The Poisonus

hello, I'm icclo, I'm 23 years old and I'm a Dutch NEET. They/Them. Poly, Pan, AGender

[cringeunworthy]

I'm gonna get so much mileage out of this one

[vitariesocks]

just received the best text message I’ve ever had. from my mom

[vitariesocks]

2 pics. no caption

[a-very-cute-snake]

[messsssmer]

"Whimsy" is truly a wretched term. What maketh thee so carefree?

[fireknightqueelign]

thy mother

[messsssmer]

Art thou for fucking real

[autistic-reptile]

sorry I saw a post about AAVE and got fired up and had to make this

[innerchildabortionclinic]

getting kicked off love island for just swimming in the pool and not talking to anyone

[wizardshark]

So fun fact from when I worked on multiple reality shows, names redacted for NDA purposes.

Gay people are INCREDIBLY ANNOYING for production when they are on reality shows cause they always do shit like this. Reality shows pick their cast specifically for people who will create drama, so it tracks that bringing in some gay people (in the era that I worked, 2013-2018, this was considered to be new and interesting) would diversify people enough to create some conflict. To a degree, this was true.

But what actually happened was that the gay person, or worse, people, would end up estranged from the other people because Straight People Who Are Fucking Nuts in a way that would be ideal for a reality show are very different from Gay People Who Are Fucking Nuts.

There's one particular instance I remember in which our Gay Person tm wasn't getting into drama and no one could figure out why. Any time anything happened it would just defuse almost instantly. Eventually we prodded during a solo interview and one of the guys said something along the lines of "Mayn gay marriage just got legalized n shit if I yell at this guy I'm being a homophobe". This meant that our gay was COASTING along in this reality show cause no one would vote him out!!

But you know what the PINNACLE of this was?

DATING SHOWS.

One... Very popular dating show I worked on (you know the one) has an unofficial, unwritten rule: you can only have 1 queer woman in the cast of ladies. This is because for a solid few years, if ever there were two bisexual women in the show, they would ALWAYS abandon the man and run off together instead. You can't have contestants saying shit like "this guy has no personality and sucks ass. I prefer this girl I met who actually listens to me". Like this was an actual epidemic in the casting. It happened over and over for YEARS and they couldn't find a way to stop it without literally separating the women from each other, which obviously wouldn't be good for the show. They also couldn't show this was happening because that. Uh. Would be pretty bad to reveal to audiences.

Eventually they just decided to subtly prod and see if women who were going on the show were gay and then avoid having two on the same season at the same time. To my knowledge they still do it this way.

Anyways the summary is that gay people are fucking crazy in a way that heterosexual tv just does not know how to handle

[askthegrandhearthmother]

I love(hate) how their first solution was to be blatantly biphobic

instead of getting men that don't suck

[gingik]

[innerchildabortionclinic]

interesting kink assortment on the dash

[anti-parent]

teamwork makes the dream work. and dreamwork. makes shrek

[anti-parent]

fantastic. i love it. i posted this after my wife said it yesterday and as i was doing it i was like "this can't be an original thought. as soon as i hit post someone's going to say 'you stole this from a tweet from 2014' and i'll say 'no, i stole it from my beautiful wife.'"

[teathattast]

[dogwithpants]

That’s this

[teathattast]

Goes to show how little I know

[evilvillain123456789]

The really crazy part is the Twitter post is the original and the tumblr post is the one that's plagiarized

[teathattast]

Net zero info ass post

[cats2019forthenintendoswitch]

We literally can see in both the screenshots that the tumblr post was posted first (also evilvillain123456789 lies recreationally, constantly) why are y'all so bad at fact-checking literally anything

[evilvillain123456789]

Stop

[onedirectionforever]

“you support gay rights so you must be gay”

i support animal rights do i look like a fucking alpaca to you

[onedirectionforever]

turns out i am gay

[monsieurenjlolras]

holy shit how’d this alpaca learn how to type

[mywitchcultblr]

Diversity win! The alpaca is gay!

[adreamthatsworthkeeping]

[thebirdkiwi]

he was a llama

[fritextramole]

a llama?! he’s supposed to be dead!

[venusswasaboy]

I quote this and laugh to myself very, very often.

[infertilityidol]

[farmgf]

[dehydratedbunny]

just like a cokey cola......

[bogleech]

The christian family in these memes (which are absolutely all over facebook these days) genuinely do always look miserable. Who the fuck is relating to these stock mormon farm cultists. That is a couple who made love only once in pitch darkness with bags on their heads then celebrated the pregnancy with a feast of uncooked potatoes and warm tapwater. The baby seems intrigued though. Maybe only by the bottle of pills??

[sunshine-tattoo]

Could not leave this in the tags <3

[vergak]

Zillow house listings

[aaays-and-bees]

>go right

[vergak]

[giugirl743]

>go left instead (looks nice and fun!)

[vergak]

[bunjywunjy]

>…go back to the right

[vergak]

[muhlisss]

Go left

[vergak]

[muhlisss]

Go forward

[vergak]

> Ascend

[vergak]

[jpuff9]

Go right ->

[vergak]

[athena-viviana]

Open the door! :3c

I wanna see what’s inside!

[vergak]

Congratulations! You Have Made It To The Ping Pong Chamber!

[anachronic-cobra]

[adderall-juice]

me when they call my name at mcdonals (i am approaching the counter)

[blogspede]

here you go sir

[adderall-juice]

thank you