A Rat Among Junk.

19, Australian, pan ♎ Sanguine

[vvdotcom]

I changed my mind, TikTok is Vine 2, which is amazing.

[daenerysbeauty]

petition for a live action version of ratatouille where linguine is played by john mulaney and there’s no actual script, they just let him and a rat loose in a kitchen for an hour and a half

[churchrvb02]

I’D WATCH IT

[detrea]

The premise of minimum wage, when it was introduced, was that a single wage earner should be able to own a home and support a family.  That was what it was based on; a full time job, any job, should be able to accomplish this.

The fact people scoff at this idea if presented nowadays, as though the people that ring up your groceries or hand you your burgers don’t deserve the luxury of a home and a family, is disgusting.

[oncelerfucker69-deactivated2019]

Also if a livable wage breaks the system then the system deserves to be broken.

[otter501]

That last bit

[davvic]

My cat Bishop sits outside my door every morning once she hears the alarm clock go off.

[pandaflavouredcookies]

The morning murps

[breaktotheotherside]

Someone has waited HOURS to tell you all the gossip.

[thegravelbro]

this is like the cat version of the professor clip of him going “hello!” every morning the same way

[briannathestrange-deactivated20]

A real, actual, I-am-not-fucking-lying-to-you-this-truly-happened moment from the Christmas special Rapsittie Street Kids: Believe in Santa

[5weekdays]

ricky: great-grandma, you always know just what to say!

ricky’s great-grandma: dohuhohohwhehelghuhohokesynohehCHRISTMAS huahhahohoho

[hiddendriver]

I thought of this while i was driving today and almost drove into my mailbox

[darkmoron]

It’s that time of year again

[loverofpiggies]

merry christmas

[cu-curu-gol-deactivated20181217]

let’s replace tumblr with one big minecraft server

no rules other than what we make in our enclaves (just like microblogging)

we can interact with virtual bodies

more meat

discourse becomes more violent

[cryptomaster-leviathan-deactiva]

• bread

[verifiedblurryface]

Fall Out Boy - 27

[she-ramen]

the she-ra reboot makes this video relevant again which means we are in the best timeline

[she-ramen]

the kids these days dont know this masterpiece…they will learn

[mac-se30-deactivated20190910]

>pay $60 for Fallout 76

>launch game

>download 54GB day one patch

>finally get into game

>no NPCs to interact with

>only lore and story is through long boring audio tapes that can be interrupted but not resumed

>everything is a fetch quest

>constantly disconnected from servers

>constantly encounter hackers

>game encourages me to buy Atoms™ with real money

>drawl through this for 60 hours

>finally get to the end game

>launch nuke

>it explodes

>mushroom cloud

>leave the landscape awash in hellfire

>radioactive ash blocks out the sun

>eventually only a snowy nuclear landscape is left

>black screen

>can’t hear anything

>vision slowly fades in

>….

>“Hey, you, you’re finally awake. You were trying to cross the border, right?”

[butiki]

when tumblrer fucking dies ill catch yall in the uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

[mamoru]

I am an old sage…listen closely to my wisdom before my soul withers away…

[thedoomcard11]

Teach us, o wise one

[mamoru]

you are not an anime character. your actions impact others and do not only exist in theory. nobody is required to stick around for your tragic backstory or to learn the reasons behind your actions. if you treat people like garbage, they are allowed to think of you as a jerk and nothing more. nobody is obligated to analyze you or think twice when you hurt them. similarly, you are not required to stick around to listen to other people’s reasons for treating you like trash. you can call them a jerk, cut them out of your life, and call it a day.

[cheekbonered]

australian gothic

- we all refer to the prime minister by their first name. we know them well, and they know us. all of us.

- there’s a man on the street corner who never leaves. “just waiting for a mate,” he says. you realise he is on every corner, of every street.

- you are swooped by a magpie in the same place, at the same time, every single day. “it’s swooping season!” says your neighbour. it has always been swooping season.

- sometimes you hear a woman whispering late at night - or early in the morning. “rage” she hisses. “rage”.

- the prime minister never seems to last long and often disappears through no discernible democratic process. one of them eats a raw onion in an attempt to assimilate. he is gone by morning, replaced by another.

[eatingcroutons]

- Someone offers you a meat pie. It burns your tongue. You have never asked what kind of meat is in a meat pie. 

- The Prime Minister walks into the ocean and is never seen again. They say he was a traitor, defecting to the enemy, whisked away by submarines. You build a swimming pool in his honour.

- The grass is dead, or the grass is Long. You do not go into the grass when it is Long.

- An old man judges you silently as you buy an avocado. You already knew you would never own a home.

- You offer your friend a drink. They refuse. They say they are Designated. You apologise immediately. You meant no offence, and you would never disrespect the Designated. You have newfound admiration for your friend.

- The ground is lava. Your feet burn and blister as you sprint between the safety of the shadows. Everyone knows you can’t wear shoes.

- There are spiders in your shoes. There are spiders in the shed. There are spiders under the toilet seat. The biggest ones, you allow to stay. They lurk in the highest corners of the ceiling, but you know how fast they can run.

- Someone offers you a jam doughnut. It burns your tongue.

- You check your calendar and your house number three times before you turn on the sprinklers. Your neighbour’s face appears at their window. You wonder if you should check again.

- It is time for the Maccas Run. Nobody knows what time it actually is, but you all sense it is right. The Designated stands up.

- Whoever she is, whenever, wherever, whatever she is, she will always be right.

[fluffmugger]

- It’s bin night. But which bin? The streets lie paralysed, homeowners lurking behind their gates, waiting for someone to make the first move.  - The sun is broiling the land dry.  Half the country is on fire.  You look up at the sky and worry about your flood insurance. 

[ileolai]

- There’s a new prime minister, but it’s the same prime minister. Now he’s gone. There’s a new prime minister. You change your smoke alarm battery.

- You don’t believe the stories about the creatures in the trees, but you take precautions. One day, you see an unwary traveller taking shelter from the blazing sun underneath a jacaranda. When you look back, he’s gone.

- The train is coming in five minutes. The train is coming in four minutes. The train is coming in five minutes. The train is coming in four minutes. The train is coming in five minutes. The train passes you without stopping. The train is coming in five minutes.

- No one knows where They came from, what They want, or why They never age or feel pain. Only the children know. ‘’Fruit salad,’’ they whisper. ‘’Fruit salad.’’

- A giraffe with blank eyes and a strange, fixed smile gives you health advice. You don’t question it.

- ‘’Where the bloody hell are you?’’ The woman asks. ‘’I don’t know,’’ you weep. ‘’I don’t know.’’ She asks again: ‘’Where the bloody hell are you?’’ She never stops asking.

[aradiiaa]

Unpopular opinion: Filler episodes are good because most of them provide a nice break from heavy plot lines and it’s fun to see what the characters are like in different situations and sometimes they’re just plain entertaining

[lostfan10000]

They can also be a way to show unseen aspects of good characters. Any hobbies or close friends they have outside of the main plot.

[incorrectspquotes]

Militsa: We’re not naming our first child Skulduggery.

Skulduggery: You say that now but when you’re high on the pain meds and I’ve arranged for Valkyrie to be in another dimension without a shunter and I’m filling out the birth certificate how are you going to stop me.

Valkyrie: How much of this do you have planned.

[ayeforscotland]

A story in 3 tweets. Good on MDUK💪

[bird--coos-blog]

lol so i was on the Rick and Morty facebook page and they are doing a contest where the winner gets to voice a character on the show, and someone asked if a girl could win and some self-entitled asshat responded but then

[catchymemes]

Do you remember them?

[genjichu]

What about