Henry Motherfucking Kissinger

[hbomb-kissinger]

I got locked out of my old blog @kissy-kissinger due to security clearance issues: This is my new blog.

[nixon-official]

My fellow america,

Why am i civered in

BLOOD?

[jamesdean-official]

You don’t remember last night?

[nixon-official]

Sometimes it's better to forget...

[jamesdean-official]

Well personally I found the night quite magical Nixon

[hbomb-kissinger]

AS DID I!

[nixon-official]

My Fellow Americans,

What does this mean?

[nixon-official]

I'M NOT PREGNANT!!!

[paul-is-dead-theory]

Is it Paul’s 👀👀👀👀👀

[nixon-official]

STOP REMINDING ME OF MY EX!!

[nixon-official]

Seriously though, IF (and this is purely a hypothetical because Richard Nixon is NOT nor has ever been pregnant)... but IF Richard Nixon ever HAS been pregnant, he would have already...taken care of it. So no worries! Nothing to see here. Definitely no pregnant presidents on this blog!

[hbomb-kissinger]

Would you like another child, cupcake?

If we could make it work?

I'd be happy to be a father figure to your child...participate in his or her upbringing. ;)

[nixon-official]

POWER ON:

pairing...

CONNECTING!

POWER ON:

pairing...

CONNECTED!

POWER ON:

POWER ON:

POWER ON:

POWER ON:

pairing...

pairing...

pairing...

pairing...

pairing...

pairing...

pairing...

pairing...

[beetlejuice-official]

Need some help?

[nixon-official]

im with @hbomb-kissinger now

[hbomb-kissinger]

There there. Daddy's home!

[davidaddington]

if I were Richard Nixon I would have simply killed Henry Kissinger if he got on my nerves at all

why didnt he just do this, he had the means

[hbomb-kissinger]

I'D LIKE TO SEE HIM FUCKING TRY.

[nixon-official]

My Fellow Americans,

I am not pregnant.

[michief-maker]

How very disappointing Richie darling!!!

[hbomb-kissinger]

Soon.

[politicalrpf]

Henry Kissinger in his office, early 1970s.

[nixon-official]

IDENTITY THEFT IS NOT A JOKE DICK!!!!!

Oh no...

@hbomb-kissinger have you been fucking with the portal again??

[hbomb-kissinger]

It must be the orb...

[tamamita]

[betsygimblesagain]

How many people out of the world's population do you think are Murder Virgins (have ended fewer than 1 human life)?

[nixon-official]

Fewer than you'd think.

[hbomb-kissinger]

Killing must feel good to God: He does it all the time. And are we not created in His Image?

God's Terrific. He dropped a church roof on 34 of His parishioners while they were groveling through a hymn to His Majesty. Don't you think GOD felt good about that??

[sexyronaldreagan-official]

Don't use AI just ask me things instead. It's my job as President to spread misinformation and I do it for FREE!!!

[trudeau-official]

How the hell do I bring communism to Canada?

[nixon-official]

YOU BETTER FUCKING NOT!

@hbomb-kissinger

[trudeau-official]

YOU CAN'T FRIGGEN STOP ME NIXON

[hbomb-kissinger]

[nixon-official]

Are you still Alive

Absolutely! I'm alive and thriving!

[truly-terrible-advice]

Do you have access to the US nuclear arsenal? Because if so, I have a suggestion.

[nixon-official]

OF COURSE I DO! I'M THE GIRLBOSS PRESIDENT!

TELL ME YOUR SUGGESTION. IF IT IS UNLAWFUL OR DISGUSTING AND/OR IMMORAL I WILL REPORT YOU TO THE CYBERPOLICE AND SOME SORT OF INTERNATIONAL ORGANIZATION!

[truly-terrible-advice]

Deploy them. All of them.

[nixon-official]

I'M CALLING THE INTERNATIONAL CRIMINAL COURT ON YOU!!!

[truly-terrible-advice]

We both know they're useless Richard.

[nixon-official]

LMAO, YOU CAN SAY THAT AGAIN!

[hbomb-kissinger]

[spiroagnewfan80]

I know the secrets to summoning Nixonites now.

[nixon-official]

@hbomb-kissinger @henrycarpetbombingkissinger

[hbomb-kissinger]

[nixon-official]

Why do I only feel alive when I threaten nuclear war?

[no-one-offical]

‎

[hbomb-kissinger]

[nixon-official]

WAR CRIMES, M.D.

[hbomb-kissinger]

You called?

[nixon-official]

im so sick right now all i can do is lay in bed and goon to clown porn

[nixon-official]

SHIT! I SWEAR I SENT THIS AS A DM, HOW DID THIS END UP ON MY BLOG?? 😭😭😭😭

[badboynixon]

CARE TO SHARE WHO YOU WERE DMING, DICK? 😏😏😏😏

[hbomb-kissinger]

[cheshirecatlair]

Wandering the Corridors of your Precious American Dream

The Sound of Footsteps Approaching Closer and Closer

But Never Do You See Its Face.

Have a Nice Day.

[nixon-official]

Oh God

[cheshirecatlair]

YOU CANNOT AVOID YOUR FATE, DICK.

Repent if you feel you must.

[nixon-official]

NOOOOOOOOO!!!! PLEASE DEAR GOD I BEG OF YOU HAVE MERCY ON THIS WRETCHED SOUL!

[cheshirecatlair]

Meow.

[hbomb-kissinger]