Squirtle Squad @i-am-secretly-batman - Tumblr Blog

Dolly Parton could have been a billionaire 3 times over but actively chose to give her money away to cause after cause for charity. She was an incredible musician and artist but more importantly lived with compassion and kindness and with the drive to help those around her in every way she could. God I’m sad. The world lost one one of the greats today :(

plumstreet

WHERE is that poem about that person learning all about their partners hyperfixation before getting dumped the last line is like "love is a stack of books on my nightstand with a bookmark near the end" I need it to feel whole help me please

cielosky

NYT Tiny Love Stories, 2/11/2020

A Bookmark Near the End

He loves history. He wanted to write a biography of John Quincy Adams. I, shamefully, knew almost nothing about John Quincy Adams, so I went online and bought every biography of him I could find. One day, he called me, claiming that we wouldn’t work out long term. He said he loved me but that we had different interests. “What does love mean to you?” I said. “That’s an impossible question,” he replied. I, however, find love to be quite simple. Love is the stack of biographies on my nightstand with a bookmark near the end. — Julia Nicole Camp

zephyr-of-death

how am I supposed to stay sane after reading this smh

wowwforever

if you told vin diesel fast and the furious you were gay he'd be like "Some people like driving stick…some people like driving automatic…what matters is you cross the finish line.." and then he'd rev up a dodge challenger and drive through a building and kill 16 people

boogerwookiesugarcookie

he literally did in the fourth one when he's asked if he likes cars more than women

explorerrowan

If you asked if he was cool with trans people, he'd probably say "sometimes, aftermarket parts are the only way to get the vehicle you really want. Everyone should have the right to hot rod."

orcboxer

amyspauldingart

Fire Brandy

Infernal engineer and though she may be a "lesser demon" I think she's the greatest!

apollosunn-moved-deactivated202

anyone else relate

midnightclover

crazy-brazilian

King

longscorsese

my man was not having a great time

jacksitchytriggerfinger

You think that's bad?

mexicast

his own mom said this to him lol

spiribia

has anyone noticed that halloween gets less and less halloween every year lately or is it the puncture wound in the world that everything slowly leaks out of in the end (leaves and comes back in a cape) vas that guy bothering you

lillie-garden

kissing you on the forehead

increasingpanic-deactivated2024

with tongue?

lillie-garden

with tongue. 🥰

just-taking-adam-break

moveslikekeithrichards

when i was a kid my Getting To Sleep technique was visualizing a child-sized shriveled up mummy with big piercing eyes that would stand silhouetted in the doorway & stare at me & probably attack if i so much as opened my eyes after getting into bed & this technique caused me to develop a lifelong nighttime-induced paranoia & it still takes me 2 hours to fall asleep. so i wouldnt recommend that

reallyfuckingsad

The DCC classes are a joke but they are also so fitting. Princesss Donut is so a former child actor, having just outgrown her mom/agent/human miss Beatrice. She's having public crash outs, being drugged to perform better. Pre crawl, shes got a clock ticking down until they make her have kittens with her uncle, same way so many child actors have people counting down until their 18th birthday. She's simultaneously a teenager socialized to be an adult (dependant on her parent-ish figure Carl while raising a child of her own) and an adult without enough life experiance to safely navigate the world ("why would a stripper lie to me?")

Katia is a monster truck driver. A small fleshy human inside a big metal machine. Monster truck drivers actually don't get hurt that often, despite the huge crashes. A lot of work goes into keeping them safe, so that they can destroy the things around them in an entertaining manner. So many people hurt their loved ones in automobile accidents though. Especially when substances are involved

Carl is a compensated anarchist. The AI and The Open Intellect Pacifist Action Network both litterally compensate him for his anarchist work. IDK, not much else to say about this one

vergak

Goddamn. Okay

stynamo

Did you have a kid in your neighborhood who always hid so good, nobody could find him? We did. After a while we would give up on him and go off, leaving him to rot wherever he was. Sooner or later he would show up, all mad because we didn't keep looking for him. And we would get mad back because he wasn't playing the game the way it was supposed to be played.

There's hiding and there's finding, we'd say. And he'd say it was hide-and-seek, not hide-and-give-UP, and we'd all yell about who made the rules and who cared about who, anyway, and how we wouldn't play with him anymore if he didn't get it straight and who needed him anyhow, and things like that. Hide-and-seek-and-yell. No matter what, though, the next time he would hide too good again. He's probably still hidden somewhere, for all I know.

As I write this, the neighborhood game goes on, and there is a kid under a pile of leaves in the yard just under my window. He has been there a long time now, and everybody else is found and they are about to give up on him over at the base. I considered going out to the base and telling them where he is hiding. And I thought about setting the leaves on fire to drive him out. Finally, I just yelled, "GET FOUND, KID!" out the window. And scared him so bad he probably wet his pants and started crying and ran home to tell his mother. It's real hard to know how to be helpful sometimes.

A man I know found out last year he had terminal cancer. He was a doctor. And knew about dying, and he didn't want to make his family and friends suffer through that with him. So he kept his secret. And died. Everybody said how brave he was to bear his suffering in silence and not tell everybody, and so on and so forth. But privately his family and friends said how angry they were that he didn't need them, didn't trust their strength. And it hurt that he didn't say good-bye.

He hid too well. Getting found would have kept him in the game. Hide-and-seek, grown-up style. Wanting to hide. Needing to be sought. Confused about being found. "I don't want anyone to know." "What will people think?" "I don't want to bother anyone."

Better than hide-and-seek, I like the game called Sardines. In Sardines the person who is It goes and hides, and everybody goes looking for him. When you find him, you get in with him and hide there with him. Pretty soon everybody is hiding together, all stacked in a small space like puppies in a pile. And pretty soon somebody giggles and somebody laughs and everybody gets found.

Medieval theologians even described God in hide-and-seek terms, calling him Deus Absconditus. But me, I think old God is a Sardine player. And will be found the same way everybody gets found in Sardines - by the sound of laughter of those heaped together at the end.

"Olly-olly-oxen-free." The kids out in the street are hollering the cry that says "Come on in, wherever you are. It's a new game." And so say I. To all those who have hid too good. Get found, kid! Olly-olly-oxen-free.

— Robert Fulghum, "All I Really Need To Know I Learned In Kindergarten"

segamascott

freegiftjones

one time i was making potato soup and i needed broth for it but i was out of broth. but in my dog food cabinet there was a carton of chicken broth that i had bought for my dog. now the box did say HUMAN GRADE and the ingredients were just bog standard chicken broth. it did say something about joint health for dogs on there. but the ingredients were normal. i even compared the ingredients list to some normal person broth and they were the same. so i did put dog broth in that soup and it did taste completely normal. but i did use the dog broth.