IDK What This Is

Alix | Any pronouns | LVL 18

[creativepromptsforwriting]

Sassy Dialogue

Part I

"Oh honey, if I wanted your opinion, I'd have rolled my eyes louder."

"Did you come here to be annoying or is that just a happy accident?"

"Please, your drama is exhausting and I only have one espresso left in me."

"It's cute that you would think that I'd care about what you have to say."

"I don't have time for this. My lip gloss is already drying."

"You talk a lot for someone with nothing to say."

"Congratulations! You just lost the argument and the plot."

"Is that confidence or just a delusion with a good contour?"

"You really committed to being wrong. That's dedication!"

"You say that like it's supposed to hurt my feelings. Cute."

"No, I'm not mad. I'm just trying to figure out how someone can be that wrong and still be alive."

"Wow. That was almost a valid point. Almost."

"If ignorance is bliss, you must be thriving."

"I've seen salad with more bite than that insult."

"You're not mysterious. You're just hard to tolerate."

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[despazito]

love my pumpkin

[despazito]

violence my pumpkin

[the-future-is-chrome]

the neurodivergent experience:

20% of the time: wowwieee!!! i love my passions and interests!!!!! they make me so happy i want to jump up and down!!!!! weee!!!!!!! :3333333333

80% of the time: this mind is a prison

[letsbelonelytogetherr]

i hope to possess the power of understanding what the actual fuck is wrong with me all the time

[ruhaniya]

I don't want a toxic on and off love. I want someone that chooses me everyday, even when I'm hard to deal with.

[memeuplift]

[important-cat-pics]

@important-cat-pics

[honeyfawns]

mid life crisis ? no no, mid DAY crisis. happens every day

[skribblegurl]

some people think writers are so eloquent and good with words, but the reality is that we can sit there with our fingers on the keyboard going, “what’s the word for non-sunlight lighting? Like, fake lighting?” and for ten minutes, all our brain will supply is “unofficial”, and we know that’s not the right word, but it’s the only word we can come up with…until finally it’s like our face got smashed into a brick wall and we remember the word we want is “artificial”.

[heywriters]

I couldn't remember the word "doorknob" ten minutes ago.

[bumblewyn]

ok but the onelook thesaurus will save your life, i literally could not live without this website

[breelandwalker]

REBLOG TO SAVE A WRITER'S LIFE

[myfairkatiecat]

LIFE SAVED

REBLOGGING TO SAVE ANOTHER WRITERS LIFE

[sirowsky]

I use this every time I sit down to write. It's the best tool in the world and I would be lost without it!

[bougiebutchbinch]

ranking the best things I have heard surgeons say mid-surgery:

1. "Five second rule!" while scrubbed, after dropping a sterile scalpel on the floor (no they did NOT pick it up again but I swear everyone's buttholes puckered)

2. (spoken during the closing of a particularly long and difficult case) "Nurse - my tunes." :heavy metal starts blasting:

3. Gently to a fretful patient, pre-anaesthesia: "It's going to be okay. I promise, I've dealt with worse." As soon as the patient is unconscious: "This is literally the worst thing I've ever seen."

4. [okay this one was a med student] "Wowwww, that's so gross!!" Reg: "Please remember that [patient] is awake for this procedure." Student to patient: "Oh my god. I am so sorry, that was really unprofessional - " Patient, cheerfully, also engrossed with what's happening inside them on the screen: "Nah - it's, like, super gross, right?"

5. [another procedure where the patient couldn't be put under GA] Patient: *starts singing country roads midway through the procedure* Surgeon: *shrugs and joins in with surprisingly good harmony*

[bougiebutchbinch]

okay okay there's more

6. Elderly surgeon to the anaesthetist who is gossipping with their reg: "I need you to pretend you're in church." [weirdest way to ask people to be quiet, but whatevs]

Anaethetist's new reg with big, horrified eyes: "You mean we should start praying???"

7. Panicking rad tech: "Uhhhh my machine broke. I need to jump on this part and kick it, but I am not paid enough if I break it. Can you - "

Surgeon, casual as: "Yeah, sure."

:violently beats up the C-arm until it starts pumping out those sweet, sweet x-rays:

8. ODP to theatre assistant: "Saw the new tasche earlier. Suits you."

Theatre assistant: "Thanks! it grew on me :)"

Surgeon, pleadingly, within accidental snipping distance of the patient's spinal cord: "Guys, do NOT make me laugh."

[bougiebutchbinch]

OH MY GOD I FORGOT -

9. Surgeon using the electrocauter, leaning over the incision and inhaling deeply: mmmmm, that smell always gets me hungry. I'm having barbeque tonight.

New med student: 👀

[bougiebutchbinch]

and the classique:

Spinal surgeon: hey, that scoli's getting bad. want me to fix it for ya?

Me: I mean. There's a pretty long wait list

Spinal surgeon: yeah but I could do it tonight

Me: that would be very illegal, Jeff

Spinal surgeon: only if they catch me

[my-random--thoughts-deactivated]

[evaconly]

every time this post comes across my page on a new platform i smile because we’re all just enjoying her adorable joy

[joy-and-whimsy-official]

“She matches her new blankie” is an official joy and whimsy post

[the-haiku-bot]

“She matches her new

blankie” is an official

joy and whimsy post

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[bambistjames]

non-writers will never understand the mental illness of writing an entire conversation in your head while doing dishes and then forgetting every word the second you open a blank doc

[vexheart]

[dicaeopolis]

astronomy club sent up a weather balloon w a gopro in it last friday. put in three packs of fruit snacks so they could have a giggle over eating fruit snacks that had been to space.

balloon went up into inner space, about 90,000 feet. came down right near the dinosaur park. a few physics teachers drive out to get it, crack it open on the way home to start watching the footage.

fruit snacks are missing.

multiple sources confirm that fruit snacks were put in balloon and sealed in with duct tape. physics teachers check entire balloon. no fruit snacks.

physics teachers watch footage. all 7 hours of it. right in the middle of footage, there are about 8 minutes of visual and audio static when balloon is in orbit. no other interference with balloon recorded.

conclusions: ???????

[spaceyalien]

aliens stole yo fruit snacks

[daisenseiben]

I’ve been a UFO enthusiast for 2/3rds of my life and this is the most convincing alien encounters story I have ever heard.

[should-be-sleeping]

[dicaeopolis]

Happy just-over-ten-years to this post. Early in its life, it was viewed by a seventeen-year-old aspiring astronomer who DESPISED it, thought it was the dumbest Space Post ever, got mad every time it crossed her dash. But this wasn’t anybody I knew, and she did the mature thing and didn’t send any hate mail about it, and went off and got her whole entire astrophysics degree without me ever finding out. So how do I know about this person’s deep dislike for this post? BECAUSE. I have, at press time, been sleeping next to her for three and a half years

[snommelp]

[gaanata9]

[californiagoddess]

[loganslowdown4]

My favourite part of any incorrect quotes video is when Thomas can’t quite keep it together LMAO

[pret-boy]

Matching your freak is beautiful and all but what you really need is a boy who's infatuated with your freak. Down bad for your freak. Deeply intrigued by your freak. Eager to see more of your freak. Supportive of your freak. Gets bricked up witnessing your freak, even.