& South is not Down

Dramatique Dinner Guest, Fandom Muse & General Enthusiast // Officially in my 30s I guess

[fractally]

I enjoy proximity (same team, etc) pining but I can't buy those set ups for Hollanov because I simply do not believe any versions of their characters that don't fuck immediately. If Shane and Ilya are in the same room for any length of time they're fucking. Doesn't matter what else is going on. They are incapable of not fucking each other if they're in the same place

[northisnotup]

do you play or follow any sports? & elaborate on that?

Thank you! ♡ I am a hockey fan for my sins, and the sins of my ancestors, of which there are many.

I also got into watching baseball with my dad last world series, and I enjoy watching rugby, volleyball, and soccer live as well!

I am defo not as active as I should be, considering I worked with physical therapists for 7 years and know how important movement is...

[northisnotup]

What movie have you watched most recently? What did you think of it?

The Sheep Detectives was better than it had ANY right to be. Cannot believe a movie about CGI sheep trying to solve a murder & coming to terms with death got my heartstrings like that

[dumbpuppyfag]

UNGRATEFUL tech companies are saying things like "turn off your ad blocker" and "we need your photo id" instead of "thank you so much for not just pirating our shit, youre so handsome"

[serpientes]

[hms-no-fun]

it's cool that they're letting porn on this website again

[sesamie]

simple asks to help bolster ask culture again

What's your blog title from?

What movie have you watched most recently? What did you think of it?

what are you looking forward to right now?

if you could do anything at all today, what would it be?

What's your drink of choice? (Coffee/tea order, alcohol of choice, pop, etc)

What's your hair routine like? Anything special?

what's your favorite way to travel? Is there a mode of travel you haven't done that you want to experience?

favorite month of the year and why?

favorite time of day and why?

do you play or follow any sports? & elaborate on that?

what kind of music is stuck in your head a lot lately?

dishes or laundry?

what's something you learned recently?

if you could give a TED talk on anything, what would you talk about?

What's a piece of advice you find yourself giving a lot?

what's a piece of advice you would give to yourself five years ago?

do you believe in luck and superstition? Do you carry any lucky items or follow any lucky rules?

Are you musical? Play any instruments or sing? Would you ever perform for an audience?

Write, type, or speak?

what do you wish someone would ask you?

[penandinkprincess]

Okay, so with the Spaghetti verse - I've put this out there before but I think you'd get a kick out of it.

Shane gets the call to foster not a fuck-off big snake, but a hognose - which the females top out at 36 inches. So Ilya hears this and is like "okay, yeah, a small snake (still big to him, but small compared to spaghetti)" only to face absolute betrayal at how spicy (dramatic) they are because "Why is he angry Shane?! Spaghetti isn't angry!:

it starts doing a rattelsnake impression at him and ilya is straight offended

he is just STANDING HERE

man learns a new appreciation for spaghetti because this new guy is an ASSHOLE

[penandinkprincess]

ilya stops by to look at the snakes each day because he treats it like allergy training and doesn't want to lose any tolerance he's built up, but this means anyone listening in while visiting just hears, "good morning, spaghetti. you are looking very scaly today. and mouse lump is almost gone! good work. good disgestion. hello sad dead linguini. so sad you are dead aga-oh? alive? no, dead again. back to dead. okay. good job everyone. maybe tomorrow you are alive, linguini. we will see."

[opalsiren]

a lesser-discussed fucked up thing about ai is how the sparkly symbol is used to represent ai features on apps and the like. we should never have let them take the sparkle from us. like that's OURS

[luckydicekirby]

sometimes a fic can just be about the age old question 'how emotionally bad for everyone involved can a threesome be when they all did in fact agree to be there'

[kurtwagnermorelikekurtwagnerd]

sickens me to my stomach. how dare this guy get to live my dream.

[acutelathos]

Some clarifications and an update

[biglawbear]

This person has more emotional intelligence and healthier skills in navigating relationships than most people

[darkaviarymc]

Tragedy alignment chart. Feel free to use, but please reblog if you do.

[greenmossloveisreal1998iloveyou]

you should be addicted to shutting the fuck up

You wanna fuck me so bad it makes you look stupid

[whyenn-reader]

[yorgen-sh]

The Chinese shoe manufacturer decided to demonstrate the indestructibility of their shoes

[scarlettohairdye]

And also the indestructibility of that woman's ankles

[argillaforma]

can we talk about ilya’s love for sucking cock. and while we’re at it can we also talk about how he swallows every time

[notahungrywish]

Notable that in the books (ignoring the weird racial undertones) he is OBSESSED with Shane’s balls. Like has odes to Shane’s balls running as a monologue in his head.

Ilya Rozanov obsessed with #cock and balls and swallowing huge loads also CONFIRMED

[northisnotup]

Tags by @persimmony-snicket are not to be missed 🥵

[amanitamoment]

I just know baby Shane loved roughhousing with David. David would throw that little chonk around and around and he would just giggle and say "again! again!"

[cherryhatter-deactivated2015072]

KICK THE CAN!

Let’s play the biggest game of kick the can on the internet.

To kick the can, reblog it. I wanna see how long this can go on for.

[visibun]

the oldest reblogs for this post that i can find are from january 2nd of 2013. this can has been getting kicked around tumblr for almost 13½ years now

[drtanner]

And yet somehow this is my first time kicking it!

[bugslibraryy]

Hallooo

Okay so idk I’m back in my a/b/o bag again idk why. Anyway ! Pretty canon right like all the same but omega Shane alpha Ilya. They are hooking up casually, and it’s fun and hot but it’s clean, so clean. They are ! Careful ! No biting, scenting but only during sex and strictly never ever any sex around heat/rut. Not even the week before their scheduled times off to have them if it overlaps with the times they are playing against each other.

Anyway. It’s pre tuna melt, like close to it- maybe a month or two before and Ilya is in rut. He’s out for a week, Shane notices, his absence from his games- “rut leave” their texts silent.

Shane can’t help it but he’s been thinking more and more and more about what Ilya’s ruts look like, who he spends then with, if he spends it alone, if he does spend it alone- does he have toys he likes to use, what ones, what does he think about. Does it ache like Shane’s heats do- does he feel cold and lonely after unsatisfying fake satiating with toys that imitate knotting. Does he crave the feeling of a warm body with him. Does it draw out, body desperate to mate, string out every opportunity for it to happen. Does he enjoy them, feel powerful and strong, in control, more himself in rut- he’s heard it’s like that for some. 

Ok and so Shane’s tucked up in bed one night, half asleep as he keeps his eyes open to catch the last of his chapter.

And then his phone rings- and it’s, it’s Lily ?. Worry and thrill shivers in his gut, and he bites at his lip, lets it ring out a few more times. his mind races, calculates that Ilyas ruts must be short, wonders what on earth he might want. Shane couldn’t stop himself from knowing, from needing to know. He always needed to know with Rozanov, it was undeniable to him somehow. He swears, snatches his phone up, presses answer and cradles it to his ear.

“Rozanov?” He asks when the line is quiet for more than five seconds. Then, a hot panting breath, a slick wet sound that makes goosebumps prickle up over the back of his neck, heat turn in his stomach and then- then the slick sound again, again, another heavy pant low through the phone.

Shane almost swallows his tongue.

“Rozanov?” He says again, but his voice is dry and catching and soft through the phone and it’s answered with a low rumble, one that makes Shane’s chest twinge.

“Shchenok” the foreign word makes him frown, and he makes a soft questioning sound.

“What, what do you want?” Shane asks, fingers reach up to pinch at his bottom lip, chest hot and tight at the desperate sound of Ilya’s breathing.

“Puppy” he translates and the nickname makes Shane’s lips part, his cock throb and start to fill. Heat a dark rush on his cheeks.

Puppy. The one thing they let slip. Rozanov said it sparingly, often in the depth of orgasm, when his knot was securing inside Shane, cum filling the condom.

“Rozanov- I. What’s? What’s going on” he swallows around the whine fighting up his throat, the way it makes his eyelids go heavy, think of the way Rozanov usually says it to him. “My puppy” “good puppy” “going to fill you puppy” “feel so fucking good puppy” against his ear right in the peak of his orgasm.

“Where are you puppy?” Ilya sounds drunk, words slurred and soft, mumbled.

“At home” Shane answers, flat and honest.

Ilya whines, a sad sound in the phone, a sound Shane has never heard the alpha make before.

“Need you” Ilya exhales, and then he cuts into rambling Russian, the slick sound picking up.

Shane is listening shamelessly, phone pressed to his ear and fucking Rozanov is calling him in his rut? Shane scrubs a hand over his eyes. Things with them are already so impossible. So- so. Shane sighs and hears Ilya let out a small moan.

“Come here. I have my knot. For you, puppy, to fill” his words are stilted, accent so thick- like when Shane first met him all those years ago, he sounds far away- out of it- high.

“I can’t” Shane answers, swallows hard. “I’m hours away Rozanov, it’s your rut, we- we can’t” he exhales, shakes his head, trying to tell himself that. They can’t.

Ilya growls. And the sound makes Shane bite back a whine, shove his fist again his mouth.

“don’t want?” Ilya asks and it’s a taunt, it’s horrible, it makes Shane’s stomach ache. The wet sound of Ilya working himself is quicker, messier and Shane thinks of Ilya’s hand around his cock, of him fitting a toy over his pretty thick cock, of pushing his knot into it.

Ilya starts whining in Shane’s silence, a low horrible sound that makes anxiety twist in his stomach. That makes him want to go to him. To make it feel better.

“No- it’s not that” Shane confesses, sure that Ilya won’t remember this anyway- must have been in some thick haze to have even called him in the first place. They had their rules, this was breaking one, clear and obvious.

“Why” Ilya grunts and Shane exhales hard, drops his head and presses his fingers firm into his eyelids.

“It’s. Rozanov I’m in Montreal, you’re in Boston. I can’t get there”

“Fuck” Ilya grunts low and angry and more Russian, jumbled words that Shane can’t follow but they sound so pretty, even if they are garbled and frustrated.

“It. hurts” Ilya grits out. “Won’t. Won’t stop” he huffs.

Shane is so hard he might die and his head is spinning and he feels starving and dizzy and he fuck- he’s so fucking wet, he can feel it between his legs, messy and slick.

“Keep making knot” Ilya continues. “Knot for puppy” he croons and Shane almost drops the phone, bites down so hard into his own fingers they throb.

“I just want. Fucking need to- I Want” Ilya rambles Shane interjects, nervous of the end of the sentence.

“Give me your knot then, alpha, please, it’ll make it better okay? Let me hear you” Shane asks, heart thundering in his chest wild and rampant.

Ilya croons, mumbles a “yes yes” before it’s slurred and spacey Russian, words Shane doesn’t know.

Shane feels his own cock pulse and he pictures Ilya there, over him, mindless. His need desperate as he ruts inside of Shane, hands and mouth pulling at him biting him, pinning him on his knees, presented up to his alpha.

Fuck. Shane’s hands might be shaking.

“Please alpha it will be better if you cum, if you give me your knot yeah? It’ll feel all better” Shane says in a soft tone, clenches his thighs and relaxes them, squirms at the hard throb of his cock pushing against his sweats.

“Please” Shane says again and Ilya cums then, a harsh desperate whine, shaky moan that draws out and leaves Shane feeling raw, chest cracked open. So so wet oh god fucking wet it’s dripping down the backs of his thighs.

Ilya goes fuzzy in the line then, almost complete Russian, happy croons and a few sad sounds, ruffles of sheets, fabric. One soft utterance of “puppy” before Ilya falls asleep. Shane’s hand is numb wrapped hard around the phone, legs heavy and mind reeling. He hangs up when he can make himself, fits a hand around his cock over his cock and comes in three squeezes of it, making the mess inside his sweats even worse.

Shane can only hope Ilya was as faded in his rut as he seemed to be, that he won’t remember it. What Shane said.

Shane is relived when Ilya sends him a normal out of the blue text two days later, no mention of the call at all.