of the crop all together, Dumas’s more widely read and translated than literally everybody else.
and they are still finding stuff old dude wrote, seriously; like discovering “lost” works as recently as 2002, publishing stuff for the first time as recently as 2005.
ALSO IMPORTANT:
SWAG
I am absolutely ashamed to admit I had NO idea Dumas was black.
when this post first went around (a year ago apparently) I was like BUT WHAT ABOUT DADDY DUMAS THOUGH because basically
daddy general dumas was an immense fierce french warrior who was a 6 foot plus, stunningly gorgeous and charismatic Black gentleman
he invaded egypt
the native egyptians said “is this napoleon? this must be napoleon. we for one welcome our majestic new overlord”
then napoleon showed up
napoleon has all the presence of yesterday’s plain Tesco hummus
the native egyptians were like “… no… no, we’ve thought very hard and we’ll have General Dumas actually”
this did not make napoleon happy
in fact it made him jealous
napoleon felt so emasculated that he launched a campaign of revenge against General Dumas, including taking away his pension, that probably inspired a lot of Alexandre’s rather satisfying scenes in which fathers are nobly avenged and the money-grubbing villains are rubbed in the mud
I was never taught that he was Black either. WTF.
General Dumas (aka Thomas Alexandre Davy de La Pailleterie) looked like this…
…and like this…
…while “Napoleon has all the presence of yesterday’s plain Tesco hummus“…
:-D
I suspect Alexandre Dumas would have laughed at that, because besides looking like someone who laughed a lot…
…he was also a foodie.
He was also born in present-day Haiti. Back then, it was the French colony of Saint-Domingue.
General Dumas was also the highest ranking officer of African descent to have command of a European army. EVER.
His stuff is in the public domain, you can find them on Project Gutenberg here:
Project Gutenberg offers 73,007 free eBooks for Kindle, iPad, Nook, Android, and iPhone.
And for those of you who would like to try audio versions, this is what is on LibriVox, the free, volunteer run audiobook version of Project Gutenberg:
LibriVox
it really…this actually breaks my heart a little - just how much of my history has been kept from me and erased
i had no idea dumas was black until this post and i just…idk it never even occurred to me that him not being white was a very real possibility, bc that means the erasure worked that the continual erasure of black history, my history, worked and it’s all really feeding this story that blackfolk have never accomplished anything other than crime that colonialism is so horny to tell
…idk it’s just making me really sad…
I need to make a supercut of everytime Cervantes said something problematic in NiFODD and just speedrun getting myself canceled.
" Edmond, I hate you! You’re a [idek, just a lot of words] and I want you to ravish me! "
" CEVANTES. YOU CANT SAY THAT THEN SAY ‘RAVISH ME’! "
" BUT EDMONDDDDDDDD "
so bECAUSE OF THE UPDATE I WENT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING AT 12AM SO NATURALLY SOMEONE THOUGHT I WAS BEING MURDERED AND CALLED THE POLICE AND WHEN THEY GOT HERE I HAD TO GIVE THEM MY EXPLANATION FOR SCREAMING AT 12AM SO I JUST SAID HOMESTUCK AND ONE OF THE COPS EYES SUDDENLY GOT REALLY BIG AND THEN HE SAID “IT UPDATED??!?” AND THEN HE READ THE UPDATE ON HIS PHONE I HAVE A GROWN POLICE MAN SITTING IN MY DRIVEWAY CRYING AND CURSING AT HUSSIE UNDER HIS BREATH HIS PARTER GAVE HIM A SHOCK BLANKET OH MY GOD
I think on some level this isn’t even exactly a lie it’s sort of like when a 4 year old tells you that they can talk to dogs or they can fly when no one’s looking or whatever it’s like undeveloped brains not even knowing how to conceive of what a truthful statement is
@hellsite-hall-of-fame (sorry if you’ve been tagged already!)
He made me go insane because of Popeye's
He made me mad, he go in corner for punishment
oh you're on tumblr.com? name three presidents you've stolen the shoelaces from
cue the music
Hey if you’re schizophrenic/psychotic I just want you to know that you’re a wonderful person and that you deserve so much better than the demonization, marginalization and stigmatization you face in this society.
Please consider reblogging this/other positivity posts for schizophrenic/psychotic people every once in a while. If you have more than 100 followers, odds are that a couple of them experiences psychosis and that they rarely see positivity posts for people with their symptoms.
Just met a trans man who's going on T because he specifically wants to be bald and i'm afraid to say i think i'm just never gonna meet anyone cooler than that ever again
That's super funny but...
Write it badly or it'll never be written
Write it badly or it'll never be written
Write it badly or it'll never be written
Write it badly or it'll never be written
Write it badly or it'll never be written
Please keep interacting with this post because when I come to tumblr to procrastinate, this shows up again in my notifications and guilts me into writing again
HEY ARTISTS!
Do you design a lot of characters living in not-modern eras and you’re tired of combing through google for the perfect outfit references? Well I got good news for you kiddo, this website has you covered! Originally @modmad made a post about it, but her link stopped working and I managed to fix it, so here’s a new post. Basically, this is a costume rental website for plays and stage shows and what not, they have outfits for several different decades from medieval to the 1980s. LOOK AT THIS SELECTION:
OPEN ANY CATEGORY AND OH LORDY–
There’s a lot of really specific stuff in here, I design a lot of 1930s characters for my ask blog and with more chapters on the way for the game it belongs to I’m gonna be designing more, and this website is going to be an invaluable reference. I hope this can be useful to my other fellow artists as well! :)
To celebrate Easter we took jello shots out of an ovapositor. #jesuslovesme
I shoved a dildo full of alcoholic jello and then allowed myself to be filmed consuming the jello from the dildo and I promise y'all I did it for more than 2 notes. I posted this on facebook. My mother watched this video.
I found it! This post is like my tumblr white whale. It’s like a heritage post without the heritage.
I love tumblr
