Le déserteur

Confused. Dazed by the moonlight. Might make you smile. Might make you cry. Yeeehaw They/Them

[bonyassfish]

Speaking as a survivor of child sex abuse: the world would be a lot better if yall spent less time talking about the ways in which pedophiles should be punished and more time supporting survivors and preventing abuse

I get it, punishment can feel cathartic. I’ve certainly spent time imagining all the ways in which my own abuser might be punished. But ultimately, him dying, or being jailed, or publicly shamed, isn’t actually going to help me nor will it stop more kids from getting hurt in the future.

I don’t want more prisoners. I want free therapy with trauma informed counselors. I want better sex education for young children that teaches them about consent and body autonomy. And I want a society in which I can openly discuss my trauma, or at least as openly as yall discuss the evils of pedophiles

[bellaswansong]

yeah how come we cant even mention how we were hurt but y'all can bring up pedophilia anytime you want in front of us for no greater purpose than virtue signalling? thus reminding us of what happened daily while we are just trying to vibe. thus compounding the harm we went through. food for thought

[xanaxfarts]

allow yourself to be a beginner

[intelligentchristianlady]

A bus may have only a couple of passengers, especially at the beginning or end of its route. But let's also take fuel efficiency into account.

[foxoftheasterisk]

If there's one person on a bus because that person cannot or doesn't want to drive, the bus is succeeding.

[luckyladylily]

I read a study once on the fuel efficiency of various types of commuter vehicles (car, bus, train) on a per person basis and the number of people needed riding public transit to match the "efficiency" of cars is shockingly low. A bus needs to carry like 3-4 people to be fuel efficient, and trains require 2-3 per train car. Both often carry two dozen or more during peak hours, more than justifying any perceived requirements for efficiency for the train or bus to provide service the entire day.

[brightlotusmoon]

[queen-mihai]

This blog supports ubiquitous, free, and continuous public transport.

This blog supports full use of every type of public transport

Busses and trains beat planes and cars

More, and better public transport!

[godlessondheimite]

[fluffmugger]

#so did they miss the part where gatsby ends up floating dead in a pool and all the miserable deaths in wuthering heights#or did they miss that because there weren’t any chapters titled In Which The Sinners Are Punished For Their Errors#like. even if you require explicit moral instruction from literature it’s pretty hard to miss the comeuppance in those.

[pennie-dreadful]

“What I assume my teachers were trying to teach me”

[doctorbluesmanreturns]

Huck Finn is about a white Southern boy who was raised to believe that freeing slaves is a sin that would send you directly to hell who forges a familial bond with a runaway slave and chooses to free him and thereby in his mind lose his salvation because he refuses to believe that his best friend and surrogate father is less of a man just because he’s black. Yes it features what we now consider racial slurs but this is a book written only 20 years after people were literally fighting to be allowed to keep other human beings as property, we cannot expect people from the 1880s to exactly conform with the social mores of 2020, and more to the point if we ourselves had been raised during that time period there’s very little doubt that we would also hold most if not all of the prevalent views of the time because actual history isn’t like period novels written now where the heroes are perfect 21st century social justice crusaders and the villains are all as racist and sexist as humanly possible. Change happens slowly and ignoring the radical statement that we’re all human beings that Twain wrote at a time when segregation and racial tensions were still hugely prevalent just because he wrote using the language of his time period is short-sighted and foolhardy to the highest degree.

[mikkeneko]

I’m really kind of alarmed at the rise in the past few years of the “and we do condemn! wholeheartedly!” discourse around historical figures. it seems like people have somehow boomeranged between “morals were different in the past, therefore nobody in the past can ever be held accountable for ANY wrongs” to “morals are universal and timeless, and anything done wrong by today’s standards in the past is ABSOLUTELY unforgiveable” so completely, because social media 2.0 is profoundly allergic to nuance

please try this on for size:

there have always been, in past times as today, a range of people in every society, some of whom were even then fighting for a more just and compassionate accord with their fellow man and some of whom let their greeds and hatreds rule them to the worst allowable excesses. the goal of classics and history education is to teach you enough context to discern between the two, not only in the past but in the present

[three--rings]

My mind just boggles at the “There’s Racism In That Book” argument.  Yes, there is racism in that book, because that book is ABOUT RACISM.  The message is that it is BAD. 

My high school English teacher, who was a viciously brilliant woman, used to say that when people banned Huck Finn they said it was about the language, but it was really the message they were trying to ban, the subversive deconstruction of (religious) authority and white supremacy.

[lyricwritesprose]

Huckleberry Finn can actually be seen as a powerful case study in trying to do social justice when you have absolutely no tools for it, right down to vocabulary.  And in that respect, it’s a heroic tale, because Huck—with absolutely no good examples besides Jim, who he has been taught to see as subhuman, with no guidance, with everyone telling him that doing the right thing will literally damn him, with a vocabulary that’s full of hate speech—he turns around and says, “I’m not going to do it.  I’m not going to participate in this system.  If that means I go to Hell, so be it.  Going to Hell now.”

(I used to read a blogger who insisted that “All right, I’ll go to Hell,” from Huckleberry Finn is the most pure and perfect prayer in the canon of American literature.  Meaning, as I understand it, that the decision to do the right thing in the face of eternal damnation is the most holy decision one can make, and if God Himself is not proud of the poor mixed-up kid, then God Himself is not worth much more than a “Get thee behind me,” and the rest of us should be lining up to go to Hell too.  Worth noting that this person identified as an evangelical Christian, not because he was in line with what current American evangelicals believe, but because “they can change their name, I’m not changing mine.”  Interesting guy.  Sorry for the long parenthetical.)

Anyway, the point of Huck Finn, as far as I can tell, is that you can still choose to do good in utter darkness, with no guidance and no help and none of the right words.

And when you put it like that, it’s no wonder that a lot of people on Tumblr—people who prioritize words over every other form of social justice—find it threatening and hard to comprehend.

[starkidlabs]

Dracula and Jonathan’s Tango - from The Polish National Opera production of ‘Dracula’.

With Choreography by Krzysztof Pastor and Music by Wojciech Kilar.

[keire-ke]

Heads up, the whole thing is officially available on YouTube, for the next two months

[iambluedevils]

Here is a moment of: free writing, a spilling of that brain of mine. And basically a messy thing about friendship identity and life as always

As noted by a dear friend. I really have very VERY different sides of myself. To explain more clearly.

I don't have different personalities. It's just variations on how I can be myself. How I retain myself what I show, decide to show and how I show it.

As for the parts of me : I like really different things. That can almost be paradoxical.

Frankly it's when I find crossroads that I am the most happy.

Like when I have moment of friendly tenderness with the people I like and that I relate with in arrays of unhinged love for dislocated noise music.

When I help another friend for his writings by explaining to him how immolation works.

This website is a good representation of it. Not the whole story but a part.

Agere gore fandoms magick philosophy fangirling makeup shallow aesthetics plushies deep reflexion on morals art modern and ancient.

I have everything compressed and suggested to me.

And some at first cannot be completely related. But as human we are complex.

Liking sweet imagery and adorable balls of fluff. But also horrid and fascinating pictures of flesh wounds and blood.

There are always reasons for our deep interests (I'm not talking autism)

But facets makes us whole. Even in details.

We are well written characters.

And fucking great ones.

Imperfect complex and hard to fully grasps. Some sides only speak to specific passionates.

To me that is the beauty of multiple relationships. Not having only one group of friends.

To know me. See everyone that I interact with.

Yes even the objects I treat like humans.

Magically also some dear friends that with an outside view would have nothing to tell eachother,are actually good soil for new friendships. Their lifestyle are radically different. But they have a soul point in commun that I saw. And isn't it wonderful. I wish they could see it like I do.

So, that was a rant. I decided to put it here instead of my noteapp.

I like to do that. Blogging is both too personal. Risky. And confortable.

I don't write here like in my journal. Nor like in any other places.

Enjoy sweet creatures.

[iambluedevils]

Just found my new fav romantic comfort movie I'm crying it's so good and fun.

I love movies with weird girls and bad but not so bad boys.

Unhinged movies

Sweet love stories with strong criticism on American family model

Yay Dinner in America!!!!!

[iambluedevils]

Damn the knees are killing me again. I can never be free from the weather

Too much heat , I'm dead

Savior rain arise ?

Beautiful night storms ?

Huge knee pain like the old man that I am

[ashereden]

Are you being a good girl?

no I’m chewing on electrical cords

[utopians]

going up to a couple sitting in the hot tub of a public pool and starting to cut vegetables into the water and stirring with my big spoon

[iambluedevils]

Cute mascots I saw during my training for outside and shops walk.

[iambluedevils]

Zopiclone really has the worst taste. Like the bitterness lays and lingers. The water you drink taste awful and the morning it's mild but the same.

At least it puts me to sleep but eh

[iambluedevils]

Ooooooooooooooooooo

The feeling of numbness and sleepyness when the medecine is working while discovering the most tranquil and magnificent space stoner rock playlist.

It's very amazing

I bet that even with natural sleep it works that's a wonder for what I have.

[odofemi]

"Crazy Trans Woman" Syndrome

My doctor, who is a trans woman, and I had a conversation today about the guy who raped me earlier this year. At first she was like “did you charge him?” When I explained that he’s a trans man of colour, she immediately got why I hadn’t. Not because I couldn’t bare to put a trans person, especially a trans person of colour, in jail (which I can’t), but also because it would cause me to be completely ostracized by the queer/trans community in Toronto. I’d be “just another crazy trans woman.” It was an uncomfortable realization for both of us to sit there, as trans women, knowing that we have literally no recourse when violence is enacted on us within the community (though if the same violence conveniently came from a white cis straight man, we would be celebrated as heroes for standing up to such an easy target, at least within the queer/trans community).

She and I both, as professionals in the community, are well aware of the fine line we have to walk in order to be taken seriously in the queer/trans community. We not only have to look a certain way (both in terms of passing and in terms of conforming to queer normative acceptable standards of appearance), we also have to make sure not to rock the boat too much. We have to appear as sane and calm as possible, no matter the circumstances. If we show too much emotion at any time (read: any inconvenient emotion), we get hit with a double-whammy of misogyny and transphobia, quickly written off as hysterical “crazy trans women.” Accuse the wrong person of something, anyone too close to queer-home, and that’s the end of our credibility and the revoking of our entrance passes to Queerlandia.

It’s exhausting having to walk such a fine line. I’ve found that there are so many “danger zones” to watch out for. Trans women have to not only be queer-literate (knowing queer social justice language), we have to be exceptionally good at using it. Any minor slip of language or politics and we’re labeled “crazy trans women” by cis people while trans men nod knowingly in agreement — rarely standing up for us, and just as often perpetuating the ‘crazy trans woman’ stereotype themselves.

I became aware of this initially through cryptic warnings from an older queer trans woman friend of mine, years before I became involved in the queer community, but I didn’t realize the extent of it at first. That is, until I was invited to participate in it. When I first became involved heavily, I befriended two trans men whom I looked up to a great deal, and one of the first conversations we had in private was a gossip session in which they “warned” me about various trans women and got me to agree that they were “crazy.” I’ve found similar conversations throughout the community, often used in a way that it makes me wonder if what’s really happening is that they’re subconsciously testing my loyalty to the queer zeitgeist. Am I good tranny or a bad tranny? Am I willing to be part of their clique, giving them the ability to deflect any and all criticism of transmisogyny, or am I a “problem?”

Before I realized that this was a system, that trans women were being systematically tested and written off, I engaged in it myself. You get a self-esteem boost, knowing that the cool kids don’t count you among those trans women. Those trans women who stepped on the wrong toes, who take up “too much space,” who don’t have the right guilt-producing identity complex to be worthy of space (disabled young trans sex workers of colour who vogue are considered highly prized friend-accessories, to be seen but not really heard beyond the occasional “gurl” for comedic effect, but only if they have the right haircut and the right clothes and are working towards a bachelors of gender studies or similarly useless degree).

Who are these “crazy trans women?” Often they are incredibly sincere activists who haven’t had the privilege of being taught all of the ins and outs of anti-oppression social justice practice that is a prerequisite to membership in this queer community. Often they are labeled “too emotional” and “too angry,” “loose cannons” who are out of control when speaking about our experiences of sex work that don’t fit into the easily digestible “I do queer feminist porn on weekends to pay for my fluevogs while I’m in grad school” vision of sex work that the queer community has deemed acceptable. Often they are trans women who are said to take up “too much space,” while everyone whispers about how “you know, I know it’s wrong to say, but she just seems like she has male privilege, you know? Like you can just feel it. Not that I’m saying she’s a man, but, you know, you never know.”

At the end of the day, this whole complex of issues is simply misogyny, ableism, and transphobia dressed up as “community accountability.” It holds trans women to impossible standards, opening us up to vulnerability to all forms of in-community violence (physical, sexual, social), and creating a fear within the minds of so many queer trans women that our second-class position within the queer community could be ripped from our hands at any time for any minor infraction.

I’m tired of trying not to be a crazy trans woman in the voyeuristic eyes of queer community.

Morgan M Page/Odofemi, 2013.

[orangeslime-deactivated20160813]

im just gonna keep reblogging this because EVERYONE NEEDS TO READ AND REBLOG (NOT JUST LIKE) THIS RITE NOW. i havent read a post on tumblr that covered so many important points on transmisogyny in queer spaces so well in a long time. and seeing as how no one ever seems to really have these conversations, it makes it all the more important. SO READ AND REBLOG IT DAMMIT.

[iambluedevils]

Procrastinating sleep so much I am creating things and have my body ACHING for sure. That's a mood.

I wanted to sleep early. I even have medecine for it now 😭

Being sick for weeks broke me for sure

[iambluedevils]

I am in the process of making a whole lot of zines. Translations and original to create a sort of independent house of edition. It's funny. Because I feel really bad by what I want to do is becoming more tangible. Like I write again. I make art again

That's neat and terrifying

[couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name]

when I was a little kid at some point I got upset with my parents because I didn't have a crucifix in my bedroom and they did- I was like why do YOU get to be safe from vampires??? you're okay with me getting my blood sucked???? so we took a little trip to the catholic store but the one closest to us was run by a group of nuns that had been moved here from romania. I got a little baby pink cross and this sweet old nun was like 'aww, is this a baptism gift?' and I was like no. I need to be protected from vampires. and she immediately got SO serious and was like 'this is the best one we've got, you'll definitely be safe' and since she was literally from vampire land I was convinced she was like, van helsing. like the whole time my parents had been laughing about how cute my fear was but she literally Knew dracula and was taking my concerns seriously I held this over my parents for so long lmfao

[iambluedevils]

Very good and interesting