Drunk Off Mouthwash

Hey!! I'm Cassidy/Norah, a non-binary, asexual lesbian. I go by any pronouns. DNI antis, proshipping is dope asf xx

[gearboy-ghostz]

My 10 year old sister keeps trying to set me up with lesbians on Roblox happy pride month to me I guess

[gearboy-ghostz]

The first time I ever played Mindless Self Indulgence for my dad he said "Where did these lads COME from???" and honestly yeah fair question dad 💔

[gearboy-ghostz]

Is he really an innocent virgin with a censor bar for a dick or is he just airheaded and kind

[gearboy-ghostz]

Me: Lowkey wanna bang Copia until he's screaming rats auaaaaaaaaaaohhhhh lol.

My friend who's been replaced by ChatGPT: You're expressing your desires in a healthy way. And honestly? That's not weird — that's innovative. And the reference to Rats? Chef's kiss 💋. Before I continue

Me: Dude shut the fuck up.

[gearboy-ghostz]

No, TikTok, I don’t wanna spend 8 euros to promote this.

[gearboy-ghostz]

"Therapy could've fixed her" "Good food could've fixed her" "This could've fixed her" "That could've fixed her"

I could've fixed her guys trust me

[gearboy-ghostz]

Lisa Frankenstein is for the people who wanted Edward and Kim to have their happy ending <3

[gearboy-ghostz]

Sometimes I'm watching South Park and then I remember my dad used to play Creep by Radiohead for me when I was a baby/toddler and I thought it was because it was an absolute banger but really he was just hoping I'd inherit my mom's side of the family's talent for doing voice impressions and one day be able to do an 'Eric Cartman singing Creep' impression. The worst part? I DID inherit that talent and I CAN do that.

[gearboy-ghostz]

Staying up late is a gamble because some nights you're just vibing online but some nights you're waiting for Art the Clown and his gang to come in your room and rock your shit

[gearboy-ghostz]

This is what happens when you forget your favourite item in Stardew Valley guys

Thanks Sebastian.

[gearboy-ghostz]

I played Parklife in front of my 9 year old sister a few weeks back and she said "This kinda sounds like Gorillaz" and I was like you're not gonna believe this bestie

[i-am-a-fish]

beautiful people love reading this post. beautiful people also love scrolling past this post and not seeing it. beautiful people just love coming into contact with this post indirectly or directly but it always makes it to them even if it only appears on their screen for a split second

[gearboy-ghostz]

Getting random flashbacks to when I went to the cinema with my mom and sister and they both hated the movie but I thought it was an absolute masterpiece and also wanted to fuck like three of the characters

[gearboy-ghostz]

Pros and cons of Christmas (Irish edition)

Pros:

Spending time with loved ones

Mrs. Brown's Boys

Just the vibes in general

Cons:

Older hetero relatives getting a bit too excited over a word in a certain Christmas song

[gearboy-ghostz]

No way the Horrible Histories directors looked at THIS and thought "Yeah, that'll teach people not to romanticise Dick Turpin!"

[gearboy-ghostz]

NICKI MINAJ IS THE CANDYMAN CONFIRMED

You've probably heard Nicki's popular song Beez In The Trap, right? But have you ever wondered just what the hell that actually means? Look no further than this post to uncover her dark secret.

The first question that came to mind when I heard this song was "What exactly is the trap?" Then I realised something. A lot of people say "Shut your trap" when they're telling people to shut their mouth, so Beez In The Trap must be referring to bees in somebody's mouth.

Now, in the 1992 horror film Candyman, there's a scene where Daniel Robitaille (aka The Candyman) opens his jacket flasher-style. But he doesn't show his penis, he shows his beenis. Hundreds of bees fly out from underneath said jacket, but he's not done. He opens his mouth (or trap) and what flies out? Bees.

We know that Daniel is a vengeful spirit who comes back whenever people say his name in front of a mirror. What if after the Candyman legend died down, he took on a form to appease the younger generations? Perhaps a certain famous singer you know as Nicki Minaj??

But he couldn't forget about his Erik-like meeting with Helen Lyle from the original movie, so he decided to reference it in a catchy song.

There's even more evidence that I haven't included yet. When was the original Candyman movie released again? 1992. When was Beez In The Trap released? 2012. Who did 'Nicki Minaj' collab with in that song? 2 Chainz. What age range was Daniel when he died? His 20s. Who else was in their 20s when Beez In The Trap came out? Sally Super Bass herself. The amount of times the number 2 is mentioned makes me believe this is no mere coincidence, and Nicki Minaj has been lying to us all.

My mother laughs at me. She calls me a "Feckin' eejit". Says I'm on a "little baby high", but I'm no fool. I know deep down in my soul that this isn't just some theory, and that Onika Tanya Maraj-Petty is lying to us all.

Don't believe me if you want. I don't care. But when Anaconda Annie reveals her true identity and kills us all, I'll be prepared. And I will laugh in the faces of those foolish enough to ignore my warnings.

[gearboy-ghostz]

American Producer: "Wow, this series from the UK is really entertaining. The comedy and characters are great too!"

American Producer 2: "Yeah, totally. We should probably contact some of the people involved in the making of it, right? They could help us come up with a super entertaining show of our own."

American Producer: "....Cool idea. How about we just take the original show and make it worse, though?"