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professional womanblogger

[doctorcurdlejr]

I can be normal about things. Don't look at my blog.

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[beleester]

>#I love how this gag would be funny at any point since the third century BCE

[perkwunos]

The Johnny Appleseed they don’t want you to know about

[bigfuckingcrab]

[implicxtdawn]

There’s no better journal than tumblr drafts

[vhen-harel]

[thelambliesdown1974]

Old men type out their will and testament in Simon and Garfunkel YouTube comment section

[dogdeerbones]

i am so . forgets what i was going to say and starts sobbing and banging my head against the wall

[nextlevelsmp3]

[escapedaudios]

When I was a little boy, girls used to just do random cartwheels for no reason. Then one day, they stopped. Now that I am a man, no women randomly do cartwheels. This is because society is evil and killed the cartwheel impulse in their soul. They don't even spin horizontally anymore. It's fucked up.

[what-even-is-thiss]

You should be able to adopt adults for inheritance purposes like in Ancient Rome. Yeah this is Cathy the 23 year old and she’s my daughter now. She has my last name. When I die she inherits the tire shop.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Cathy will bring glory and dignitas to this America’s Tire franchise location just as I and my father did before her.

[leforetenchante]

Spring wildflowers in a Canadian mountain meadow

[newtypezaku]

Big mood

[h-isforhome]

the concept of my sister calling our mom 'mom' (bc we NEVER do that even though we only speak english) is killing me so baddddddd

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

starting the countdown until gaylors start saying that Adam Sandler officiating Taylor's wedding (sorry if this is how you found out) is actually proof that it's a sham because it's a reference to I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry (2007), in which Sandler and Kevin James play heterosexual men who enter a mutually beneficial fake gay marriage, a dynamic that Taylor is inverting as a queer woman pretending to be straight while cleverly flagging the obvious farce to those with the eyes to see

[vamptits]

is Travis gay as well or is he oblivious to her awesome and undeniable subversions of heterosexual marriage. just so I can get a grasp on the situation and all

[pjackk]

Beware The Bitches That Be like Dot Dot Dot Before They SAy Shit

[apricops]

*trying to pitch public transportation to Americans* it’s like a legal form of texting while driving

[patrickbatemanamericanpsycho]