Hammish

Carpe Noctem, Seize the night! A place for art, writing, and random things I enjoy.

[justahammishontheweb]

No context, except that this was made with a good friend of mine.

[everythingfox]

“Tiny round rain frog wakes up, yawns, rubs his eyes, then squeezes himself into his tiny hole”

(via)

[samantha-evergreen]

THIS!!

post by @bauliy

[miiriya]

[shareddreamingexperiment]

yea bud! i was on the grind nonstop for a few months until my body said haha watch THIS! and took me out of work for 3 weeks

[rhube]

Sometimes, it will take the rest of your life.

I can’t stress this enough. I wish I could get through to everyone I know. If you try to organise and be productive with every minute of your day, eventually, your body will pull the rug out from under you in a dramatic fashion, and you may end up being able to do very little at all, in a world that has no sympathy for people who need to rest.

So rest now. And work on making sure the people around you know it’s OK to rest.

And don’t feel guilty for resting. Practice telling yourself that rest - quality rest, where you’re not stressing about something you feel you ought to be doing - is actually a productive thing to do for your body.

You are an animal. You need to respect that animal’s needs. That includes laying about doing nothing as much as it does enrichment and running about.

Even your fucking computer gets overheated and slow if you don’t allow it to shut down and update sometimes (which is actually a lot of what sleep does for humans, btw). You eve notice how sometimes your browser just crashes sometimes because you have too many tabs open, or one of the tabs is causing the whole machine to run slowly?

So don’t tell yourself you want to work like a machine because guess what? Machines fucking fall over all the time if you overload them, try to do too many things at once, or don’t let them rest.

Rest knits up the ravelled edge of care.

[morphegus]

real talk something i have to keep learning and i think a lot of you guys are like me: your friends shouldnt be intimidating. if you see all of your friends chillin in a discord vc, dont just sit there and think damn they are all hanging out without me theyre playing games without me they dont want to talk to me. just join the vc homie. if they didnt want you to talk to them they would privatly call. if u wanna play a gane and nobody has asked u to play a game that just means u can be the one to ask to play a game. a majority of the time ur friends are not sitting there thinking about how much they dont want to hang out with you

[morphegus]

also its ok to be the one to initiate all conversations. i love talking to my friends but its not on my mind 24 hours a day. if someone sends me a message im like oh yeah my cool friend who i like messaged me we get 2 talk now

[gonzoguy]

the day that tumblr learns that it isn’t progressive whatsoever to shame people for being attracted to men is the day the world heals. there’s nothing progressive about shaming gay and bisexual men using homophobic tactics and spreading biphobia toward bisexual women.

[gonzoguy]

you know what? shaming straight women for liking men isn’t cute either. i genuinely hope that every straight girl has a fulfilling and happy relationship. when you put the blame on women for even dating “grrr evil men” in the first place you ignore the amount of abuse that women face in relationships and you excuse the men who are misogynistic and pieces of shit by emphasizing the idea that it’s normal for men to treat women like garbage.

[incel-moved-deactivated20210803]

[everythingfox]

Study buddies

(via)

[lilmamabeyellin]

[itscoldinwonderland]

Different people respond better to different types of therapy, and most therapist will do multiple types of therapy with their patients.

CBT - Most common type of therapy because it works well for all mental health problems.

ACT - Especially helpful for treating anxiety disorders, depressive disorders, OCD, psychosis and substance abuse.

DBT - Specifically created for BPD. This type of therapy works really well for personality disorders, PTSD, eating disorders, substance abuse and impulsive control disorders.

Interpersonal therapy - Created to treat major depressive disorder but is now also used for other depressive and mood disorders.

There are lots of other types of therapy too (:

[tiiiiiired]

Gonna add my two cents as a research psychologist:

CBT does NOT work well if the individual has a history of being emotionally manipulated or gaslit, nor does it work well when the individual is working through traumas that have been used against them or disbelieved. CBT can feel like gaslighting, toxic positivity, denial of the seriousness of a situation, or emotional manipulation if not done very carefully. As such, it might be best to avoid it and find something else if you have a history of problems with the aforementioned experiences.

ACT also works REALLY WELL for individuals coping with sudden and “devastating” changes! It’s often adapted for use by disability specific clinics to help newly diagnosed patients learn to cope with the limitations on their environments. People with disabilities (PWDs) tend to feel pressured to not express their disability related distress around non-PWDs and, as such, tend to see those feelings as shameful. There’s a lot of “I should be more grateful” or “it’s not as bad as it could be” feelings around disability as a result of this pressure and ACT is great for undoing them!

DBT is generally amazing for stress disorders and preventing stress disorder symptomatology in at risk populations. It teaches you stress tolerance skills and how best to avoid or diminish conflicts, allowing you to avoid the sorts of environmental triggers that commonly worsen stress disorder symptoms.

Interpersonal therapy is also great for neurodivergent folks, victims of childhood emotional abuse, and children of parents with untreated/unmanaged psychiatric disorders. Essentially, if you grew up with difficulty interacting effectively with and relating to others, interpersonal therapy can help you understand why and change those interactions in the future. Healthier relationships and social interactions are a great way to break the cycle of abuse for those of us raised by parents who were emotionally abusive and/or had untreated mental illnesses.

Since no one has mentioned it on this post, I’d like to add that most therapists these days practice a sort of integrative therapy. They’ll take what they find most effective from each type of therapy for each individual problem, and piece together something a little more tailor made for their patients. This is part of why seeing an actual therapist is so important. Not every aspect of the aforementioned therapies will be relevant to every problem. Some aspects may even be harmful to handling some problems. The therapist is trained to pick out these things and adjust accordingly, unlike the average self help book or online resource. But knowing the types of therapies available and what you want to get from therapy is an immense part of finding a therapist that will suit your needs, so please research things carefully and think over what you need before selecting one!

Go to therapy, y'all!

[antique-scarecrow]

Reminder that you can and should shop around for a therapist. Treat your first session as a job interview, where you are the one hiring. Ask questions about what therapy techniques they use, what techniques are likely to work for your specific issues, and if they have experience treating patients with your diagnoses. Above all, don’t settle for a therapist who doesn’t feel like a good fit. Many therapists don’t charge for the first session specifically so patients can treat it as a practice/interview session.

There are different types of therapy & therapists, so please look around until you find what works for you.

[three--rings]

Yes, most therapists won’t pin themselves down to one type of therapy and if you ask if they practice it, they will just say they practice a “blend” of styles.  This may be an issue if you are looking for something specific. 

There a WIDE range of different types of degrees and certifications someone who practices therapy can have and they are not created equal.  Some are more specialized, like an educational therapist, or more prestigious like any kind of Clinical Psychologist. 

The easiest to acquire and therefore most common is probably Marriage and Family therapists, who are supposed to mostly focus on interpersonal problems and not serious mental health issues.  That doesn’t stop a lot of people with this degree from trying, however.  The programs can also focus a lot on religious ideals and traditional family values, so that’s something to watch out for.  (When I was working in the field, my coworkers mostly went through MFT programs and told me I needed to go do it because “the program is SO EASY, you’d breeze through it” and I was like…why would I want that?)

So, if I were you, I’d look up not only someone’s license type, but where they went to school and what program they graduated from.  The more “hard science” the program and school, the better the program, usually.  (Which doesn’t mean that more expensive schools are better, the best programs in the country are at public universities, but your more rural, small, niche schools are going to be a lot weaker.  You know when there are only like three professors and they are all both counselors and ministers…well…you see what I’m saying…)

[sighdumbb]

[shavingryansprivates-deactivate]

holy shit

[josukekun-deactivated20130906]

JESUS

[tramampoline]

omg

[itsvondell-deactivated20180104]

wh

[transhumanisticpanspermia]

it’s back

[arcticsirius]

wat

[mage-of-time]

I have yet to witness something as fucked up as this

[ttrust-no-one]

WHAT THE FUCK DID I JUST READ

[runawayalters]

wow

[actualmonster]

Holy shit

[swagakuya-brogami-deactivated20]

This is an ace attorney trial

[overtheblueridgemountains]

“Now comes the exquisite twist”

[tiktoks-for-dead-pope]

[sinothetimes]

I think what really makes this is that his American accent is perfect, he clearly has no issues with English, it’s just that the way we spell words is complete bullshit.

[houselannisters]

never forget that hugh dancy (star of the show hannibal) became infamous among fans for constantly saying that hannibal and will were “platonic” and “non romantic” (implying he was freaked out by it) only for  mads mikklesen (aka hannibal) to go to a con (where hugh was NOT present) and happily expose to fans that hugh had been sending HIM erotic fan fiction for years and the one thing mads had taken away from it was that he (hannibal) was “quite good”

i think about this every. day.

[wern]

i think covid-19 is probably triggering full-blown agoraphobia and panic disorder in some people who were already susceptible to it (like people with mood and anxiety disorders). if you feel scared of leaving the house due to fear of becoming overwhelmed/having an panic attack in public, that's a problem that tends to get worse. i highly encourage you to look into therapy. you deserve to feel like you can go outside

[wern]

all mood and anxiety disorders are based on this pattern: you don't do something because you believe it gives you symptoms you can't handle, but not doing that thing is actually making your symptoms worse. feedback loop. so because during covid going outside involves more anxiety than usual, people who feel overwhelmed by anxiety may stop going outside at all, and this will make going outside seem even more impossible and reinforce their beliefs

if you feel like this, try to make a plan for getting back outside little by little. write it down. use "training wheels" at the start, like only going out to your backyard, or going out with a parent or pet. use the usual tips for calming anxiety. see a therapist if you at all can

[three--rings]

Very true. Staying home all the time due to my physical disability has led to a reemergence of some anxiety problems I'd previously dealt with. Gradual exposure is key, and therapy is good at helping.

[megapope-deactivated20220531]

next fucking level

[sugarplumfuckwit]

I’m starting to think furries are the fastest growing sector of the American economy

[thetrashiestoftrash]

From his Twitter:

[brain-confetti]

All I wanted was cool robots. But this is the future we got instead.

[megapope-deactivated20220531]

this man is leveraging his presence in a niche community to advertise his tax services and you're sat here with your thumb up your ass thinking this precludes advanced robotics somehow. we should all someday be so lucky as Tax Badger

[copperbadge]

“My doors are only closed to wall street” Tax Badger just went from cool dude to legend.   

[Description: Top image, a profile page for Tax Badger, a self-described “Tax business for furries!” with a drawing of a badger dressed in a suit and looking very professional. Second image, from his twitter, someone in DMs asking “I know you do taxes for furries but do you do taxes for non-furry, furry-friendly NSFW content creators?” Tax Badger replies “Of course! Furries are my target client, but my doors are only closed to wall street.”]

[elissespieces]

I hope people realize how awesome this is.

NSFW artists are both highly in demand and highly ostracized, sometimes by the very same people who patron their work. They’ll have a few who genuinely support them up, but if hard issues hit, like say, an audit (TAXES), can you imagine a smut or hentai artist taking all of their paperwork and numbers to the local H&R? Sitting down and explaining their business expenses- some of which might include porn conventions, or printing and distributing 18+ adult content on their own dime. That sounds doable, right?

The JUDGEMENT ALONE would be exhausting, constantly defending yourself and your work when it’s actually in high demand, and that’s assuming you can even find someone willing to help. Any bullshit excuse could send you out the door.

Do not, EVER, turn your nose up at a professional offering their services to a niche group of people. Because one day, you may find yourself in a niche, suddenly in need of a pro hookup- for something that the average career person can get out of a quick google search (I totally had to delete the words ‘phone book’), but find nothing but slim pickings for your market.

[wufflesvetinari]

please read the description for awesomedice.com’s 1-sided die

[pinejaysong]

you know what’s even better than a guilty pleasure?

a smug indulgence. tell yourself, “i’m gonna do this thing because i like it, and there’s nothing you can do to make me feel bad about it!” eat that cake! read that romance novel! be free!!!

[sweaterkittensahoy]

I remember I was in high school when it struck me that “guilty pleasure” was not a term ANY GUY EVER USED EVER. I never heard dudes EVER excuse things they liked with, “Oh, but it’s a guilty pleasure, so you know (nervous laugh).” Like, it hit me HARD. Men don’t have to justify liking dumb shit. They’re allowed to like dumb shit without question. AND SO ARE YOU. “guilty pleasure” is a way to shame women for enjoying things that aren’t “intellectual” or “mature” enough, and FUCK THAT. Love what you love and just LOVE IT. And if anyone says, “Isn’t that sort of a guilty pleasure?” You stare ‘em down and reply, “No, I just like it.” And if they question you? Fucking ruin them by refusing to justify. “But why?” “Because I like it.” “But, like, WHY?” “Because I like it.” “Because I like it,” is 100% a reason to enjoy something. You like it. Enjoy it. Fuck guilty pleasures.

[rneliflua]

there’s this specific brand of lazy media criticism seen on tumblr and twitter that I like to call “checklist criticism”. it is called like this because it consists on checking for the presence of superficial signifiers of a Bad Trope™ (as if going through a static checklist) in a given piece of media and declaring said piece of media to be, therefore, bad, without taking into account factors such as context, nuances, the handling, the framing, and, most importantly, what makes this bad trope bad in first place, and if the harm it usually causes is still being perpetrated in this particularly story given the aforementioned contextual variables.

an example of checklist criticism that happens a lot is the common “[x] this tv show has a female character [x] who dies before the show is over, therefore = Woman In The Refrigerator™, show bad!” Okay but, how did she died? What were the circumstances around her death? What purpose did it serve in the larger story? Did she die just to advance someone else’s story or she died fulfilling her own arc? Did she had any agency in the way she went or was she a passive victim of circumstance? Was her death dignified or unnecessarily violent? Are there any other important female characters that make it to the end? The Woman In The Refrigerator™ trope is not bad because women dying in fiction is inherently bad – if no female character were ever allowed to die, even in war or crime or post-apocalypt fiction, there’d be very low stakes for female characters, and low stakes mean very little reason to care about them. The WITR trope is bad because it’s about treating female characters as more expendable than male ones, banalizing violence against women in fiction, and cutting short female representation from pieces of fiction – which, most of the time, is already low. A female character whose death has an actual point in her own storyline, who’s afforded the same weight and dignity as male character’s deaths, and in a story where there’s no shortage of other female characters that survive the end of the story, is not a Fridged Woman, she’s just a female character who dies.

Another example – and here I’m taking an example from my own identity, so I don’t get accused of stepping on anyone’s feet – would be something like “this book has a [x] latina character, she’s [x] loud and spontaneous, she likes to [x] flirt and sleep around. Spicy Latina™! Book racist!” Okay, is she a caricature of a loud and spontaneous latina or is she a fully realized human being with a fully rounded personality, including dreams and wishes and opinions and vulnerabilities and agency, who just happens to be spontaneous, like so many people across multiple ethnicities happen to be? Is being flirty and spontaneous her only character traits or does she have more (that may go against other stereotypes about latinas)? Is her flirtness and sexuality framed in a fetishistic way that favors a (white) male gaze or it is framed in a nuanced way that prioritizes her pov and her agency and her pleasure and her happiness? Did the author really give her those traits because they’re a lazy fuck that couldn’t think of other traits to give his latina character other than spontaneous and flirty or do those characters traits have an actual point in the context of this particular story? Again: keep in mind why bad tropes are bad in first place.

We live in a time where reductive criticisms are an easy source of clout over actually thoughtful and deep analysis that don’t easily lend themselves to the type of short and snappy hot takes for twitok format and I’m exhausted.                      

[rneliflua]

Like, this lack of understanding of what makes certain bad tropes bad is how we ended up with a plethora of male writers patting themselves in the back for creating a ~deconstruction of the Manic Pixie Dream Girl trope~ by writing stories where the male protagonist has to learn that the girl they assigned as their personal MPDG is not interested in fixing him, while still making it all about their male protagonists POV and their story and their arc. The MPDG is not bad because women being quirky is bad or because people helping their partners grow is bad. The MPDG is bad because it’s about women being narrative tools with no inner life helping the growth of the male protagonist, and if you write a story where she still has no personhood and is still pretty much defined by your male protag’s view of her you’re not changing anything just because the dude has to learn by the end that his view of her was wrong and she never wanted to save him. you still wrote a story about a flat female character that helps the pov male protag learn a lesson, only this time it was a different lesson, you just changed the window dressing.