Another verdance rp for @creative-life-event ! Credits to Cael/star for the other half of this, and tw for angst >:3
Verdance was sitting outside of Stars base, just like she had the last night, fireing arrows through her window. The threats were one thing, but crow? Star had officially taken things too far.
Verdance sucked in a breath, and with one hand on her axe, kicked down the door.
“Star I know you’re here!”
Verdances voice dropped “Now get out here, and let’s talk.”
Star freezes from where she was warming herself by the furnace at the sound of breaking glass.
She moves to the room, watching arrow after arrow lodge itself in the ground. Then a voice, Verdance's.
I guess we're doing this.
"What do you want Verdance."
Star speaks as she leans on the door, glaring at the person in front of her.
“And you broke Crows chest with that arrow.” Verdance snarled. “You broke my trust, and more importantly, you broke a promise. You swore Star, you swore! You promised we were a team, in it for the long haul, and you killed me.”
*Like an animal. Slaughtered from behind, like cattle, Verdance had been killed*
“As for why I’m here, I’m here for my apology.”
it was childish, and foolish to march in here and demand somthing from Star, but to demand that?
It was exactly what Verdance wanted. All her life she was bowing and hiding and saying her sorries, and just once, she wanted to be the one to say, ‘I forgive you.’
Right. She'd already almost forgotten about killing Crow. Or- not forgotten. Tried to.
"That promise was from before. It's a new start. I don't owe you anything, not even a second of my time."
Maybe she feels a little bit bad. Crow was on yellow. Now they're red. But it was justified. Fallen had been relentlessly torturing Deimi, and she wanted revenge.
"I won't apologize. You know how this game goes. People fight. No one apologizes. Even less the people cursed. I did what I had to do and that's that."
“You had to go after a yellow?” Verdance asked. “That’s bullshit Star, you know it. And fine, new game, new rules, you don’t owe me anything. That’s true.”
Verdance was laying out on a cot, her head throbbing. She groaned, reaching a hand to her stomach and feeling cotton against her fingertips. Her organs felt fragile underneath the sheet, fake sterile skin hiding the ugly truth of what had been done.
“H-hey Mark, where are the painkillers?” Verdance choked out, sitting up slightly, making eye contact with a man in white uniform. She always got a sedater after a bad fight.
“Kid, after that loss we’re short on sponsors. The arena won’t pay out of pocket for anything unnecessary and the budget has been put into advertisement.”
“What about my boss? He-“
“He went out, told me to take care of you.”
“P-please, can’t you do somthi-“
“I told you.” He didn’t snap or yell, simply turned away back to his computer.
“I made the arena 23k in fights last night, there’s gotta be something-
“The money is in advertisements. I’m not going to apologize, you know how this goes. People fight.”
He smiled grimly, and Verdance looked past him, spotting the sealed bottle of painkillers beside his computer. They were for better fighters, who didn’t loose sponsors and didn’t need an apology.
Verdance snapped back to reality, meeting Stars eyes.
“Not again.” Verdance murmured to herself, tail twitching. “Im not doing this again.”
“You are going to say sorry, or you’re going to die.”
this is what power felt like. This was getting what you wanted, this was being in control
"Then I'll die. But I won't let you take my life easily. Fighting's what you were always good at."
Dying. She's forgotten what it feels like to die. Blood flowing out of her, pooling all over... No. Star won't let Verdance be the first to take her life.
She watches Verdance- axe out, tail twitching. Is that what she looked like last game? So angry?
Pulling out her own axe, she lets her hand slide down the handle and into it's familiar grooves for the first time this game. If this is what Verdance wants, it's what she'll get.
“Yep, you’re going to die.” Verdance agreed, stepping forward. “Exactly the way you’d should have.”
Verdance threw her axe at Stars feet, feeling a satisfied twinge as it skidded to a stop near her boot. Verdance pulled a needle from her pocket with her tail, stabbing it violently into Stars ankle. She jumped back before Star could react
“You don’t deserve a fair fight or a duel.”
*and maybe then you’ll be sorry, writhing on the floor. Maybe the person with the antidote might deserve your sorry.*
Verdance pulled a vial full of golden liquid out of her pocket.
“An antidote to wither poison is hard to come by.” verdance mused. “So you might want to take this from me.”
She held it out to star, and then yanked it back.
“But first.” Verdance chided, gaze cold. “My sorry.”
Maybe Star was immune to the poison, then plan B of fight with axe was fine. But Verdance wanted to be in power now. She wanted to hold that antidote above stars head, her own little bottle of painkiller, and feel what it was to be strong
Star drops to her knees, poison spreading throughout her body as she tries to hold herself up through the pain. She reaches for the golden vial before the other snatches it away.
Every inch of her is burning. A thousand times she refused to stop, a hundred times she pushed too far, ten times she left, and once she lost someone far too close to her.
But now she can't stop. It's Star's grave and she'll lay in it.
"You called me a coward. Now I think it describes you best."
She laughs dryly and coughs, it's so close to before. A mirror image twisted.
Gritting her teeth, she grabs an arrow from her quiver as pain wracks through her arm. Bringing it forward, she attempts to knock the bottle out of Verdance's hand. It doesn't work. Of course.
Star stares up into her eyes, glaring, sparking in the fire combing it's way through her body.
Does Verdance care? Star doesn't.
That's what she tells herself. That this doesn't hurt. The tear between them didn't split her heart in half. And she doesn't care.
**Star doesn't owe Verdance anything.**
*No, I’m no coward, how dare she, how dare she call me a coward.|| I have fought people twice my size, I have bled out under the sun, I have shoved my own organs back in, fighting to live.|| I am a gladiator, and I am stronger than she will ever be.*
*“Oh verdance”* Foli whispered again, forcing her way back into Verdances head. *”you were never much of a gladiator.*”
No, that was a lie. Verdance was a gladiator, because if she wasn’t a gladiator she was nothing. And if she was nothing, then Star hadn’t done anything wrong by hurting her. And if Star hadn’t done anything wrong then Verdance was standing here killing an innocent when she has the cure right there in her hand.
“Star I’m sor-“ Verdance blurted, barking out a curse. “I-“
*you promised to never kill again. You swore..*
Verdance stared down at star, her broken, twisted, oh so stubborn mirror image.
She swallowed hard, and steeled her nerves.”
“I didn’t want you to die on this hill.” Verdance forced out.
She raised the vial higher, preparing to break it on the floor. She hesitated, letting Stars life, Verdances oath, hang in the air above her.
She didn't want Star to die on this hill. The hill. The one she built with the dirt while digging her own grave.
She didn't want to hurt Verdance. She didn't want to hurt anyone.
No one was supposed to get hurt.
She isn't sorry. Verdance isn't sorry. No one is.
And it stays that way. Going around in circles- death and revenge and death again.
Pain radiates through Star's body. sending her even further to the floor. Just a couple minutes left to live. She breathes in, ragged and painful.
"I was right. You will be my downfall."
Quoting Verdance herself, she stares at the vial held above her head.
"Good luck forgetting this."
Verdance stared down at Star, forcing back the nausea burning in her gut. The vial shook in her hand, liquid salvation sloshing back and forth.
*I don’t need to be sorry.* Verdance thought, trying to steel her nerves. *its a death game, and never once had anyone stuck their neck out for me. I’ve been used, and hurt, and betrayed. And this time I’m going to stay angry.*
Verdance raised the bottle another inch, her chest rattling, tail quivering between her legs. She expected that fire in her gut to die. She expected the power to feel good. She wanted-
“Star I’m sorry!” Verdance blurted, and she dropped to her knees. She popped the vial open with her teeth, spitting the cap onto the ground. When Stars hands didn’t tighten around the gift, Verdance tilted her head back, gently coaxing the liquid into her mouth with shaking hands.
Tears bubbled in her eyes.
*Star was right, I am a coward*
Her heartbeat is slowing. Star can hear it in her head.
The world bubbles in her vision, whether it's the poison or tears... It's indistinguishable to her. Everything feels the same.
That radiating poison. Pushing it's way to her extremities and leaving nothing behind. Nothing but pain and hurt and anything but hope.
Verdance drops into her vision, three, five, seven versions of her spinning around. Her lips are moving but Star can't hear her. Can't seem to move her hands and grab the golden vial to save herself. She can't tell Verdance to stop when her head goes back and the warm liquid drips down her throat.
Then coughing. Spluttering, rasping, painful coughing. A spike of pain.
She sits there in Verdance's lap. Just breathing.
Now Star can see it's tears.
Verdance watched her tears, silent and still drip onto the sides of Stars face. Unconsciously Verdance wrapped her tail around Stars leg, squeezing tight, trying to anchor her to this world.
“I’m sorry.” Verdance sobbed, squeezing her eyes tight. “You’re right, I know you are. And you don’t owe me a thing, nobody does.”
Verdance caught a glimpse of her hand, that thick, burned in number in her palm. Exactly how many lives she’d taken, and how many sorries she owed the world. Star… Star did the world a service by bringing Verdance closer to what she deserved.
And all that death for what? To pay medical bills? To get her mother out of poverty? her brother still died, and her mother still left.
“I’ll go now, if thats what you want.” Verdance whispered, slowly unwrapping her tail from Stars leg. Her anchor was slipping and Verdance could feel the fall, quick and overwhelming.
She didn’t want to leave.
Verdance would rather die than walk out that door.
Staring up at Verdance, Star reaches up with shaking hands and wipes the tears off of her face.
She whispers the words, so small she's not even sure they're heard. Some part of her feels Verdance's tail leave and wants it to stay. The crazy part. But that's okay, isn't it? To want someone you can trust, even when everything else tells you it's a bad idea.
Pushing herself up, Star wipes her own tears, only able to see clearly for a second before they come welling back.
They're both sitting in the doorway, half inside, half out. Maybe it's a metaphor. One for what they've become. A halfway point. A marker for what can keep going. A heart ripped and sewn back together.
Verdance looks at Star, sitting on her knees with drippy eyes. She wants to stay. She wants to keep this friendship and live a full life. She wants-
She never got that sorry, and somthing deep inside her thought she deserved it
“Hey Star.” Verdance started, cautious and quiet. “Did… did you have anything you wanted to tell me?”
Verdance had no idea why she was so stuck on this, but she needed it
Star tilts her head, slightly confused.
What was Verdance looking for? An apology again? If so... she's not ready to yet.
Either way, Verdance is with her now. So she should make the most of it, even if she just almost killed her.
,Star moves forward quickly, hugging Verdance and rocking them both, almost toppling over.
Why. Why, Star knew why, she knew what she did. And Verdance couldn’t stay here, as bad as she wanted to.
Verdance leaned into the hug, and then pulled back, getting to her feet.
“We’re still enemies.” Verdance said, keeping her voice stony. “You made that clear tonight.”
“But I’m no coward. If I kill you, you die like a warrior.”
That’s right, Verdance could put it off. She could come back another day, and that time she would follow through.
She… still was a gladiator.
She was still worth somthing
She stands up too, brushing herself off. Makes sense. Star didn't apologize and now Verdance is leaving.
"Thank you Verdance. I'd be happy to fight another time. That- was horrid."
Next time she'll win. Without help.