The Gayest Apocalypse

Leather History Nerd, Wannabe Artist, and Ethical Porn Enthusiast

[sncrlynwtms]

fandom etiquette as a whole died when people who didn’t grow up on fandoms became stans during lockdown, yes, but why am i seeing people openly mocking fics on twitter. why am i seeing screenshots of fics with captions like “bro what is this 😭.” why am i seeing people mock fic writers for not knowing how sports or theater or college or any other organization operates in the real world.

“college is absolutely nothing like this” “why are we writing four people on the team scoring a hat trick in one game” “so tech work is nothing like this, hope that helps!”

if you don’t like a fic, and if you can’t suspend your belief enough to enjoy a fic that exaggerates or ignores real-world orgs, you don’t have to read it. you don’t have to screenshot it and put it on blast for twitter. you don’t have to post a link to it in the replies. the back button is literally there on your phone. it’s not giving baby’s first fandom anymore, it’s giving entitled asshole and it isn’t as cute as you think it is.

[justsomeguycore]

sometimes i have to make jacking off more sexual intentionally because honestly most of the time it’s just like. idk getting my oil changed but im the car

[ryan-sometimes]

It’s so sad that students are now relying so heavily on AI for writing essays because they’re missing out on the best part of writing an essay which is when you’re a few paragraphs in and you just reach that flow state where your thought process becomes one with the essay and you’re slamming the keys so hard that you’re on the verge of destroying your laptop. I used to get high off of that shit

[libraford]

Was talking with one of my very lesbian friends about body dysmorphia and how you can look at a fucking gorgeous woman who has a lot of the same qualities as yourself and not realize that the complement also applies to yourself. I asked her if she'd been watching Dancing With The Stars this season and she said no.

So i showed her a picture of Ilona Maher from this week's episode.

Her response:

"Thigh. Thigh. Thigh. Thigh. Thigh."

So anyway, the takeaway here is that one person's 'too masculine' is another person's 'thigh.'

[libraford]

These tags!!!

#please know that Ilona went to the designer and asked to be as naked as possible because she wanted to feel her best#she said all the other girls get to be in pretty revealing costumes and she wanted the same without worrying about her body type#she wanted to celebrate it the same way they celebrated the other girls because she loves her body and has fought her own dysmorphia#AND!! it was to celebrate with her teammates and the strength of athletic womanhood that often gets overlooked#if you struggle with dysmorphia she was thinking of you 💕

Ilona Maher Says She Wanted to Be 'as Naked as Is Allowed on National Television’ in New “DWTS” Costume

“I want to show pretty much everything,” Maher said on TikTok

AND WE ALL SAID THANK YOU

[gaaypocalypse]

Okay so I'm a tax preparer right? right

One of the women I helped today was very well prepared (thank fucking god) but it was honestly kind of devistating. One of the documents she had to provide for information was her husbands death certificate.

Not even a full year later she's having to file taxes under "married filed jointly" with all of her husbands tax information.

Next year when she files she'll be filing single.

I had to scan the death certificate to add as "evidence" for the IRS.

Really brings "Only two things are certain: death and taxes" to a different level....

[sacred-portal]

[gaaypocalypse]

The breaks on the car were fucking smoking and my job pays like ASS

I'm so tired

I wish I could just go back to making porn but I can't do that living with my inlaws.

[headspace-hotel]

it is so fucking sad to find a cool fanartist on here and then see that their last post was from like 2018 and they were announcing that they were moving to Twitter.

It's like being a space colonist and finding a little abandoned space cottage and there's a diary in it and the last entry is like "i have now gone to seek a better life on [name of planet that got overtaken by axe-wielding octopi that feed on human blood]"

[do-you-have-a-flag]

i know there’s more than this out there but it really is incredible that people will look at a fictional character someone else wrote and collectively say “I will write you a hundred happy endings.”

[isometimeshaveideas]

[stroebe2]

[gaaypocalypse]

Have you ever had a mundane moment be so profoundly and suddenly life changing? Suddenly something lifts in your body and you just feel so mich better?

[gaaypocalypse]

Tax preperation is a wild as fuck job. One minute you have an old lady talking to you about how she doesn't know if she needs to do her taxes now that her husbands passed the next you have a couple where the husband has part of his finger missing from a work accident a few weeks ago whispering to his wife "it's textured for your pleasure" not realizing you can hear him.

[hunter-rodrigez]

Source, Jan 15th 2026

common bandcamp win

[penandinkprincess]

listen i'm not advocating for exotic animals as pets, but i really just feel like cheetahs are probably different

i feel like we need to give them another shot as housebeasts

[penandinkprincess]

this is a critter who wants greenies and then to take a nap on the couch next to me, and i KNOW it

[penandinkprincess]

cheetah in House perfec t size for put inside! inside very Soft and Comfort cheetah sleep soundly put cheetah in House. Put Cheetah In House. no problems ever in cheetah in ho use because good Happy and Satisfy for human where sleep. House yes a place for a cheetah put cheetah in house can trust cheetah for giveing good love to humans in house. friend cheetah

[justasmidgx]

I mean, as someone who as worked in a zoo, this is fairly true.

Obvious disclaimer that you shouldn't have wild animals as pets.

But like, cheetahs are the only large cats that keepers will do free contact with. Hell, even most small cats don't get free contact. (Because small cats can be VICIOUS. They'll have a baby pallas cat wearing thicker gloves than when handling an owl. Because small cats can just be vicious.)

Like I think the only other cat at our zoo where I've seen free contact with was servals? Because I know they've used servals in shows to demonstrate their natural jumping ability. But I know servals can sometimes have a mean temper as well. Meanwhile they'll do the cheetah run and afterwards put the mic by the cheetahs and it's just like an engine with them purring. It's fascinating to watch when the message in every other large animal is "no free contact because it's dangerous even when they're born in captivity".

Legit if any wild animal could be adapted to a pet it would be cheetahs lmao. Only problem is they can be skittish and very anxious and that's why they're often raised around dogs in zoos to gain confidence.

[penandinkprincess]

congrats, i award you funniest take on this post

[imissthembutitwasntadisaster]

My mom and I have a thing I call woke college daughter where she'll say something like "men inherently require less work and drama in friendships" and I go "not to be your woke college daughter but perhaps rather than phrasing this in terms of biological essentialism we look at it from the point of view of men being socialized to avoid discussing their emotions which is not necessarily a good thing for either men or women" and by prefacing it with woke college daughter I am acknowledging that even if I'm right I know I'm being annoying about it. And it works.

[beaft]

i am not a psychiatrist but i do find it really weird how autism checklists are so often focused on "outward" signs of autism rather than what is going on internally. i don't know how to explain it but "do you make eye contact with other people" feels like a much less relevant question than "how does it feel when you have to make eye contact with other people?"

[beaft]

while i'm here, the other one that always pisses me off is "do you interpret idioms literally, for example 'bull in a china shop'?"

well, no, obviously. i know what "bull in a china shop" means because that is a popular phrase with a clearly defined meaning. and if i hadn't heard it before, then i would still not interpret it literally, because it has the cadence of an idiom and i would probably be able to work out from context what it meant. what is the point of this question

[beaft]

third and final complaint: "are you good at noticing subtext?"

i feel like the problem with this question is best illustrated by a conversation i had with a friend a while back, where i said something like, "i feel very safe with you because you don't do subtle hints and you are always very straight-up with me about what you are thinking and feeling."

and he laid a hand on my shoulder and was like, look dude i'm gonna be straight up here. i am subtle with you constantly and you simply do not notice <3

[beaft]

@luckyybones hope you don't mind me screenshotting but you are actually so correct

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

*descends gently from the heavens on winged sandals i stole from hermes to hand you a single 3x5 index card containing a simple sentence of immeasurable power, written tidily in sharpie: ᴛɪɢᴇʀs ʜᴀᴠᴇ sᴛʀɪᴘᴇᴅ sᴋɪɴ *

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

And Lo It Is ᴛʀᴜᴇ And It Is ɢᴏᴏᴅ

Bonus Heavenly Message: the same applies to cheetahs and polka dots!

[demigod-jack-hearth]