eldritch lawn ornament

30s, they/she/he

[harrowitzer]

Intro post below the break.

They/she/it unknowable entity with too many teeth and tentacles and also a married parent in their late 30s.

Fandom blog: @bunsofhoney (Spideypool, Symbrock, some connected marvel fandoms and ships)

RP blog list here

Sometimes I find the energy to create things, mostly writing. The tags I use for OC posts and writing are on this post. I have a photo blog and a spicy blog, you can have them if we're mutuals.

Fic list:

Bioremediation: 4k, PWithP, Harlivy. Pam learns some things about Harley and helps her solve a long-standing problem.

Fifty First Dates: 6k, PwithP, Lokius. Loki seeks a little bit of comfort from Mobius, although he has to try a few times to get there. (part 1 of Some Kind of Science, Some Kind of Fiction)

Time Loops for Breakfast: 5k, rated G. Loki does something he probably shouldn't, involving a certain purveyor of personal watercraft. (part 2 of Some Kind of Science, Some Kind of Fiction)

All my other fics are Spideypool, which you can find on my alter-eggo waffle: @bunsofhoney

Original Work:

Last Rites: Southern gothic horror slash gay romance. Take True Detectives and throw in a racist Cthulhu cult and an avenging nature spirit trying to get them out of her swamp. WIP

Godless Deep: A solo spaceship pilot and her uninvited passenger, an alien symbiote. Space adventure/cosmic horror. WIP

[byjove]

if you adopt two dogs who are littermates, they will team up on you to undermine your authority. if you adopt two cats that are littermates, they will constantly try to narc on each other to you

[riotd]

do you ever get the irresistible urge to bash your head against a brick wall

[planet-motherfucker]

[evilwizard]

pitch for my new tarot card “Do Not Panic”

[godcon]

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[onecricket]

[proustiansleep]

"Obviously, there is also outright torture, people who are actually being shot, beaten, tortured, or violently abused. But I’m speaking here even of the ones that aren’t. For most, it’s as if the very texture of everyday life has been designed to be intolerable—only, in a way that you can never quite say is exactly a human rights violation. There’s never enough water. Showering requires almost military discipline. You can’t get a permit. You’re always standing in line. If something breaks it’s impossible to get permission to fix it. Or else you can’t get spare parts. There are four different bodies of law that might apply to any legal situation (Ottoman, British, Jordanian, Israeli), it’s anyone’s guess which court will say what applies where, or what document is required, or acceptable. Most rules are not even supposed to make sense. It can take eight hours to drive 20 kilometers to see your girlfriend, and doing so will almost certainly mean having machine guns waved in your faces and being shouted at in a language you half understand by people who think you’re subhuman. So you do most of your dalliance by phone. When you can afford the minutes. There are endless traffic jams before and after checkpoints and drivers bicker and curse and try not to take it out on one another. Everyone lives no more than 12 or 15 miles from the Mediterranean but even on the hottest day, it’s absolutely impossible to get to the beach. Unless you climb the wall, there are places you can do that; but then you can expect to be hunted every moment by security patrols. Of course teenagers do it anyway. But it means swimming is always accompanied by the fear of being shot. If you’re a trader, or a laborer, or a driver, or a tobacco farmer, or clerk, the very process of subsistence is continual stream of minor humiliations. Your tomatoes are held and left two days to rot while someone grins at you. You have to beg to get your child out of detention. And if you do go to beseech the guards, those same guards might arbitrarily decide to hold you to pressure him to confess to rock-throwing, and suddenly you are in a concrete cell without cigarettes. Your toilet backs up. And you realize: you’re going to have to live like this forever. There is no “political process.” It will never end. Barring some kind of divine intervention, you can expect to be facing exactly this sort of terror and absurdity for the rest of your natural life." —David Graeber, Hostile Intelligence: Reflections from a Visit to the West Bank

[indapitts]

my fav codependent roommates who are basically siblings

[sandersstudies]

Every 21st century piece of writing advice: Make us CARE about the character from page 1! Make us empathize with them! Make them interesting and different but still relatable and likable!

Every piece of classic literature: Hi. It's me. The bland everyman whose only purpose is to tell you this story. I have no actual personality. Here's the story of the time I encountered the worst people I ever met in my life. But first, ten pages of description about the place in which I met them.

[sandersstudies]

Modern writing advice: Yes your protagonist should have flaws but ultimately we should root for them and like them from the beginning :)

Charles Dickens: Here is the worst ugliest rudest meanest nastiest bitch you’ve ever met in your life.

[sandersstudies]

Modern writing advice: Make sure your POV character goes through a significant arc! Make sure they are changed by the narrative! Make sure they learn a lesson!

Narrators of every book of the 19th century: the lesson I learned is these people fucking suck, sayonara you freaks

[sandersstudies]

Modern writing advice: It’s all about the character overcoming obstacles and learning! They learn their lesson so they can fix their mistakes and make good choices in the future! It’s a character arc! It’s called growth! Readers love it!

Everyone from ancient times through the 19th century: would you like to watch a Guy fuck up twenty times in a row

[coldgoldlazarus]

[sonofnjobu]

Nappy.co

[cantbaretoknowinnocence]

You know how long I've been looking for something like this!?

[kny111]

To any sketch artist out there too.

[solarishashernoseinabook]

[Image ID: a black woman wearing a plaid shirt and red bandana around her head. Her braided hair is coming out of the top od her head and falling in front of her. Text says "Did you know there's a black-owned stock photo company nappy.co that provides stereotype-free images of black people" /end]

[dragonwolfcrane]

the other day i was trying to find reference images of black people for art things but all i was finding were black-and-white images of white people! love this!!

[sonofnjobu]

Also! They accept submissions. If you’re a photographer and want to contribute, the button is on the bottom left of the webpage. 

[ao3-shenanigans]

Aw heck yeah!!

[deliriatremens]

[scoobygangs]

Spike’s reaction to Buffy’s death.

[casologist]

James Marsters said: “I’ve never played a character for this long. l’m used to doing stage, where you live with a character for a maximum of about four months. After five years, there really is a space somewhere in my soul where Spike and Buffy really do live. There really is a Sunnydale inside me somewhere. So when Buffy really was dead and I really was Spike it wasn’t hard at all to break down. It was crushing. That’s the weird thing about acting, man. We’re not insane, but we’re paid to use our imaginations as fully as we can. So somewhere down inside my heart there really is a Spike and a Buffy and he’s very much hoping that he’ll get a little more time with Buffy.”

[angryjalebi]

I always felt the tears were real when watching this scene, the same way it was real for the fans. We all love Buffy, regardless of whether she’s real or not.

[frontmansdefender]

people saying “don’t use your full government name for your ao3”, “create different emails for work and personal use” but personally I think it’s both sad and dystopian how capitalism/companies/even schools think they have the rights to cross your personal boundaries and insert themselves into your personal life. like, I get it, safety wise, why checking digital footprints can be important sometimes. but a gay fanfiction is not a fucking threat that could ever cause anybody harm. it’s funny (not really, it’s still sad and dystopian) how they now think they can control your personal life and prevent you from having hobbies

[melioristicbeast]

"Heyyyyyy dad you're home early, it- uh- it's not what it looks like?" "It looks like someone's getting mauled" "Well I like to think the mauling's mutual-aaand he's covering his eyes, uh, stellar choice there, really 10/10 the judges are going wild-" "I'm going to Melissa's. Breakfast in the morning, both of you." "see I told you he wouldn't mind, now calm down and put those headlights away already"

1.5 years of sterek brainrot and I've somehow never drawn derek with red eyes nor the classic trope of the sheriff walking in on them? for shame, mel.

Any story featuring feral derek or him getting a little lost in his instincts are so important to me - this man who never gets to keep anything good in his life digging his claws into stiles and saying no, this one is mine, you can't have him - you see the vision 💭💭

a closeup as well as the lines under the cut, bc i quite like them on their own too:

[elliemillah]

[xollii]

who is this and why do they seem like a greek god

[mixterglacia]

I love that Dungeon Meshi's creator is like "I based Senshi off this old dude in our building that won't stop doing his laundry in his underwear, he's weird."

And tumblr (justifiably) wants him carnally.

[d6b-onion]

this video has been going around for a while but the English subtitles didn't match the energy of the spoken French at all. i had to fix it.

reblog to spread this version

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