No, you are so right, Neil, what's a little murder in this economy?

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@genuinely-distressed
No, you are so right, Neil, what's a little murder in this economy?
Artificial Condition is really like
Murderbot: I'm just an innocent bot hitchhiker, definitely not a serial killer
ART: Yeah, it would be weird for there to be two serial killers on this transport :)
wow this sucks so bad we ought [remembers that thou mustn't abidicate, as thy cousin Idra would be dead within the year] bridge the Istandaärtha
The Goblin Emperor is set in a pre-steampunk society because if it was set in a modern society, Csevet would have Excel and would become Too Powerful.
I get why The Goblin Emperor is people's 500 page court intrigue comfort read now. It's the fantasy of having greatness thrust on you and rising to the occasion. It's the fantasy of tipping the scales by being so resolutely kind and good all the time. It's the alienation and loneliness everybody feels at 18 made undeniable, and then slowly lessened. It's also the fantasy of having a very competent secretary
girl help why are there so many christians in my notes
Truly the worst damage the murderbot tv show did was make people start drawing secunit as a blond white dude
Okay I haven't seen anyone else share these on tumblr in HD soooo... just in case, I'm providing for the people 👀 (Courtesy of Pacat's website)
Tumblr will compress them, so if you want to make sure you get them in the highest quality possible, you can download them on Drive here!
Art by @/littleulvar, from the Polish editions
THIS PIECE OF SHIT. WAS TRAVERSING THE HALLS OF YOUR PALACE COMPLETELY UNSEEN BEFORE YOU'VE EVEN STEPPED A FOOT IN THERE. HE KNOWS THE HALLS BETTER THAN YOU. ARE YOU ALL SUFFERING FROM MASS AMNESIA?
RIGHT??? AND HE WAS DOING THAT BEFORE HE WAS EVEN ALLOWED TO BE THERE
kaz being unable to fathom fathers disliking their children is so funny to me. this man has literally ended people’s lives, but his father was good, jesper’s father is good, inej’s father is good, and even pekka rollins is a good father, so surely wylan was being dramatic? kaz was so sure fathers had to love their kids that he bet on it (and lost! because jan van eck truly did despise wylan, and kaz was blown away)
It is so hard for me to shill the Tarot Sequence on tumblr because one of the things in the books that makes me the most insane is also the BIGGEST plot twist in the series so far and I absolutely do NOT want to spoil anyone. So instead I sit here gnawing on it.
It's like,
What if you had two men—the heir scion to a disgraced magical throne and his human bodyguard? What if they were bonded in infancy so that they felt each other's emotions and always knew where the other was? What if they were raised together as friends, as brothers, as companions? What if they were the sole survivors of an attack when they were teenagers that destroyed their court and left the scion nearly dead—what if the bodyguard thought he failed to save him when that couldn't be further from the truth? What if they spent two decades with no one but each other to care about them? What if they were partners? What if they loved each other so deeply that they'd do anything to protect the other, even if it meant [REDACTED FOR SPOILERS]? What if they hated that the other was willing to die for him? What if—
Like, you can probably not even begin to understand the significance of what I've redacted without reading the first three books. I cannot tell you how absolutely insane I go over it.
Two fully grown men could not manage to kill Wylan, a sixteen-year-old boy, while they were alone on a boat with no one around to help him and people still treat him as if he's a helpless baby.
imagining society if people understood and recognised that wylan can be a genuinely sweet, quiet, caring person AND be dangerous, powerful, and threatening because he’s complex and not a flat one-sided badly written character
the crows are so young. they're so young. they make fun of wylan for playing the flute and being a bad criminal. they love waffles. they mock kaz's bad haircut. matthias mentally addresses kaz only with insults for nearly the whole two books. they have all been jealous of each other showing other people attention at some point -- jesper is jealous of anyone kaz gives attention to. matthias is jealous of anyone nina gives attention to. kaz is jealous of how comfortable the others are with each other. wylan is jealous of kuwei flirting with jesper -- they're all insecure at some point. nina gets mad at them for eating her cookies. they're all horny and fantasize about their crushes while actively running for their lives. they all want to kill the woman they kidnapped because she's whiny. they tease inej for sounding philosophical. they have secret hand signals. jesper and nina make sex jokes all the time and love to make others blush. they spite each other. they threatened to tattletale on each other to each other. they compete over who has the biggest bounty on his head. inej uses "being a matthias" as an insult. kaz and jesper have a physical scrap and have to be pulled apart by an Adult. i adore them so much
say what you will about leigh bardugo's worldbuilding choices but "guy who's hiding his superpowers is so constantly understimulated he developed a gambling addiction to cope" is fucking brilliant actually
Things we (me) are forgetting about Six of crows, not in order:
• There were rumours that Wylan was caught in an affair with his tutor
• Inej killed rinca moten (the desert lizard) that Matthias claimed he never seen being defeated before. She did it in few seconds too
• Jesper and Nina had chloropellets that they used to put other prisoners to sleep stitched under their skin. And had to cut them out to use them
• Matthias had a buzzcut for whole two books and half; also, half of SoC he had brown hair and brown eyes tailored
• Kaz had lockpicks and bloody explosives swallowed for the entirety of heist, and had to regurgitate them every other hour
• When Nina was young, she wanted to go to Fjerda as an avenging warrior or a spy (foreshadowing, I guess)
• Inej used Kaz's gloves to climb in the incenerator scene
• After learning Inej's real name, Kaz asked if that's what she preferred to be called
•Kaz's pov has shown that he probably had fracture or other injury from when he jumped while carrying Inej in his arms, and it was never mentioned him getting any medical attention. My boy been running this heist like this, AND without his cane for hours
• They blew up the nation's holy magical tree (somehow I keep forgetting this part)
• Matthias gave Kaz an agressive CPR until Nina took over. So his heart probably stopped during heist? (Somebody just give him a vacation or something)
•Nina flirts/ed with Kaz (as he had mentioned himself, she just loves flirting with everybody and everything)
•Inej seems to be the ONLY one in the Dregs without their tattoo
•Matthias labeled Inej as a demon in his head as well, not only Kaz
•Matthias' middle name is Benedik. I think only his and Jesper's second names were revealed (very likely that they are the only ones who have them)
•Kaz gave Matthias the "you wouldn't last an hour in the asylum where they raised me" talk (like, literally)
•“You can’t spend his money if you’re dead.”
“I’ll acquire expensive habits in the afterlife.”
•Inej thought that Kaz "at least owes me his best imitation of a human being".
•Wylan was standing up to Kaz several times, even at times when others wouldn't (like right after the Oomen incident)
•Matthias has the coolest nicknames for everybody in general
•Kaz kinda thinks more of Inej than others do? Has more faith in her and how strong she is, if you will
•Kaz went back for the Black Tips after Inej was injured and "there was enough blood to paint a barn red" (reminder that he still has a fracture after running with her in his hands and jumping off great heightswhile carrying her)
•Tolya was mentioned in SoC ("There’s a Heartrender at the Little Palace who can recite epic poetry for hours. Then you’d wish you had died.”)
•Matthias thanked Inej personally for being the reason they made it out of the harbor alive (that's right, everybody must respect Inej)
•Kaz wants reassurance that Inej believes in him once in a while
•Everybody feels kinda good about sharing secrets with Kaz cuz he's Dirtyhands and he wouldn't judge anything
•Kaz and Inej have a series of silent signals?
•Kaz said "You don't want a look at what's inside my head, Nina dear" while wearing fucking dumb goggles
•Inej is the only sacred thing in Kaz's life, and she made him feel like a boy still believing in existence of magic
honestly kinda love the fact that inej and jesper both had a crush on kaz, and instead of their friendship being strained(or god forbid a love triangle) bc of it, there was just a conversation like “damn, we both got terrible taste”