ヘイリー

One apathetic med student to rule them all

[rawrda]

This is your daily reminder to not be ashamed of making your life easy for yourself.

Cut your food into small pieces, make the font size 30 on your e book, use straws to drink, get a pen that’s comfortable to hold, take more naps, walk slowly, eat another cookie, buy velcro shoes, re-watch the part you couldn’t understand the first time, write things on your hands so you don’t forget it… whatever you want and/or need

Don’t let anyone tell you how you should be doing things. We don’t need to prove each other anything

[rylandsgrace]

I hate everyone

[stargiirl27]

toxic mothers are wild they'll really be like "I never said that" like ma'am yes you did cause it's been ingrained in my head since I was twelve

[nedsseveredhead]

My dad fell asleep watching some youtube video in the living room but his youtube is set to auto play and i just heard ‘Big foot mating call’ before the loudest guttural noise imaginable reverberated this whole house. And hes still asleep

[nedsseveredhead]

Step mom came out from her room and was like ‘Hey Jim? Why?’

[nedsseveredhead]

if this somehow makes it to a facebook meme page and my dad sees it i will literally never forgive any of you

[songsofwaterandnight]

Op, do you see the connection between the bigfoot mating call and your stepmom coming out of her room right after or-

[srsfunny]

An Idea To Prevent A Nuclear War

[pocketrunner]

“My suggestion was quite simple: Put that needed code number in a little capsule, and then implant that capsule right next to the heart of a volunteer. The volunteer would carry with him a big, heavy butcher knife as he accompanied the President. If ever the President wanted to fire nuclear weapons, the only way he could do so would be for him first, with his own hands, to kill one human being. The President says, “George, I’m sorry but tens of millions must die.” He has to look at someone and realize what death is—what an innocent death is. Blood on the White House carpet. It’s reality brought home.” - Richard Fisher, Bulletin of the Atomic Scientists (1981)

[north-bi-northwest]

Never forget that part of the reason this system was never implemented was that when he presented it to his colleagues, their response was IIRC “George, that’s terrible! If he has to take an innocent life, he may never press the button.”

[maeamian]

why would u leave this in the tags!

[narwhalsarefalling]

MY TA SHOT SOMEONE IN THE FOOT AND THE PROFESSOR WAS SO FUCKING QUICK LMAOOO

[narwhalsarefalling]

some context 

1. my TA, Ralph, shot his girlfriend’s abusive ex in the foot

2. abusive ex was also a sex offender

3. he shot him when ex came buy to pick some stuff up from girlfriend and tried to take some of Ralph’s items as well

4. ex is stable and alive in a hospital

5. i didn’t do assignment 8 so i am very happy

[narwhalsarefalling]

some more Facts About Ralph

he is whiter then snow. this man is pure 100% american redneck in everything but the politics. this is intimidating if you dont know him because he owns like 3 different guns but also has animated discussions about “how his sister should be able to get married” when you bring up lgbt rights. his sister isnt even gay or trans or anything, he just thinks that LGBT rights also means that the lady should propose when she wants to. hes a little confused but he got the spirit. upon finding out that i am queer he said, word for word “THATS FUCKING RADICAL HOMIE” 

in the first week of school he snorted a line of pepper in the cafeteria and threw up.

the only other crime hes committed before was accidently dropping a weight from his balcony and cracking the sidewalk. which is technically destruction of public property but the judge basically laughed at him and have him 10 hours of community service

this man once walked me home when i stayed late at the lab and talked to me animatedly about breeding brine shrimp for different lab purposes. absolutely captivated by this discussion. i trust him with my life

[larmalot]

oh mg god this post somehow got better

[if-i-am-not-for-me]

We love Ralph in this chemistry department

[were-ralph]

[langernameohnebedeutung]

Hamlet. Faustus. Frankenstein. Raskolnikov. Love how the "university turns people into depressed, feral, ahead of their times overthinkers"-thing is perpetual. College just does that to you. For centuries now.

[huffylemon]

[cursedgreendayimages]

the next time someone asks what this country is like i’ll just send them this

[leona-florianova]

-  Velký noční hlídač / Watchman

- author of the videomaping Milan Cais 

-photography ©ČTK,  ©David Peltán, MAFRA.

[swordandthread]

i solemnly swear i’m up to no good

[princesstigerbelle]

HOLY SHIT

[cybermax]

The Goblin is trying to get the shiny treasures that hang from the ceiling.

[tandembicycles]

@quantumghosts

[cryoverkiltmilk]

#how long do you think that cat has wanted to touch those shimmery orbs?#How long do you think it’s looked up at that light fixture and thought Someday or If only#But that day#Some human left a chair#right in the spot#and that cat#that magnificent chicken leg of an animal saw it’s opportunity#it carefully scaled that chair#it balanced on the tippy top#and it reached for it’s dreams

these are important tags

[insomniac-arrest]

classical art of the Icarus myth like

[erinlace-deactivated20200503]

[bone-and-brawn]

[official-lucifers-child]

no no that’s a bop, i love it

[flightyfinch]

“Woman!” cried I, somewhat tearsome,

“Who are you to stand so fearsome

With your wavy locks of auburn hair and eyes of emerald green?”

Quoth the woman, “I’m Jolene”

[dickwad-666]

finished toadbert's halloween costume

little wizard

[dickwad-666]

his cape has his name on it

[nuka-rockit]

[planetary-wolf]

this is so fucking funny

[fucktheflagandfuckyou]

LOOKS LIKE WERE HAVING A SLUMBER PARTY BOIS

[thesylverlining]

these are all wonderful but i must say having their model in a smart business suit is the best choice they could have made here

[bogleech]

You might think nerds and children are the biggest consumer base for pokemon merchandise, but here the biggest audience automatically defaults to Japanese salarymen and college students because these are also products you can hide from the world and fall asleep in.

[carnival-phantasm]

Interesting new lockpicking technique by the LockPickingLawyer

[mechanicalangel-deactivated2023]

ohh you misheard! im a paranormal INSTIGATOR. im here to CAUSE hauntings lol

[phoenix-carstairs]

Telling us not to wear a scarf is oppression you fucking fools let us wear whatever we want

[captioningposts]

[video id: tiktok posted by @/sfkhader where she switches between pretending to be two different people. the first person is a hijabi muslim who changes outfits several times; the second person is someone who is not a muslim.

person one, wearing a hoodie: "do you have a problem with my hoodie?"

person two: "umm, everyone wears hoodies."

person one, wearing a beanie: "okay, how about this beanie?"

person two: "ugh, beanies are so cute."

person one, wearing a headscarf: "okay, how about this scarf?"

person two: "those are so high fashion; i see them on runways all the time."

person one, removing the first headscarf to reveal a hijab: "okay perfect becau-"

person two, cutting person one off: "oh my god, why would you willingly cover up your hair like that? are you oppressed?"

end video id]

[netherworldpost]

Because I will never be able to eat lava… (I pause to look pleadingly at a volcanologist, they sternly, subtly shake their head no. It is clear this is an old, ongoing argument.) …. my prevailing theory is it has a texture of very thick honey.