hockey is the gayest sport

shhh I'm trying to manifest a Check, Please! TV show! this blog is more Heated Rivalry than anything else, but I just drop all my fandom stuff here so there will be PWHL, One Piece, Murderbot, Project Hail Mary, Ted Lasso, Deadloch, Stranger Things, and whatever else I'm feeling at the moment. millennial. gender fluid, any pronouns. Autistic. RiverCityBlueKitty on AO3.

[padchai]

Me and my mutuals when we enter any fandom:

[ilyushkalyublyu]

Let's remember that this is who these sweet 25-year-old babies are and be really nice to them:

Because truly, they are a force for good. 💖

[goldenrodvulture]

When Arthur is finally done breast feeding, Jackie decides that she'd really like to celebrate by getting drunker than she's ever been before. Shane says that since it's summer and the season is over, he'd be down to join the party. But of course the Pikes still have three small children and they're TIRED so instead of going out or having a big to-do, it's just Jackie, Hayden, and Shane drinking ungodly amounts in the backyard one evening, hoping the kids stay in bed.

At some point, several hours into the binge, Jackie jokes that the reason she got pregnant again was that she's never figured out how to give good head. Shane, too drunk to remember that it's "weird" to info dump about the things that he's researched extensively and figured out how to do well, is three minutes into giving advice before he stops to think about the subject matter.

[goldenrodvulture]

Jackie tells him that it's easy enough to talk about but much harder to DO, which activates competition mode in Shane's brain so then he has to go to search the fridge for a cucumber or zucchini

[goldenrodvulture]

Completely coincidentally, Amber is conceived that very night

[vulpes-aestatis]

Baby sphinx trying to be like mama and waylaying travelers, but all its riddles are completely non-sensical like the ones a 1st grader would tell

[thecactifindahome]

[cygnesurglace]

MC Hollanov Fic Rec: Muscle Memory

By sillyteehee | Rating: E

“I’m trying to figure out,” Rose wonders aloud. “Are you always a complete prick? Just with women? Or just when you lose a game?” Ilya barks a laugh, shocked and almost delighted, and his smile spreads wide enough that Rose can see all those pearly whites of his that are so much nicer than she expected any hockey player’s to be. “All the time,” he grins, “all the time. However much of an asshole Hollander has told you I am, double it.” She answers truthfully, shrugs her shoulders in her tiny silver dress. “He hasn’t mentioned you at all.”

After a shitshow of an evening in a Montreal nightclub, Ilya wakes up the next morning in Shane’s bed. Only, he’s not in Shane’s bed — Rose Landry is, and he’s in Rose Landry’s body, and she’s in his. Well, what the fuck are they supposed to do with that?

Read it on AO3 here

[totearup]

Honestly I think Shane forgives Ilya for the 2014 ghosting because Shane knows that if his Olympic team had fucked up that badly on home ice he would also have wanted to crawl into a hole and speak to no one ever again.

If the Canadian team had lost to Latvia and fallen out of medal contention before even the elimination rounds, Shane Hollander would have done way worse things than snap at Rozanov and ignore him for five months. Things might have been lit on fire.

[minyard-05]

don't let being born a girl stop you from being the man your father never was

[mutinsfromthemoon]

ilya jolted awake in the middle of the night drenched in sweat, waking up shane as well worried and asking while massaging ilya’s back “ilya, is everything okay?” and ilya looks at his husband, pale and panting “i had a nightmare that rose didn’t clock that you’re gay and you two got married” and shane just stares at him for a second before bursting out laughing and pulling ilya back down into his arms, still shaking with laughter and ilya just whines against his chest “it’s not funny shane, it was terrifying”

then somewhere in LA there’s a rose landry having a fantastic dream where she’s pegging shane

[corantus]

locked the fuck in get my money up

[skoomabong]

[ok-notgood-probablybad]

I hope they never figure anything out

[military-newsboys]

Ilya: Can you believe some people see Shane and aren’t immediately filled with absolute unconditional love for him? Ilya: They don’t even get the urge to kiss him right there. That’s incomprehensible to me.

[ilya-sweetheart]

Bood: did you know our rook has a girlfriend?

Ilya: haas? my son — he is dating and not telling me?

Bood: yea, he keeps texting this girl Marlene and blushing

meanwhile in boston

St-Simmons: hey cap, how’s Lucy?”

Marley: missing my dick as always, fuck off simmy

[actuallysara]

this. in season 2. or else.

[amiyayuri]

@letsgotomato11

Summer Fun <3

[yinza]

It occurred to me that I'd never actually drawn these two together, so I decided fixing that would be a good way to end Pride Month.

[Image Description: Digital artwork of Xena and Gabrielle, shown from the waist up. Xena wears her standard armor, while Gabrielle has her short hair and red-and-brown outfit from Season 5. Xena is dipping Gabrielle in a kiss, and Gabrielle has one hand cupping the back of Xena's head while the other is flung across her shoulders. /end ID]

[flyora]

shall I add a description here?

[veldrin]

Shetland pony and lesbian giraffe