I'm going to be the biggest Sex God of all time... @iamasexgod - Tumblr Blog

The Nightmare is Over.

Schizoaffectives and Schizophrenics, rejoice! For the corruption failed. No more of the lies. No more of the liberal bullying. In God’s grace, we will be harmed no more.

#schizophrenia #schizoaffective #schizotypal #sjw #anti sjw #fuck you clinton #God #corruption #no more nightmares

So I’ve been gone for over a year.

Stuff happened. I moved to another place in the same town.

Let’s just say that 2015 was not a very good year for me.

This year has been better, though. Hopefully, it stays that way.

I don’t know what to do on tumblr anymore. Not only am I a lot different, but I just don’t have a lot in common with almost everyone online. I wrote a poem once that talked about how the internet only alienates me further, or at least I think that I did. A lot of things that I like that came from the internet now sort of suck. Like vaporwave (well, some good stuff still gets made). I didn’t even have internet at my apartment for over six months. Contrary to what you may think, that was actually kind of nice.

I’m just trying to make something of myself, and perhaps regain some magic in my life. So far, little is working, but there is no sense to stop. The only place is in the future.

This tumblr account is now 4 years old. It was very different in the beginning; I hardly post anymore, but I still love some parts around here.

#tumblr birthday #tumblr milestone

hey! I am a diagnosed schizotypal and I was interested in your whole e-zine thing. I see you want writings on philosophy or metaphysics, and I was wondering if maybe you could assign me a specific subtopic or something. Thanks much!

Hi.

I had that idea over a year ago. It gained a lot of interest on reddit, but it didn't really take off the ground. Maybe I can try to revive it, though. Such a thing would be interesting.

When having emotions, always remember that they will pass.

When having a thought, try to remember that few things are either absolute or permanent, and as such do not fixate or make it a foundation towards one's perception of the world.

Do not base one's view of the world on such fleeting impulses or ideas that beg to become static, and thus form a stagnant closed-system of belief. Rather, have these thoughts and emotions come and go, fueling the ones that come after, and so on. The only true system that can model the world or humanity is an open one, one that recognizes that no axioms are set in stone and adapts to the ever-changing nature of existence and life.

Do not get stuck, and always move on, with one thought and passion leading to another.

#Thoughts #thought #emotion #passion #axiomatic systems #systems #nature #world #life #philosophy #emotions #occult #evolution #infinity

Just remember

that all of your passions

needs

and desires

will leave like the wind

through the course

of time.

#emotions #passion #human emotion #human condition #human fallacy #poem #time

Nobody does tricks like chicks with dicks.

#the hard truth #chicks with dicks #shemales #sluts with nuts #mtf #tranny #transsexual

Am I a demon? An angel?

Perhaps I'm simply just not human.

#human #human condition #not human #demon #angel #God #spiritualism #occult

I don't have as much hatred towards a certain group of people anymore. It is still there, but I now realize that I was wrong, to a certain extent.

Ted Mother Fuckin' Bundy

#ted bundy #a man among men #the man #the legend #one of the greats

Even flowers can rise from the ashes of the dead.

#flowers #death #life #life after death #rebirth #regeneration

I have thought about what I last wrote a few days ago.

I can't detach. I'm too human. And I have evolved to the point where I care more about giving love, than receiving it.

I think that becoming a Christian (or at least, someone who has become closer to it) helped me to understand that it isn't all about me. The emotions, thoughts, and well-being of others matter just as much, if not more, than mine. Of course, you have to live your life for yourself, so as such a certain amount of selfishness is necessary.

I just couldn't deal with the pain, I guess. I've reached out to girls before who were hurt, and all I got was hostility. And I wasn't even trying to be with them in a romantic way; I was genuinely concerned.

But relationships (any kind, not just loving ones) require risk; you HAVE to become vulnerable, in order to have the opportunity to love another person. And for the longest time, I was a coward.

There were many excuses, of course. Ones that actually made sense. My complex (and somewhat abusive) relationships with my family, the aforementioned events in my youth, the apathy that I got from most people concerning both my own state, as well as that they didn't care about the state of other people when I did (or at least not as much).

The problem was that I made too many generalizations, particularly about women. And yes, some would hate me. But some wouldn't, and haven't.

And maybe one day, I will be loved, as I will love.

#Christianity #empathy #emotion #emotions #love #fallacy of love #family #family relationships #youth #psychology #relationships #Interpersonal relationship

I've stopped writing poetry, for now. I am going to write a book when the semester ends, though. That will be neat.

I was just thinking this morning about how for the longest time, I had these feelings of love for a certain group of women. It should have taken me faster than it did to realize that not only would they hate me for it, but also their relatives would hate me, and their relatives would hate the women, and I would in turn both hate me and the other parties. The hatred, born from good intentions, would boil over until I would most likely either say or do something very cruel and horrible.

Despite the initial, misguided love, the only common denominator would be hate.

And then it dawned on me: what I had for the women wasn't love. For love requires knowledge and understanding, and having met none of them, I didn't nor ever would truly know or understand them. You can't love an idea, or an image, or a mere thought; it has to be a real person, with a real personality. What I simply had was passion, and empathy, both of which are basically very impersonal, or at least can be. Love, has to be personal, and you cannot love someone you have never met. And as for what happened to them? It doesn't say anything about what kind of people they were, or are currently. They could have been people I would have never cared about, outside of the incident. Perhaps some of them even deserved what happened to them. That is a horrible thing to say, but knowing both how complex human psychology is, and how the incident was, I wouldn't put that far into the realm of impossibility.

So, if I don't truly love them, and if I would only receive hate, then the answer is simple. I shouldn't love, for it is not truly love, and I will only become vulnerable in the end. And yet I shouldn't hate, for then I would become another monster to them, and perhaps a hypocrite myself.

All I can do is detach, and try to let go. Have that moment of empathy for the slightest moment, and then move on. For it had nothing to do with me, and never will.