Andulka
Show & Tell
Cosmic Funnies
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ojovivo
Game of Thrones Daily
Misplaced Lens Cap
JVL
Stranger Things
styofa doing anything
occasionally subtle
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Origami Around
titsay
sheepfilms
⁂
almost home
Sweet Seals For You, Always
YOU ARE THE REASON
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@iforgotthesardines
When you’re a kid, one teacher walking into another teacher’s classroom is the biggest crossover event reality has to offer
my physics and english teacher hated each other and the physics teacher made a habit of getting grades back to students as quickly as possible and one day he just walked into her classroom and started handing back tests while she was trying to lecture
FUCK silverfish
if those are the little bug things that look like centipedes yeah fuck em omfg
I HATE THEM SO MUCH
OH IN MINECRAFT I THOUGHT YOU MEANT. REAL ONES SLDKJFLSKDJLFSDF
wait
WHAT DO YOU MEAN REAL ONES
where do you think the name came from
i don’t know, tumblr user plump9000. i sort of thought they weren’t real, like endermen. or creepers.
>implying endermen aren’t real
really not liking what you’re implying buddy
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‘What now becomes of this Fellowship? Without Gandalf, hope is lost.’ ‘The quest stands upon the edge of a knife. Stray but a little and it will fail to the ruin of all. Yet hope remains while the company is true.’
take your carriage very slowly by your rival’s home, that she might see your latest hat
Eat your heart Catherine, you toad-eating hag.
Elizabeth, you must surely be aware that I am unable to view the roads from my apartments due to the vastness of my estate…
Oh, please do forgive my mistake, Catherine, I had only assumed you could see from that ostentatiously high pedestal atop of which you have placed yourself
People that think archaeologists are concerned with protecting the status quo or are afraid of “rewriting the history books” are so funny because every one of my archaeology courses is chock full of
“now I really don’t like this term, but we need to use it so remember it’s problematic”
“I disagree with this author a lot but I want you to make your own conclusions”
“archaeologists in the past didn’t know what they were doing and this has been recently disproven”
and my favorite, “this is what we think about this now, but once your generation does further research that will most likely change”
No gay has all 5:
- A job
- Good relationship with father
- Neurotypical brain
- Ability to top
- Driver’s license
this is a fun post because people will say how many they have in the tags then you get to figure out which ones.
are archaeologists and paleontologists, friends, or bitter rivals?
Friends. We both dig stuff from the ground.
We are exhausted rivals with people who think we are the same! United front!!
Legolas has no idea how old he is. None.
He has a general, ball park idea of his age, he can (usually) guess it within 20- 30 or so years. But that’s all.
He lost count somehwere in his first thousandth years of life and never bothered to figure it out again.
However, if you ask him his age he will tell you WILDLY different answers that seem to be randomly selected out of thin air.
Pippin: Legolas, how old are you?
Legolas: I am 8987 years.
Aragorn: Okay no, Ada isn’t even 8000 years old yet. Try again.
Legolas: I am 72 years old.
Aragorn: And you certainly arnt younger than me.
Legolas: I am 678 years old.
Aragorn: I also feel like that is incorrect.
Legolas: I am 3000 years old.
Aragorn: Much more plausible, but still, I think, incorrect.
Legolas: I am exactly 8 years old.
Aragorn: why are you the way that you are
Legolas: :)
Bridesmaid to a waiter: What a beautiful wedding
Waiter, about to reveal that the poor groom’s bride is a whore: Oh you haven’t heard?
the number of people making comments on this post about how there’s nothing wrong with being a whore is far too high like i’m not trying to shame people who are promiscuous or sex workers this is a fucking reference to a song and if you dont understand the reference dont reblog with some idiotic trying too hard to be progressive shit its literally a joke about a lyric from a song it was never, and never will be, that fucking deep. if you dont get the reference literally just shut up and dont reblog this post oh my god
by fall out boy
I dont know what’s funnier the people getting offended because they don’t get the panic reference or the people getting offended because they don’t get the fall out boy joke
Comprehension of this post is what defines the Millennial / Gen Z generational boundary.
by panic! at the disco
remember when people were saying Pink was evil or some shit because she faked her own death to get away from the other diamonds
you know I already thought her actions were understandable if a bit misguided but you know what the more I see of White the more I think she 100% did the right thing
I thought this was about Pink the singer for a second and wanted to know how I missed the fact that she faked her own death.
And why she was trying to escape Marina and the rest of the diamonds…
i just saw a picture saying “dø or die” and it literally translates to die or die
#do u want to die in danish or english
*Hamlet sweats nervously*
the princess diaries was anne hathaway’s first movie and like can you imagine being in her place and just casually being told oh btw julie andrews is your co-star no pressure welcome to hollywood
I imagine it would feel something like this
that’s the plot of the movie
i’m screaming
I don’t think this woman is straight anymore.
Yall are missing the best fucking part
This is my new favourite post on tumblr, bye
Omg
Anti-trans activists caused a transgender children’s charity - Mermaids - to have part of it’s lottery funding suspended. In response, Youtuber HBomberGuy decided to do a non-stop playthrough of Donkey King 64 until getting to 101% completion while donating any money raised to Mermaids.
Highlights: John Romero jumped on the stream and shouted “TRANS RIGHTS” which caused donations to go wild.
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez and Cher retweeted the stream. AOC seems to have joined the Discord for the stream.
AOC TALKED ON DISCORD IN THE STREAM. She was amazing and so eloquent.
“fuck terfs gang” getting spammed in chat is cleansing my pores.
Further Update: Neil Gaiman retweeted. Also, they reached $222,222 while HBomberGuy was taking a #2.
Another Update: Matt Mercer retweeted. The chat also just helped pay for a disabled trans person’s wheelchair enough that they could basically buy two wheelchairs.
Hidetaka Swery just boosted the stream
the funniest thing in the entire pirates of the caribbean series is definitely that one scene in At World’s End where they have parlay but davy jones is part of it, and rather than have him stand in the shallows or something they get a big bucket of water and have in stand on it on shore
who thought of that idea? who thought “put davy jones in a bucket of water” and had the guts to suggest it aloud? and then who went “hey that sounds like a great idea!”
at some point someone told davy jones their idea was for him to stand in a bucket of water and he agreed to it
*stands majestically in a bucket*
ok but notice the trail of buckets behind him meaning he walked from the ocean through three other buckets of water before he got into the one hes standing in
It’s even funnier when you consider how he must have figured all this out in the first place.
Some folks are asking “well, if he can avoid the no-dry-land curse simply by standing in a bucket, doesn’t that ruin his whole motivation?”, but he’s not on dry land here.
The parley takes place on a sandbar - which, for the unfamiliar, is a temporary “island” of sand deposited by breaking waves, unconnected with the shore, that spends most of its time submerged, being exposed only at low tide.
What Jones is doing here is rules-lawyering his curse. Can you imagine the trial and error he must have gone through in order to determine that this would actually work?
“Okay, do islands count as dry land? How about parts of the shore below the high tide mark? Reefs? Shoals? What if I stand in a pool of water on a shoal? Does it have to be seawater, or will any water do? Does it have to be a natural tidepool, or can it be something artificial, like a bucket?”
What I am saying is that there must have been a process.
Pretty sure that this implies that the reverse - a bucket of sand, floating on the water (big bucket with just a bit of sand), would qualify as dry land. That’s absurd, so I’m pretty sure that his lawyer pulled a fast one over the curse governor.
It may be absurd, but the text of the film bears it out. Davy Jones can sense the presence of his heart while it’s at sea, but not while it’s on land (indeed, that’s why he buried it on land in the first place: to break his connection with it) - yet placing the heart in a simple jar of dirt conceals it from Jones’ awareness just as surely as burial on land does, even if the jar is on a boat at the time. Suitably prepared vessels filled with dirt absolutely count as dry land for the purpose of Jones’ curse.
Then the reverse should also be true. If he buried it in a jar of water, no matter how far inland it is, he would be able to sense it. So by this logic, any container of seawater counts as not dry land, ergo, the bucket is a perfectly viable loophole.
Not necessarily. It’s traditionally a lot easier to accidentally get whammied by a curse than it is to weasel around it - I figure that’s why he’s using multiple layers of indirection here. He’s forbidden to set foot on dry land, but it’s technically not dry land (it’s a sandbar, a non-permanent landform exposed only at low tide) and he technically didn’t set foot on it (he’s standing in a bucket of water). It’s entirely possible that either one of those things alone wouldn’t make the grade.
okay but this all raises one further, very important question: if it’s specifically “dry land” he’s forbidden from, what about wetlands. can Davy Jones fight you in salt marshes? can he throw down in a peat bog?Swamp Battle?
This is the quality content I come to Tumblr for.
could he step on land if his shoes are wet?
No matter how ridiculous PotC gets I will love it. Especially when it results in conversations like this
What if he crawls around on his hands and knees, with his feet raised slightly into the air? Can he walk on his hands? Can he ride around in a litter or a wheelchair?
can he be in a wheelbarrow?
What if he flies over dry land? Like in a hot air balloon, or in the claws of a giant bird?
What if he’s carried by two swallows using a strand of creeper?
European swallows or African swallows?
this whole thread reads like a conversation between these two:
In fact im not entirely sure that it wasn’t their idea in the first place
