Welcome To My Collection

I just think they’re neat :)

[dogpuppy]

[cottoncandylesbo]

[simplyjustfucked]

[counterpick-me-irl]

SEIS fag sex? En esta economia?

[randomalistic]

Selfshippers who ship with weird/unappealing characters. I love you. Like hell yeah you go get with Mr Crocker. Go get with lord faarquad

[randomalistic]

Rare occasion where twitter elevates something beautiful

[gravityjunior]

Smh you guys can't just leave out this amazing addition that op made

[autofuneral]

one of those apocalyptic things that we have decided not to talk about is that straight guys do not wash their hands in the bathroom. its fucking crazy pills man.

[mxmuffin]

I love this gif. Me when I need my stool

[mon3trs]

in space no one can hear you moan like a girl

[fat-fuck-hairy-belly]

Ground control here, we can hear you just fine

[oneheadtoanother]

[islamprotestan-blog]

only 5 seconds

[zanyflowerpizzatrash]

i wasn't ready for that..lol

[suffer-no-humiliation]

Immediately recognized that look

[goldensunset]

[nemesis-is-my-middle-name]

my farming sim game will have animal butchery as a normalized part of the gameplay loop to act as a lightning rod to draw all the discourse and thinkpieces away from topics that would annoy me more

[nemesis-is-my-middle-name]

in my farming sim game that has animal butchery as a normalized part of the gameplay loop, shipped products will be sold on a weekly basis, not a daily one. you get a big windfall once a week and then you budget around that. if you want more money in the interim you have to go sell to the local merchants whatever products they specialize in.

[nemesis-is-my-middle-name]

in my farming sim game, getting married to one of the townspeople will have a significant impact on your gameplay. if you marry the rival farmer, their smaller farm will be merged with yours. if you marry the town alchemist/doctor you get a buff to all your alchemy and you wake up from getting knocked out in your own home instead of their clinic. if you marry the priestess she uh, idk she does weather related divine magic for you so you can choose the weather, idk i haven't thought too hard about that one yet

[nemesis-is-my-middle-name]

my farming sim game will have a MILF you can actually F

[nemesis-is-my-middle-name]

these tags are probably a joke but genuinely i do think that more games with romance candidates in general should require you to at least be on friendly terms with their family/close friends before they will romance/marry you. so yes. romancing the MILF will require attending her kid's pretend tea party first. to prove you mean business

[phaeton-flier]

Bear religion probably fucking rocks. You're a fucking bear, you're the deadliest thing on earth, once a year an endless supply of salmon just flings itself up the river to gorge on and then you nap for 3 months.

[phaeton-flier]

The most delicious food in the world is protected by tiny demons who can defend it from everyone except you. Your natural armor is thick enough that you can just eat the damn hive while they buzz around you. God's chosen animals right there

[theaudientvoid]

[centrally-unplanned]

Regular bears tell stories of angel bears sent by the Bear God, pure white and twice as strong as any normal bear could be, who rule the summit of the Earth and kill all who stand in their path.

And they are right, those bears exist and totally do that. Humans just have fake angels as a cope.

[theabigailthorn]

love the idea of bears being the chosen species actually. having a near death experience and glimpsing heaven and realising it's just full of bears, no humans at all, humans not ensouled actually, humans an accidental byproduct of God's plan for bears

[moonshynecybin]

have you guys ever seen a crocodile with its fingies out

[moonshynecybin]

[devilishdescent]

[magicratfingers]

[dogpuppy]

I’m panicking why are the Swedish talking about me

[prokopetz]

"Isn't it weird that [thing humans commonly eat] is poisonous to literally every domesticated animal" I mean, there's a pretty good chance that [thing humans commonly eat] is at least mildly poisonous to humans, too. One of our quirks as a species is that we think our food is bland if it doesn't have enough poison in it.

[xeansicemane]

Humans have a really weird mix of mundane superpowers.

We're not fast and don't have a lot of natural weaponry but we're bizarrely tolerant to a broad range of toxins to the point that one toxin is considered a morning necessity for some to perform at work. Gotta love us.

[vexwerewolf]

[missmacfire]

[hamkittens]

[smeared1992]

you used to be able to get a job just by circling a listing in a newspaper in red pen

[rneliflua]

The last play I watched before the pandemic was a Beauty And The Beast adaptation and when Gaston proposed to Belle there was this little boy in the audience who yelled NOOO DON’T SAY YES, so when Belle naturally turned him down Gaston turned to the boy with his hands on his hips and said “well, now look what you’ve done”  

[alkthash]

#no one breaks the fourth wall like gaston

[achillesinhighheels]

unfortunately i do believe that every time i delay watching a film it’s because it’s going to find me at the perfect time