Welcome To My Dark And Twisted Garbage Can @john-geese - Tumblr Blog

mockva

Man notices an Eagle eyeing the fish he just caught

mexicain-sans-frontiers-v2

the-davest-of-uncles

*gets back to the nest* baby you are NEVER gonna believe how i got this fish

hotvampireadjacent

https://twitter.com/birdtickler/status/1552657242909904897?s=21&t=q4JEDIALmV-cAjcoEOypdw

littlemisspipebomb

ok so I looked it up, and it turns out they made a track out of PVC pipes, down a hill. The owner didn't realise PVC expanded in the heat, so on a turn the track just fell apart and the dude inside went over a fucking free way and into a swamp.

aspiringwarriorlibrarian

The funniest part is that the inspector was watching the whole time, and once the ball stopped he left without saying anything. Park management just shut it down then and there.

baronfulmen

"The ball cleared a small hill, briefly going airborne, then zipped right across Route 94, the two-lane road splitting the park. Cars honked and slammed on their brakes. If there had been opposing traffic, Frank would have become part of a real-life game of Pong, volleying from one bumper to another.

Still in pursuit, we followed the ball toward a small lake in Motor World that had been earmarked for a fleet of tiny bumper boats for children. The area wasn’t open yet, but the empty boats were being tested and floated on the surface. The ball soared over the grass and smashed into several of them, scattering the others with rippling waves from the impact, which launched some of the boats several feet in the air.

Charlie and Ken waded into the water looking for the hatch. After some difficulty, they got it open. Charlie pulled Frank out by grabbing him under his armpits like a baby. Frank crawled up the bank, coughing and sputtering. He splayed across the grass as we all stared at the ball, which bobbed in the water like it was attached to a fishing lure.

We did not ask for the inspector’s report, nor did we ever hear of one being filed. Ken Bailey returned to Canada. The snow-makers cleared away the PVC. Told to dispose of the Bailey Ball, they rolled it into the woods, where it remained for many years."

I don't know that this beats the teeth story, but it's pretty great.

lesbianshepard

one of the funnier incidents of me assuming someone knew a meme irl was when a new coworker was talking about some woman who got arrested for tax fraud and I went "God forbid women do anything" and he got scared and thought I was accusing him of being sexist, so he started apologizing and saying how tax fraud isn't even bad, actually.

“Egg [x5]”

*nibbles eggs*

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Garden with Weeping Willow (1888) by Vincent van Gogh

my-dailydreams

treecitysessions

whatthekoi-deactivated20260510

“can’t believe women fought to work!! i don’t wanna work!!” women have Been Working they fought to get Paid you know that right ?

sandmandaddy69

ryebreadgf

1. should we throw a party should we invite bella hadid

2. you people can’t do anything

3. name one hobby you have outside of media consumption

4. I think you guys might be thinking about yourselves too much

ryebreadgf

5. hard to remain patient with friends who focus solely on their own crucifixion. Get off The Cross, ladykins... we could use the wood!

6. name one toxin/hormone and its function

kienava

whyenn-reader

firm believer you can't be a ''good person''. too much niuance to life.

whyenn-reader

you can be good (adjective) but you cannot be good (identity)

whyenn-reader

if you think you are good (identity) you are more likely to cause harm as you don't consider yourself to be capable of it

cocainejuul

I hope everyone grows tired of being cruel to each other soon

beardedmrbean

lucytara

tumblr is genuinely the only social media site with any specific culture because it's the only site where content isn't algorithmic and doesn't vanish into oblivion after like 2 days. we still talk about goncharov. you think twitter is still talking about the ice wars on europa? no. we make internet culture and everybody steals from us, including the awful discourse. this is why i will never leave

doggy-talk-from-dog-land

So I’m moving into a new apartment, and I was told that the room had been damaged, but nothing could have prepared me for the fact that someone had carved Li Shang’s head out of the bathroom door and written “We must defeat the Huns!” on it.

doggy-talk-from-dog-land