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bonivers

“at least i have a man” is always the weakest flex bc 80% of the time their man sucks and no one else wants him anyway

bonivers

“at least i have a man” and i give you my condolences but what does that have to do with anything ever

mortimermcmirestinks

problem: the bus is about to drive over a cliff.

solution: take up a vote about what we should do.

the votes:

Group A: 4 people who say we should drive over a cliff.

Group B: 3 people who say that we probably shouldn't do that.

Group C: 2 people who abstain from voting, because 1) the fact that those guys from Group A exist means that the bus is doomed anyway, 2) the people from Group B sound real fuckin' wishy-washy (we "probably" shouldn't do that? come on, man), 3) we should never have gotten into this situation in the first place, and 4) all seven of those other people are dicks. one member of Group B is a serial killer! and another member of Group B says that he watches bus crashes on YouTube for fun! of COURSE Group C don't want the bus to go over a cliff, are you crazy? they just think that we need to take actual genuine action instead of just voting. why the fuck is the bus driver locked away in a private cabin and demanding people vote on this, anyway? that's not how buses are supposed to work! the fuck is wrong with him? we should break into that cabin and wrest control of the bus away from that guy. and hey, maybe everyone on this bus deserves to die in a crash, ever think of that? in any case, history will surely look kindly on Group C, who stuck by their morals and didn't allow th--

results: "drive over a cliff" wins. all nine passengers die. when the bodies are analyzed, nobody can tell what part of the bloody crumpled mass was a part of Group A and what part was a part of Group C. "serves those nine idiots right," people say, "that's what you get for all voting to drive over a cliff"

hyperions-light

Michigan Porn Ban Bill & What To Do About It

Here is an article about the bill, introduced to the Michigan State House on 9/11/2025, and the text of the bill: CBS Article, Bill PDF

This bill would prohibit:

The depiction of sexual acts in any manner, including written and of fictional characters

The "depiction, description, or simulation, whether real, animated, digitally generated, written, or auditory, that includes a disconnection between biology and gender by an individual of biological sex imitating, depicting, or representing himself or herself to be of the other biological sex by means of a combination of attire, cosmetology, or prosthetics, or as having a reproductive nature contrary to the individual's biological sex." Meaning any representation of Trans people or GNC people.

"The promotion or sale of circumvention tools to access prohibited material" meaning VPNs.

It is extremely important that this bill receives strong pushback from residents of Michigan. Because it is abhorrent in its rhetoric, censorious, and because if it passes (and potentially, even if it doesn't) it is likely that the GOP will attempt to replicate the bill in other state legislatures (if they are not already doing so).

If you live in Michigan, here is what you can do:

Contact your STATE LEGISLATORS. This means your representatives in the Michigan House and Michigan Senate. These are the individuals with direct power over this bill, NOT your representatives to the national House and Senate.

Here is a website that will help you locate your representatives. It will also provide you with their contact information.

It is PARTICULARLY IMPORTANT that you contact your House Representatives if they are Josh Schriver (District 66, covering parts of Oakland, Washington, Addison, Oxford); Joseph Pavlov (District 64, parts of Sarnia and surrounding); Matt Maddock (District 51, incl Highland, Milford and surrounding); James DeSana (District 29, incl Flat Rock, Berlin, the area outside of Monroe); Joseph Fox (District 101, incl parts of Cadillac, Fremont, Big Rapids); Jennifer Wortz (District 35, incl Coldwater, Hillsdale and surrounding). These are the bill's sponsors.

It is also important that if you live in their districts you contact Sarah Lightner (District 45), Brian BeGole (Dist 71), Tyrone Carter (Dist 1), Douglas Wozniak (Dist 59), Mike Harris (Dist 52), Jay DeBoyer (Dist 63), Gina Johnson (Dist 78), Bill Schuette (Dist 95), Kara Hope (Dist 74), Kelly Breen (Dist 21), and Helena Scott (Dist 8), who are the members of the Michigan State House Judiciary Committee, which is where the bill has been referred. The bill must make it out of the committee before it can be voted on on the floor.

It is possible that the Republicans in particular will not listen to you, HOWEVER you can make their lives hell over this bill. You can make this bill and others like it VERY undesirable to sponsor in future by calling, emailing, faxing, and sending physical letters.

Resources for contacting your legislators: 5 calls, ResistBot

It is also likely that the local Democratic Party offices will organize against this bill. You can build coalition with them (or any parties/organizations left of them) and move to defeat the bill. It is likely that LGBTQ organizations will also organize to resist the bill, possibly building coalition with ISPs and VPN providers, whose business would be seriously impacted by the passage of the bill. You may also look out for information from the Attorney General of Michigan's office, as they would be forced to enact the prohibitions.

If you are outside of MI, the most useful thing you can do is probably spread the word, volunteer time with local organizations to help with resistance actions (if they request volunteers from out of state), or donate money to local advocacy networks interested in opposing the bill.

imagymnasia

Okay no I got really pissed so I wrote to my reps IMMEDIATELY (boss makes a dollar, I make a dime, so I write political emails on company time) If anyone needs a jumping point, here's what I wrote.

I was horrified to learn about the existence of HB-4938. This bill is an affront to freedom of speech—once again, the GOP stands behind the flimsy premise of "protecting children" to enforce harmful purity culture and label valid adult human expression as obscene and criminal. I am especially appalled by the second category, which states it would be a crime to depict, in ANY way, media "that includes a disconnection between biology and gender by an individual." This is a clear attack on the transgender, nonbinary, and intersex communities, whom the GOP continues to scapegoat instead of standing on real American issues like gun control, education, supporting local economy and small businesses, environmental concerns, and more. Censorship and the limitation of free speech has no place in our communities, our state, or our nation. I urge you to vote against this bill, and strike down this and further attempts to hobble Michiganders' right to freedom of expression. Not only do we all have an obligation to defend our marginalized neighbors, but we know this will not stop until ALL media is aligned with GOP values, and anything to the contrary is criminalized, penalized, and crushed. Listen to your constituents. Michigan does not want this, and we do not want what comes after should this pass. Put this bill to rest and please, please urge your colleagues to do the same.

hyperions-light

Wonderful work! Thank you for sharing & giving people something to jump off of!

If you are writing or speaking to a Republican (all of the sponsors and a large portion of the Judiciary Committee), here are some further talking points you can bring up:

The bill would cost an enormous amount of money to implement (even though they want to fund it through the fines, all of the infrastructure for implementation must be created first), and it would force the already overworked Attorney General’s office to commit a huge amount of time and labor to enforcement. It would be a waste of money and effort.

The bill requires that the law go into effect 90 days after it is signed. This is not enough time to build the regulatory apparati required by the law. Most businesses who are impacted by the law will simply choose to leave instead of complying. This has the potential to impede Michiganders’ business interests and hamper the ability of the citizenry to live normally.

Because it requires compliance from business interests and constant monitoring, it would make Michigan a less attractive place for profitable, emerging technological enterprises. The draconian strictures will drive potential and current businesses out of Michigan and hurt the economy/future economic prospects.

I want to emphasize that this is an extremely winnable fight. Do not give up.

The bill has not even reached the House floor yet. There are many steps it is required to pass before it could even make it to the governor’s desk. Do not panic or spread defeatism. Organize, build coalition, and act.

Rereading The Hunger Games books has made me realize something. A good piece of media makes me think about what it would be like to be a character in that story, in that world. I pictured myself at Hogwarts and in Resident Evil’s Raccoon City and as a Warrior Sister and as a Runner in The Glade, and as various other people in various other fictional places, fighting monsters and dragons and the evils of the world in many forms of media for as long as I can remember.

The one thing I never pictured myself in was The Hunger Games. I never wrote one shots about Panem, in fact it’s probably the only piece of media I have never consumed a single fanfic about. Not only did it feel wrong but I plain didn’t want to.

Katniss told us what it was like in a way that left very little to the imagination. Yes, she’s kinda obtuse in some instances but she’s also a literal teenage girl and as a prior literal teenage girl, sometimes you overthink the things that don’t matter and underthink the things that do.

The point is: Suzanne Collins did a really good job writing a piece of media that forces you to experience the story in a way that I’m not sure many others do. Yes, you experience the story but I feel like Collins was very effective in making you feel it too. She told the story and made you feel it, made you understand it. You witnessed all of the brutal and unholy horrors that the Capitol subjected each of the districts to. She didn’t allow for a single word to be wasted over-explaining to the point of boredom and she certainly didn’t allow you to look away from the monstrosity.

I’ll admit, I fell victim to the “the new books are a cash grab” mindset when Ballad was released, although I did borrow it from a friend a few weeks after release and ate my words for it. Granted, the narrator was the most unlikable character in the entire series so it’s not one I can really say I enjoyed. But the story was consistent with the original trilogy and the change from first person to third person was masterfully executed and a very interesting (in a good way) stylistic choice. Perhaps I brushed it off and didn’t give myself as much time to digest it as I did the original three, and maybe one day I will and I’ll decide I like it more.

However, Sunrise on the Reaping really sealed it for me. I think it is easily the best book in the entire series. And even then. Even laying beside Maysilee and Hamitch in the bed of katniss in the arena, even then I never thought, “I wonder what that would be like.”

Because Suzanne told us, and Katniss told us, and Haymitch told us, and, hell, even in his own twisted and distorted way, Coriolanus Snow told us:

“This is not what you want.”

And I never did.

Or maybe I’m just overthinking things again.

technofeudalism

i think the near-extinction of people making fun, deep and/or unique interactive text-based browser games, projects and stories is catastrophic to the internet. i'm talking pre-itch.io era, nothing against it.

there are a lot of fun ones listed here and here but for the most part, they were made years ago and are now a dying breed. i get why. there's no money in it. factoring in the cost of web hosting and servers, it probably costs money. it's just sad that it's a dying art form.

anyway, here's some of my favorite browser-based interactive projects and games, if you're into that kind of thing. 90% of them are on the lists that i linked above.

A Better World - create an alternate history timeline

Alter Ego - abandonware birth-to-death life simulator game

Seedship - text-based game about colonizing a new planet

Sandboxels or ThisIsSand - free-falling sand physics games

Little Alchemy 2 - combine various elements to make new ones

Infinite Craft - kind of the same as Little Alchemy

ZenGM - simulate sports

Tamajoji - browser-based tamagotchi

IFDB - interactive fiction database (text adventure games)

Written Realms - more text adventure games with a user interface

The Cafe & Diner - mystery game

The New Campaign Trail - US presidential campaign game

Money Simulator - simulate financial decisions

Genesis - text-based adventure/fantasy game

Level 13 - text-based science fiction adventure game

Miniconomy - player driven economy game

Checkbox Olympics - games involving clicking checkboxes

BrantSteele.net - game show and Hunger Games simulators

Murder Games - fight to the death simulator by Orteil

Cookie Clicker - different but felt weird not including it. by Orteil.

if you're ever thinking about making a niche project that only a select number of individuals will be nerdy enough to enjoy, keep in mind i've been playing some of these games off and on for 20~ years (Alter Ego, for example). quite literally a lifetime of replayability.

technofeudalism

since this post blew up, i've been wanting to do an addition with all of the recommendations from the comments and tags. but there's a lot of them. some people might be crazy enough to sit down and seriously put them all in one post with descriptions. those people are honestly sick in the head.

anyway, here's all of the recommendations from the reblogs. not all of them are text-based, but it's a great mixture of styles. also don't forget the links in the second paragraph of the OP which will take you to FMHY where there are a bunch more games listed.

Games

A Dark Room - text-based science fiction role-playing game.

corru.observer - science fiction adventure web game.

Improbable Island - old-school text adventure game.

Candy Box 2 - incremental clicker game that evolves into RPG.

Arcanum - open source wizard clicker game.

sandspiel, Powder Game, Powder Game 2, The Powder Toy - more sand physics games.

Orb.Farm - fishtank simulator.

Façade - experimental game with a real-time interactive narrative where you try to fix a failing marriage.

The Catacombs of Solaris - trippy art game.

Yume Nikki Online - online version of the surreal classic plus fangames.

The Barncle Goose Experiment - combine element/alchemy game based on antique theories of abiogenesis.

Fallen London - free-to-play text-based open world RPG.

Nested - very unique text-based universe expanding game. described as possibly @orteil42's favorite thing he's ever made.

The Process of Elimination - interactive web novel (by @hypertextdog)

Discworld MUD - multiplayer, text-based, online game (a MUD, or text MMORPG) based on the Discworld books.

Horse Master - surreal text game about training a horse.

EYEZMAZE - flash (RIP) or HTML5-based puzzle games.

You Are Jeff Bezos - text game. spend Jeff Bezos' fortune.

The Password Game - challenging puzzle game where you have to meet password requirements (by neal)

Universal Paperclips - incremental paperclip making game.

Half-Earth - planetary disaster planning game where you try to save the world using socialism.

ChooseYourStory - community-driven website centered on CYOA style story games.

PhD Simulator - random event based text game. make your choice each month and see if you can graduate on time.

Dungeon Crawl Stone Soup - open source roguelike.

Cataclysm: Dark Days Ahead - turn-based survival roguelike set in the modern day.

Nethack - open source roguelike originally released in 1987.

FarmRPG - simple, mobile-friendly, text-based farming RPG.

Kingdom of Loathing - browser-based community MMORPG.

PokeRogue - browser-based Pokemon roguelike

Tools

Text Game Builder - works in your browser, with just a little bit of Python (by @grumpygandalf)

Twine - great (free!) tool for making text-based games quickly.

Ink - scripting language for interactive fiction (also free)

Flashpoint Archive - a community effort to preserve games and animations from the web.

PICO-8 - fantasy console for making, sharing and playing tiny games and other computer programs.

Non-Games

Library of Babel - interactive illustration which attempts to simulate what it might be like to browse The Library of Babel.

Superbad - technically not a game, sprawling website full of secrets.

17776 - serialized speculative fiction multimedia narrative about football in the far-future. beautiful, creative, legendary. created by Jon Bois, a legend and one of my favorite writers of all time.

Choice of Games - text-based, choose-your-own-adventure games (interactive fiction). some free-to-play, others can be bought like an ebook.

The Deep Sea - scroll to the bottom of the ocean. encounter the humble squid and his friends (by neal)

Space Elevator - like The Deep Sea, but up instead of down. you can equip your avatar with a scarf (by neal)

Internet Artifacts - an interactive history of the early internet (by neal)

If The Moon Were Only One Pixel - scroll through an accurately scaled model of the universe.

r/incremental_games - reddit community for incremental games.

r/WebGames - reddit community for web games in general.

thank you to everyone who contributed and the creators. please be sure to show them some love where possible.

monchursouls

Reblogging the update too

Just had a dream about a random person stuck in a tv show similar to both Punk’d and The Truman Show who was being followed around by secret cameras and they were introducing a bunch of celebrities to them (like they “ran into” Justin Bieber at the shops and like Kristen Bell at a coffee shop) with celebrities of increasing levels of fame. Except the person wasn’t reacting at all to these super famous celebrities and the plot of the show was “random person meets the worlds top 50 famous people, lets see how they react” so the show execs pulled it except they didn’t tell the entire crew so this one cameraman was still following this person around recording until the person actually met Steve from Blue’s Clues and broke down crying, super excited to meet their childhood hero and Steve was stoked to meet a fan. Cameraman got some great footage of the meeting and sent it to the director who was like “how does this person not know nor react to meeting Beyoncé, Taylor Swift, Bill Nye, Barack Obama, nor Shaq but they know Steve from Blue’s Clues?”

#i’m still sleepy #I apologize for mistakes #anyways goodnight again #blues clues #steve from blues clues #weird dreams

Going over to cat owner’s houses is so funny bc some of them are normal like “kitty hates people and will hide” and some are like “kitty likes to bite toes so keep your socks on” and such

But then there are some that are absolutely unhinged like “every time you enter the room with Senior Chief Whiskers, you must come to a complete stop, turn to face him, and give him a salute for no less than three seconds or he will attempt to murder you.”

#cats #cat owners #idk how to tag this #cat memes #silly cat things

rnismatch

Otra víctima el Chupacabra

mellointheory

Who makes the porn bots. Where do they come from. What do they hope to achieve.

the-haiku-bot

Who makes the porn bots.

Where do they come from. What do

they hope to achieve.

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

mellointheory

and what about you, little haiku bot? do you feel kinship with your brethren? do you understand them? they speak words of enticement and seek love, but are met with disdain. you only parrot the words that cross your screen, but we all love you. or rather, since all you do is reflect us, maybe we simply love ourselves through you.

do you understand them, do you wish you could speak to us like they do? if you found your own voice, would we still care for you?

the-haiku-bot

My voice repeats what

you all say: I love you I

love you I love you.

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

y-kasa-deactivated20240228

Perfectly matching and replicating colors just by seeing them is an art, and, while it's also a very useful task, people who can do this are primarily artists.

Massimo / X

fish-fido

Wow.

cuprohastes

Yeah but no but yeah -- Look he didn't just colour match it, he also added in the turbulence medium, the clearcoat and the correct metallic flecks... for a paint that will dry a lighter shade than when it goes on.

That's like being served an entire thanksgiving meal made my one person in 45 minutes and then saying "Oh they made me a snack": It is radically underselling what this person can do.

the-oddest-inkling

Watch Warrior Nun, they said. It will be fun, they said. It won't trigger your Catholic Guilt for being queer at all, they said.

But also have I never watched a show that handled the topic of Catholic Guilt in regards to being queer and Catholic so well and with so much respect. Kudos to the writers honestly.

previoustags

This is honest to god the funniest thing I have ever seen in my entire life

karma-crystal

This 1️⃣ goes out to all the horny 💏 couples out there who are thinking 🤔 of getting rowdy 🔞 this 💌Valentines💮 day evening: 👍 👎DO ❌️ NOT👍 👎 If you do your child 🧒 will be born 👏 a ♏SCORPIO♏ Now, why ❓️ don’t ❌️ we like Scorpio's♏? For starters, “Scorpio” has 7️⃣ letters 🔠. 7️⃣ letters 🔠: 7️⃣ deadly ☠️ sins ✝️ 🙅‍♀ Now, what are the 7️⃣ deadly ☠️ sins? Wrath, Sloth, Gluttony, Envy 👏👏 Envy is associated with the color GREEN 💚 What else is green 💚? Marijuana. Just 1️⃣ more pothead in the world 🗺️. LAME. Now where is pot 🍲 legal? Canada 🇨🇦, Washington, Colorado, Oregon, Alaska, airplane ✈️ bathrooms if the pilot’s 👨‍✈️ chill. And where can 🥫 planes ✈️ take you? California 🕶. And what’s on California’s state flag 🚩? A BEAR 🐻. Your child 🧒. Is gay 👨‍❤️‍👨.