I'm Dan

I am an old man, filled with regret, waiting to die alone. He/Him

[gummybearattacktheworldofdespair]

[sapphic-gengar]

BRING HIM BACK

[gummybearattacktheworldofdespair]

[sapphic-gengar]

oh thank goodness

[pmamtraveller]

Checkmate

[snapjaw-scavenger]

be honest am i going to scale well late game?

[woman-becomer]

imagine a goat with a hat

STOP-

what hat did you give the goat what is the instinctual hat you gave to this goat

[im-dan]

[goodluckclove]

pick a kickass internet hacker name

spyder

megabyte

kernal crash

The Overrider

website

Daniel

Voting ended onJul 26

[goodluckclove]

pick a kickass catchphrase for your Internet hacker persona

"error four-oh-NO"

"I'm breaking down this firewall...one brick at a time"

"we NEED more ram!"

"I have to head out guys, I have a dentist appointment"

"my WPM is SO GOOD I could be an administrative assistant if I wanted to"

"it's Daniel time"

Voting ended onJul 20

[goodluckclove]

Daniel goes to Barber College when they aren't hacking the mainframe and reconfiguring the network.

[tranthony]

grout white shark

[normalcei]

Not all dogs have jobs and I think they should get to wear little vests too

[mr-deep-downer]

meanwhile on Twitter

you could make the argument that it’s foolish that everyone in the world should know what the Odyssey is but if you’re from a western country that literally has Greek history stolen away in your museum then well, really a child left behind.

[mr-deep-downer]

Greek Architectural Treasures in the British Museum

Greek Architectural Treasures in the British Museum

“The world doesn’t revolve around America” the illiad was actually a pseudo historical/mythological text about the first game of baseball

[thedragonitus]

Its a metaphor for the drive through

[sauteedkapi]

I dunno what you guys are talking about, seems pretty American to me.

[mr-deep-downer]

only 8 dollars and 12 cents huh? What the fuck was Odysseus problem then

[thatiswhy]

there was road work

[star-dragon-in-the-tardis]

I desire a version of this story set in America though and just getting completely fucking lost.

[mr-deep-downer]

O Brother, Where Art Thou? (2000) ⭐ 7.7 | Adventure, Comedy, Crime

1h 47m | PG-13

[blackshvck]

the idea that every summer will be as hot if not hotter than this for the rest of my life is unbearable i need to (remembers suicide jokes are bad for my mental health) murder an oil executive

[eclecticopposition]

what is THE worst thing you've ever drank. all liquids acceptable. please tell me what it was, bonus points for why

[carby]

Hey whoa hi. Hello. I am looking directly into your ear canal. What do you mean you drank a tube of virus concentrate.

[whyamiherewhosummonedme]

So, I was working in a lab, right? My job in the lab was preparing a pure, concentrated enough sample of virus. This is tricky since, y'know, viruses require hosts to replicate, but you then need to get the host cells (and the pieces of the host cells that died!) out of the sample while still keeping the viruses. Once I'd finished and the samples had been sent to the database for analysis as well as a second one sent to be frozen for future reference, there was still some left over that needed to be disposed of.

I, knowing that this was a once in a lifetime opportunity, waited carefully for the lab director to be deep in conversation with someone else on the other side of the laboratory. And then I took my chance.

Test tubes, as it turns out, are really bad as shot glasses. Their shape turns any liquid inside into a stream, so you really can't knock it back quickly - it takes a couple seconds. Additionally, the best way I can describe the taste of virus concentrate was "sterile rot". A very unique kind of bad! Made worse by the test tube's inefficiency as a shot glass.

(by the way we were studying bacteriophages, not animal viruses. these viruses are too specialized on attacking prokaryotes to even recognize our cells as targets at all, according to studies.)

(but also like. if the viruses managed to successfully switch hosts and killed me with a violent infection, itd still be worth it.)

(for science.)

[violetthunderstorm]

You have a fitting blog title

[nico-the-overlord]

this post is getting 50k easy

[marlinspirkhall]

[subaru-copilot]

im so sorry that you're doomed by the narrative but i really need you to answer my message on Microsoft Teams

[depsidase]

[a-silly-poll-side-blog-yay]

do you have a hobby that's expensive as fuck

yes

no

all of them

absolutely 0!!!!

results

Voting ended onJun 30

[theoneofwhomisblue]

But here's the stomper

[notlikingbestgirl]

Out of Touch

[hustlerose]

Out of Touch Thursday

[bintro]