Genshin Impact Memes

I post and reblog memes to feed my gi hunger

[genshin-impact-memes]

Childe: I invited you into the woods because I crave the most dangerous game.

Traveler: Knife Monopoly?

Childe:

Childe: I was actually going to hunt you for sport but now I’m interested in whatever the fuck knife Monopoly is.

[genshin-impact-memes]

“The quickest way to a man’s heart is through the fourth and fifth ribs.”

- Probably Sara @ Itto

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“Whatever doesn’t kill me better start running.”

- Diluc and Xiao

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Aether: Since we are going on this big trip, Zhongli wants us to go over a few safety procedures.

Zhongli: Now, if I get shot, what do you do?

Xiao, solemnly: Avenge you

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Childe: *Smiling fondly* You’re so cute

Zhongli: Nonsense

Zhongli: *jumping from leaf to leaf to see which ones are crunchy for purely scientific reasons*

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Lumine: Did it hurt?

Xiao: yes

Lumine: Wait you didn’t even let me get to the “when you fell from heaven” part.

Xiao: everything hurts

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Paimon: Some people are like slinkies

Lumine: explain...?

Paimon: Not really good for much but makes you crack a smile when you push it down the stairs.

Lumine: Please don’t push Childe down the stairs.

Paimon: You can’t stop me

[genshin-impact-memes]

Kaeya: If you kill someone in a living room, can you still call it a living room?

Lumine: No, go to sleep

Kaeya: who delivers the mailman’s mail?

Lumine: I love you and all but please go to sleep.

Kaeya:

Lumine:

Kaeya: If a kid is bad and wants coal, what does Santa do?

Lumine: If I didn’t love you, I would kill you

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Diluc: fuck I want to die

Jean: Language!

Diluc: heckity hecc I crave death

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Lumine: *almost crying while petting two dogs, cooing at them being babie*

Dog Owner: They don’t understand you.

Lumine: Razor, you need to tell them they’re good boys. I cant tell them, Razor, they need to know. Tell them I love them? Please?

Razor: *fights a smile* wOOf WOOF bARK BARk

[genshin-impact-memes]

Plan A Didn’t Work

Lumine: So are we going to Plan B?

Ningguang: Technically, that would be Plan G.

Ganyu: How many plans do we have? Is there like, a plan M?

Keqing: Yeah, but Xiao disappears in Plan M.

Xiao: I like Plan M

Lumine: Xiao NO

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Zhongli: What’s a six letter word for disappointment?

Lumine: Childe

Childe:

Zhongli: ...

Zhongli: It fits!

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Childe: Guess what I’m about to get

Scaramouche: on my fucking nerves

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“I put the sass in assassin.”

- Childe

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Lisa: One day you could be a mom.

Lumine: One day? I am a mom.

Lisa: Razor doesn’t count.

Lumine, slamming her hands on the table: He is MY SON!

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Xiao: Honestly, I’m just so evil. So full of darkness. I strike fear into—

Lumine: You sleep with a stuffed giraffe

Xiao: he is my SeConD IN COMMAND IN MY ARMY OF DARKNESS

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Klee: Hey Diluc, can I go get some candy?

Diluc: what did Kaeya say?

Klee: no

Diluc: then why do you think I’ll let you?

Klee: Because Kaeya’s not the boss of you.

Diluc, internally: it’s a trap it’s a trap it’s a trap