not to Discourse but Iām a cis man and my partner is an afab enby and if you call us aĀ āstraight coupleā I will personally come to your house tie you to a chair and make you listen to a podcast about gender identity on endless repeat
this is specifically @ the people who saw us at pride together and saw them wearing a āTHEY/THEMā button and still referred to them as my āgirlfriendā youāre all cancelled thanks
itās called respecting queer people juice
y'know the really amazing thing about the notes on this post - apart from just the sheer number of people who are, like, viscerally terrified of the existence of a person who isnāt cis - is how many of them are responding to things that arenāt here. specifically, youāll notice I said nothing about my sexuality. I didnāt say I identified as non-het, or that I considered myself part of the LGBTQIA community. on the flip side, I also didnāt give you any reason to believe Iām not bi, or that Iāve never been in a relationship with a cis man. y'all know nothing about my sexuality from this post and you donāt need to and Iām not going to tell you about it now because! this post! was not! about me!
it was about respecting my partnerās identity. and the fact that they donāt get that respect from people in the exact community that they should be able to count on getting it from.
ie, you.
they are not het or cis, and no relationship they are in will ever be a āstraight relationshipā because they. are not. het. or. cis.
everyone in the notes gatekeeping me because Iām ānot oppressedā? I never said I was. the person youāre really attacking and invalidating by shitting on this post is them, a pansexual nonbinary person who is unerasably queer.
huh. itās almost as if the whole āwe canāt let straight men use queerness to worm their way into our communityā discourse is just an excuse to hate trans people, isnāt it.
I reblog this every time I see itā
thinking abt all the ppl constantly posting abt afab nonbinary ppl who are dating cis men and saying that clearly their partner just thinks theyāre a woman. and how theyāre the same ppl on this post disrespecting opās partnerās identity. almost like yāall donāt respect afab nonbinary ppl and think theyāre just ābasically womenā (unless they physically transition in which case theyāre ābasically menā) but donāt want to admit that so you project that shit onto their partners.
Cis boy here is better to trans folks than some trans folks and y'all should be ashamed of yourselves.
Okay Iām gonna have to speak here.
As a very cis het passing person NOW, I have actually been bullied IN MY TEENAGE YEARS because of how androgynous I was. Which happened at the same time as me questionning my gender identity. So presence here means you could percieve a cis het man and juge me as such, but I actually am cis+ AND I have had the experience of queerphobia/transphobia. You couldnāt guess that from the way I am now.
And my fiancee is non-binary. And let me tell you that the knowledge that previous partners were reducing them to their original gender makes me want to do way worst than the podcast loop to them once Iād get them tied to a chair.
So here I am. A cis het passing dude who experienced oppression because of a percieved gender identity and who is now actively fighting for the gender identity of other people to be respected. So I think my demi-pan cis+ ass in this room actually bears more queer experience and activism than some of yāallās. Iām open to criticism my block button is lubed twice a day to keep it at maximal efficiency. Yāknow, skills you learn along the way.
