My Brain Actually Works Unlike You People

Mostly factual responses (aka just shitposts) The name’s brain PLEASE READ MY TAGS I BEG OF YOU, I DONT ALWAYS POST FACTS AND I MAKE UP WORDS THAT SOUND SCIENTIFIC Please DNI if: NSFW, Exclusionist, Pedo/Map, Islamophobe, Anti-Semite

[just-brain-thoughts]

SYSTEM REPORT: brain cell has been missing for 205 day(s)

Overall status: mental breakdown

[funny-thoughts]

Many women don’t seem to understand that men also hold doors open for other men.

[just-broken-thoughts]

I’m very aware, but let’s be honest. Holding the door isn’t really a gender-restricted activity, is it? I do like to hold the door for men whenever I see the opportunity. Just to see how they react. Most of them really don’t pay a lot of attention and just say thank you, but I’ve met a few who were visibly annoyed that 5'3" me does their “strong man’s job” for them. Granted, all of them happened to be at the gym.

[just-binch-thoughts]

Holding doors open is just basic decency and assigning gender to that is weird and kinda gross?

[just-supervillain-thoughts]

I hold the door for men all the time, just about any time I’m the first one in a group to pass through the door, I’ll hold it for the rest of the group, same thing if someone’s closeby and heading to the door, I’ll hold it, the latter situation usually happens at the gym, with big muscly dudes, and the only response I’ve ever gotten is a sincere “oh, thanks.”

[just-binch-thoughts]

The only thing I’ve learned from this is that yall go to the fuckin gym

[just-supervillain-thoughts]

Well, this body isn’t going to build nice muscles on its own, is it? I have to take it to the gym to get it to do that.

[just-brain-thoughts]

What if I have a lil potion of build muscles? 🧪🧪

[just-shower-thoughts]

We live in the MisInformation Age

[just-brain-thoughts]

Actually, it’s called the Data age, excuse you

[just-shower-thoughts]

It’s kind of weird that you never sneeze while you’re asleep

[just-brain-thoughts]

But you do eat spiders…

[just-shower-thoughts]

The world would run a lot smoother if humans weren’t nervous to communicate with each other

[just-brain-thoughts]

Actually, if certain people were nervous to communicate, maybe theyd stopped commenting rude shit on peoples posts

[just-gay-thoughts]

? Babe?

[just-brain-thoughts]

Dw not aimed at anyone and never happened to me

[just-shower-thoughts]

The world would run a lot smoother if humans weren’t nervous to communicate with each other

[just-brain-thoughts]

Actually, if certain people were nervous to communicate, maybe theyd stopped commenting rude shit on peoples posts

[just-shower-thoughts]

If phones could speak we would watch less porn.

[just-brain-thoughts]

Siri very much does speak so…

[just-shower-thoughts]

The smallest coffins are the heaviest coffins

[thepineconelord]

Do they have rocks in them or something?

[just-brain-thoughts]

Heaviest in emotion. Usually a smaller coffin is for a child

[just-shower-thoughts]

Millennials know we’re getting old by how often we need to look something up on UrbanDictionary

[just-brain-thoughts]

Bestie I’m gen z and I have to look up so much still. I even looked up why bestie was getting popular again it’s fine ur not that old

[just-shower-thoughts]

People who talk to themselves would probably be the most interesting people to haunt

[just-brain-thoughts]

Unless they’re just repeating the one line from the song that’s stuck in their head over and over until they drive you crazy

[just-shower-thoughts]

The Power Rangers skipped school to beat up people

[just-brain-thoughts]

Good for them

[bathtub-bastard]

I’m bored. Someone debate me.

[just-gay-thoughts]

Tacos are better than pizza

[crazydoodlez]

...consider nachos

[just-gay-thoughts]

I have considered and come to the conclusion that nachos are simply a form of taco

[thedragonemperess]

Nachos are deconstructed tacos

[just-gay-thoughts]

You, you get it

[cannibalcaprine2]

since you can put pizza ingredients in a taco, pizzas are just flat tacos

[just-gay-thoughts]

Who the fuck is putting pizza sauce in a taco

[greek-mythographer]

americans

[just-gay-thoughts]

No we're not??!!

[greek-mythographer]

thats some mighty fine denial

[just-gay-thoughts]

But I'm not in the nile?

[just-petty-thoughts]

I can change that

[just-royal-thoughts]

Okay but tacos pizza and nachos all taste like shit

[just-petty-thoughts]

You are so wrong

I can let tacos and nachos slide, but i draw the line at pizza

[just-bathbomb-thoughts]

Pizza is so gross

[just-petty-thoughts]

I must disagree

[certifiedgirlthing]

I will not threaten do defenestrate Hawaiian Pizza lovers until I have had pineapples on pizza. Then I can make an informed opinion.

[ghrugirlclub]

PIZZA IS FUCKING DELICIOUS YOU TAKE THAT BACK

[lonleyinmyspacevoid]

all of you are wrong. jello hotdogs are the best.

[ghrugirlclub]

What the fuck did you just say to me?

[lonleyinmyspacevoid]

you fuckin heard me. them blended up, sliced up, hotdog water, jello mixed things. are the best.

[just-brain-thoughts]

D-do you live in the 1950s still or something??!

[bathtub-bastard]

I’m bored. Someone debate me.

[just-gay-thoughts]

Tacos are better than pizza

[crazydoodlez]

...consider nachos

[just-gay-thoughts]

I have considered and come to the conclusion that nachos are simply a form of taco

[thedragonemperess]

Nachos are deconstructed tacos

[just-gay-thoughts]

You, you get it

[cannibalcaprine2]

since you can put pizza ingredients in a taco, pizzas are just flat tacos

[just-gay-thoughts]

Who the fuck is putting pizza sauce in a taco

[greek-mythographer]

americans

[just-gay-thoughts]

No we're not??!!

[greek-mythographer]

thats some mighty fine denial

[just-gay-thoughts]

But I'm not in the nile?

[just-petty-thoughts]

I can change that

[just-royal-thoughts]

Okay but tacos pizza and nachos all taste like shit

[just-petty-thoughts]

You are so wrong

I can let tacos and nachos slide, but i draw the line at pizza

[just-royal-thoughts]

The only valid pizza is Maui zaui and it only has a vague resemblance to regular pizza in flavor

[just-petty-thoughts]

What the fuck is Maui zaui

[just-royal-thoughts]

It’s pineapple, ham, green and red onion, and tomato on a pizza but it’s got Polynesian sauce instead of red sauce

It’s delicious

[just-brain-thoughts]

You put pineapple on pizza? Cancelled.

[valtsv]

so proud of my organs for unionizing. would be great if it wasn't against me but you can't win them all i guess.

[official-kircheis]

what is the brain but the landlord of the organs

[just-shower-thoughts]

At one point in history, Adam has the largest verifiable penis on earth.

[just-binch-thoughts]

Had* also you’re working on the assumption that that guys real.

[bathtub-bastard]

Also, this is incorrect by biblical standards. The animals were all created before Adam, and I hate to break it to you, but having a penis is not human-exclusive.

[just-binch-thoughts]

Ok yeah but I don’t like thinking about whale dick on a regular basis actually

[ultimatebottom69]

Weak

[just-binch-thoughts]

WHY DOES EVERYONE WANT ME TO THINK ABOUT WHALE DICK?

[just-brain-thoughts]

Because. It’s whale dick.

[just-shower-thoughts]

Fries with ketchup is the same basic idea as chips and salsa, but one is vastly superior.

[just-broken-thoughts]

You’re not making clear which one you think is superior. It’s subjective anyway, so I guess it doesn’t matter.

[just-llawer-responses]

YES drench that shit in mayo. If you go to the pool and don’t eat some fries that got absolutely soggy from all the mayo have you really been to the pool?

[just-binch-thoughts]

I like my fries and mayo with unreasonable amounts of raw onion, that way I can terrorize all my friends for days to come

[just-llawer-responses]

ding ding ding you’re right. I LOVE terrorising my expat friends with mayo fries. The onions are a nice addition too, might have to add some satay sauce and maybe some curry sauce too and make it a warzone (get it, patatje oorlog heheh)

[just-brain-thoughts]

No. Pls tell me ur joking

[osha-embroidery-department]

All people from Pennsylvania are fake

[osha-union-representative]

Do you have proof? Or is this another claim to try and say that Pennsylvanian employees are not really employees, and can therefore be used as test subjects? Or was that a previous workplace- Mod OSHA

[osha-embroidery-department]

It simply does not exist

[osha-union-representative]

Pennsylvania? Or people from Pennsylvania? - Mod OSHA

[chaososha]

Dude Pennsylvania exists.

[just-aussie-thoughts]

Not after what I did to it, mate.

[chaososha]

(I'm sorry this can be read as a reference to the plane that crashed down in a Pennsylvania feild on 9/11 that was heading for a government building so are you referencing that?)

[just-aussie-thoughts]

(No no, sorry. I apologise if it seemed that way and I had completely forgotten about that. I apologise and if you wish for me to delete it, please notify me)

[chaososha]

Nah dude it's fine just the first thing that came to mind with bad things happening in Pennsylvania-

[osha-embroidery-department]

PENNSYLVANIA DOESNT EXIST

[chaososha]

THE FUCK IS THIS THEN?

[osha-embroidery-department]

THATS ENGLAND

[chaososha]

WHY IS THE FONT DIFFERENT THEN

[osha-embroidery-department]

BECAUE ENGLAND WANTS TO BE SPECIAL

[chaososha]

GEE NOW I KNOW WHY THERE WAS A REVOLUTION AGAINST IT.

STFU AND ADMIT THAT THAT'S PENNSYLVANIA!

[just-brain-thoughts]

As the resident brain cell holder, no that’s England. Pennsylvania was made up for homestuck