dream on, strawberry shortcake

she/her | bi | enfp | weird stuff my sleep deprived friends say as incorrect quotes | main: purplegrapefruit

[jinanya]

Amy: Jake was banned from the chicken shack, so we had to go out of town to get some.

Jake: Well, they shouldn’t say “all you can eat” if they don’t mean it.

Amy: Jake, you ate a chair.

[incorrectsb99]

Every found family show has:

Jake: an asshole with a heart of gold and self esteem issues

Charles: really sweet character who's capable of murder and also have self esteem issues

Amy: incredibly cool character who is the only one with a braincell

Gina: sassy and hiding pain

Rosa: furious bisexual

Holt: only one capable of keeping a plant alive

Terry: emotional support himbo

[incorrectsb99]

OMG YOU GUYS 305 FOLLOWERS THIS IS AMAZING THANK YOU SO SO MUCH I DONT DESERVE THIS LOVE💜💜💜💜

[incorrectsb99]

CONGRATULATIONS TO STEPHANIE BEATRIZ ON HER FIRST PREGNANCY!!!

[incorrectsb99]

Jake: From now on we'll be using code names, you can address me as eagle one

Jake: Amy, code name, been there done that

Jake: Rosa is currently doing that

Jake: Gina is it happened once in a dream

Jake: Charles, if i had to pick a dude

Jake: Terry, Eagle two

Terry: Oh thank god

[incorrectsb99]

new icon for pride month!!!!

happy pride for all my lovely lgbtqpia+ people!! love y'all so much, feel free to consult with me if you're questioning or just want to talk things out💜🏳️‍🌈

[incorrectsb99]

hi!

i'm sorry for not being really active (not active at all oops) for the past week or so, my life is pretty crazy right now. i have a HUGE math exam tomorrow so I'm studying my ass off, and things are going batshit crazy in my country atm.

(I'm from israel and everything is fucked up here. I'd like to keep this blog as far away from politics as possible, so if you wanna say something related or attack me or whatever, idgaf, contact me on @purplegrapefruit , i will not answer any political question on this blog. unfollow this blog rn if you want i really don't care if me being an israeli hurts your ego or something)

anyway, i hope to post more content soon!!

lots of love, from your chaotic b99 stan💜

[incorrectsb99]

Amy: hey look at this knife, what do you think?

Charles: nice knife, what do you need it for?

Rosa: murder?

[incorrectsb99]

Rosa: describe the perfect date.

Adrian: That’s a tough one. I’d have to say April 25th. Because it’s not too hot and not too cold. All you need is a light jacket.

[amystiago]

dear sister, by the time you read this i’ll be dead

[incorrectsb99]

GET OUT

[incorrectsb99]

Rosa: the vulture really seem to hate us.

Gina: maybe he's homophobic

Rosa: we're not a couple gina

Gina: we're not?

Jake: you're not?

[incorrectsb99]

Jake and Rosa: Regularly say fuck

Amy: Has sworn off saying fuck but said it at some point

Terry: has not said fuck before, can do if desired

Holt: has not said fuck before and refuses to say it

Gina: says fuck only for the ✨drama✨

Hitchcock: says nothing but fuck

Scully: says fudge or duck instead

Charles: legally cannot say fuck

[incorrectsb99]

Rosa: *kicks the G off of a graveyard sign*

Rosa: let's get this party started

[incorrectsb99]

Ok so i have a question, do you want me to tag certain tws/nsfw-ish posts? I try no to post very explicit content on here, but if any of you feel the need PLEASE DON'T BE AFRAID TO ASK ME. YOUR LIFE AND COMFORT MATTER MORE THAN A FEW MINUTES OF TAGGING ALL POSTS.

Just please send a reply, a dm or an ask of what content triggered you, and I'll make sure to tag it in the future and retroactively!

[incorrectsb99]

Terry: *about a book he read* and these vampires bit people for fun, just because they enjoy it.

Jake: that's so cool! What even are these vampires?

Rosa: kinky.

[incorrectsb99]

HOLY SHIT YOU GUYS

I love you so much!! Just wanted you to know how much i appreciate each like, reblog and follower, you truly make me feel happy and seen and i love you!

THANK YOU💜

[slavery]

[macbethz]

Fuck I’m at a fencing tournament and literally a minute after I reblogged this my dad told me that he talked to the point people and I’m probably going to win a medal.

[seananmcguire]

BURN BAGEL BURN

[gothiccharmschool]

OH WHY NOT?

[harukami]

I need to follow up to say I reblogged this last night, and this morning I got some of the best news of my life, like, a life dream come true news thing.

Bagel what are your powers

[acabosetotal]

FUCK, I though it was just another lucky meme but LISTEN. Since a week ago I was waiting a phone call to confirm me if I got a job or not in my university. I reblogged this yesterday’s night “just for fun and because I don’t want any bagel to be mad with me”, and today’s afternoon, while I was losing my time as always, the professor I was supposed to work with called me and asked me for my personal information to start working with her.

THE BAGEL POWERS ARE WAY TOO MUCH FOR THIS WORLD

[token-white-friend]

I GOT A JOB THE DAY AFTER MY QUEUE POSTED THIS THE FIRST TIME AND I JUST REALIZED IT WHEN I SAW IT AGAIN HOLY GOD

[noodle-dragon]

The bagel hasn’t let me down yet!

[blackcatgodess]

I got a job offer after reblogging the bagel. Believe in the bagel!

[anayely420]

🙏🏼

[sonsfantasies]

Worth a try lol

[theblizzardsix]

i could use some good news or even a good girl 

[pantspooplover]

Go lil bagle! Show me your power!

[itaachiyama-moved]

Okii then!

[blastlight]

THIS IS THE FIRST THING ON MY BLOG

I GOT ASKED OUT FOR THE FIRST TIME AFTER I REBLOGGED IT

[cuappatea-deactivated20200216]

wait but whats happening with the bagel tho

[dukemz]

It’s burning, as is everything I’ve hoped for whenever I’ve reblogged a post like this

[gone-dw-abt-it-deactivated20260]

I just kinda wanna watch something burn?

[dukemz]

Mood

[rip-paramour]

You guys didn’t listen when I said Bagels hold an ancient and wonderous power.

[teathattast]

Bagel time

[castielismyhusband2266]

I need this

[dwintu]

do it

[robinswraith]

I’m at an all time low I need this

[magnus-chase-rights]

ok sure

[soulful-guy-deactivated20251026]

no loss in trying. so here wo go

[skeleton-deactivated694225]

😌👀

[anxietyfilledvoidfrog]

Its bagel time. I believe in you bagel. 🥯

[aleijaiiiii]

Ok so.

Last time I reblogged this, I was complaining to my mum how I never got to go on walks alone. Then, she legit said to me, “well why don’t you go down to *censored*?” Which she’d never let me do before. I had three hours. In a place half an hour from home. It works.

[thatonepanperson-deactivated202]

I need all the luck i can get

[spiderways-a-vampire]

(*-*)

[literallylmm]

Uhhhh worth a try

[batpeggy21]

I doubt it will work but….

[marsieonlife]

i dont lose anything trying…

[diya-a510-deactivated20200919]

BAGEL

[marsieonlife]

again, YES?!

[marsieonlife]

OK SO I DID THIS ON THE MORNING AND GUESS WHAT HAPPENED AT SCHOOL? 

TWO TESTS WERE CANCELLED!

NO HOMEWORK!!

WE HAD A BREAK OF 30 MINUTES (we normally have a break of 5-10 min)

AND MY CRUSH ASKED ME TO WORK ON A PROJECT WITH HIM!!!

I don’t know how you do it bagel, but you’re awesome!

[sleepy-sho]

Bagel time

[nucleariguana]

guys the more you add text to your reblogs the more time it takes to reblog, therefore stealing our good news

[thunderbutt]

Bagel power.

[pechorinssis]

I need some good news so fuck it

[sir-william-hoe]

Bagel

[vive-la-revolution]

it’s

bagel time

[cappuccyno-inactive]

i trust the random bagel

[incorrectsb99]

I could use some good news now, so fuck it I'm in