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April 24th, 2019 - Second-to-last Preview

Ah yes, the four emotions. Happiness, sadness, anger, and murder

(gdrive)

[katanadoshi]

Big fucking mood right here

[reddit-tales]

Workers, when have you said “fuck this, I quit”?

I used to work at McDonalds (I know). Opening usually involved me at the front counter with a headset on so I could do drive-through orders and handle making coffee / putting orders together / taking money at the front from the little old people that came in at the crack of dawn every morning. We would also have a manager who was there to be important and one person in the kitchen. We’re a small rural town so usually this is fine but we were on kind of a major highway so sometimes it would get busy out of nowhere.

Depending on the manager the amount of help we had would vary wildly. One morning we got super busy and I started cracking under the pressure. I’m a fantastic multi-tasker but my drive-through line was backing up since I was trying to juggle them and all the walk-in folks from my front registers and when it gets packed…well, it’s fun. I glance around trying to find my manager for help. I see him on one of our cameras – he’s outside smoking a cigarette around the side of the building. Mind you, this is like his third trip out to smoke this morning. I’m absolutely dying trying to get caught up. Customers are being passive aggressive saying they will come behind the counter and get their own coffee and stuff. I have people yelling at me in my headset from the drive through. I end up having to remove the headset just to try to get the frontline sorted. I start making progress with the front but I basically had to sacrifice the drive-through customers for two minutes.

Apparently the cars outside start yelling at my manager and interrupt his smoke break so he comes in, sees me with my headset off and goes berserk. He’s like “WHOS TAKING THE DRIVE-THRU ORDERS?” I’m in the middle of trying to get a fresh pot of coffee going so I sort of auto-respond “No one. Hang on.” as I continue to dash around behind our counter to grab a fruit & yogurt parfait for an order. He basically gets in my way and starts giving me shit. Loudly, talking to me like I’m a dog. I point to the camera and yell, loudly enough to disrupt the entire inside of the restaurant. “I’m these two registers, first window, second window, and I’m bagging. I’m like FOUR PEOPLE and you’re out behind the building not doing SHIT!”

His eyes go wide. I can tell he knows I’m holding on by my last thread. He’s sighs. And he’s like “You’re in a ton of trouble but we can talk about this later.” No. Fuck him. I’m done. I’m all riled up from random customers yelling at me. I toss him the headset. “You want to give me shit for not being able to run like four stations with no support? Run five. I’ll watch.” I remove my name badge.

He went to say something to me. I turn away, facing the one girl working in the kitchen who is watching this all play out. I remember telling her “I’m so sorry.” and then I dropped my name badge, toss my hat on the counter, grab a water cup, put on (and zip) my jacket so my uniform is covered up. I go to the drink fountain, fill my water cup, and then I go sit on the far side of the seating area and watch him go down in flames. He ends up ALSO taking off the headset and picking up the phone so he can spam call the whole workforce one by one trying to call for help. It’s like 5AM so no one is going to accept a call from their work number. About ten minutes into his struggle he ends up very loudly pleading with me to come back from behind the counter. I can’t even see him on the other side of the sea of people swarming the counter at this point.

I call back “I need a smoke first!” and I go outside.

I don’t smoke. I’ve never smoked. I drive home.

He ended up losing his job.

[tokillapromqueen-deactivated201]

[stinson-png-deactivated20210103]

This was funnier in my head. 

[demilypyro]

Where’s that song that’s like “It’s the best day ever cause I’m a stupid fucking cat and I don’t know I’m gonna die”

[warpedlamp]

[demilypyro]

👌

[outlandishreads-deleted-deactiv]

im a simple girl.. i see book, i buy book, i let book sit on my shelf for months unread

[rafawriter]

[chadzia-deactivated20180101]

the fun part is trying to figure out what everyone in the notes’ real names are

[m0ssagate-deactivated20220119]

Abby :/

[besnurched]

Amy. Fuck having a short name

[incremental-revolution]

aein. So, it’s how people pronounce it all the time anyway.

[systlin]

Aeeklnnt   

how the hell do I even say that

[thebibliosphere]

Joy. That’s it, that’s my fantasy protagonist name. @quinfirefrorefiddle was right all along.

[katanadoshi]

Personal trainer: What fitness goals are you hoping to accomplish?

Me: Okay so there's this band with Space Canadians fronted by a sort of yellow spandex traffic cone man and he likes to do these high kicks... I want to high kick like the cone man

[flameroyalty97-deactivated20210]

Um yes the TWRP and Protomen collaboration, Phantom Racer, has cured my depression, cleared my skin, watered my crops, helped me ascend beyond this reality, and taught me the ability to travel through time.

[katanadoshi]

The band from the Future of Canada in the 80′s of Space has truly blessed us.

[tastefullyoffensive]

(photos by Bill Watterson and an octopus)

[transparasite-deactivated201806]

I think this is the best scientist photograph I have ever seen.

[shellysbees-blog]

But people didn’t believe him on reddit. So Watterson made the photo sequence into a gif.

[katanadoshi]

I know I say this a lot but THIS IS MY FAVORITE THING.

[hawkgirls-deactivated20260403]

“Batman has more than one son,“ I say into the mic.

The crowd boos. I begin to walk off in shame, when a voice speaks and commands silence from the room.

“She’s right,” I hear. I look around for the owner of the voice. There in the fifth row, he stands: Bruce Wayne himself.

[slightlyburntcinnamonroll]

“What does he know about Batman” the crowd replies and resumes booing. Bruce Wayne discreetly leaves the room. In an unrelated turn of events, a voice speaks from above. “She’s right,” I hear. There crashing through the skylight: Batman.

[bonkalore]

#i can’t believe bruce wayne missed his chance to meet batman

[illinicoise]

“But if you forget to reblog Madame Zeroni, you and your family will be cursed for always and eternity.”

[spn-fandom-breathing-heavily]

not even risking that shit

[catnippackets]

can there be a thing called self insert day where everybody just draws themselves hanging out with their fave fictional characters and we all have a collective party so nobody feels self-conscious about posting self insert fanart online

[catnippackets]

omg this is gaining rapid notes and everybody seems so pumped for this. Can I pick a day and we actually do this?? um. um. How about June 27&28? Self insert weekend!!! that gives ppl three weeks to prepare!! (tag things as #self insert weekend if you actually do it cuz I wanna see your guys’ drawings hehe)

[eshbaal]

I’m not crying, you’re crying.

(art by @mabychan !)

[katanadoshi]

[smgoetter]

“Lady Tilda and the Dragon”

Or “Mom Knight” which is what I kept calling it for most of the time I worked on this. This was my story for Valor, a fairy tale anthology I was in last year! It’s a really great book, and I’m so glad I got to be a part of it. You can purchase a copy here.

[knit-my-feelings]

😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

[staff]

🚨This is a Red Alert for net neutrality 🚨

Last December, the FCC voted to to kill net neutrality. If we do not take action, this will kill the free and open internet as we know it. The internet needs you—all of you—to make sure your voices are heard NOW.

We need all hands on deck for this one. It may be our last chance. If you’re feeling under-informed and overwhelmed about why net neutrality is so incredibly important, we have this handy guide just for you.

Here’s what you can do to save the internet:

In mid-May, the Senate will vote on a resolution to overrule the FCC using the Congressional Review Act (CRA). We only need one more vote in the Senate to win. Write or call your Senators or Representatives. You can also text BATTLE to 384-387 to get more information on how to write to your reps. You can do this, Tumblr.

Join us and dozens of your other favorite companies like Etsy, Vimeo, Reddit, and GitHub to raise awareness with the Red Alert campaign being run by Battle for the Net. Just add this small widget to your Tumblr to let your followers know how they can contact their reps. It’s as easy as copying and pasting the small line of code right into the customize theme page on the web.

This is important. This matters. It’s up to you to help. 

[solarpunk-aesthetic]

This adorable little robot is designed to make sure its photosynthesising passenger is well taken care of. It moves towards brighter light if it needs, or hides in the shade to keep cool. When in the light, it rotates to make sure the plant gets plenty of light. It even likes to play with humans.

Oh, and apparently, it gets antsy when it’s thirsty.

The robot is actually an art project called “Sharing Human Technology with Plants” by a roboticist named Sun Tianqi. It’s made from a modified version of a Vincross HEXA robot, and in his own words, it’s purpose is “to explore the relationship between living beings and robots.”

I don’t care if it’s silly. I want one.

[iamanemotionaltimebomb]

um this is the cutest thing in the world and i want 10

[retro-minty]

THIS IS SO PRECIOUS I COULD CRY

[youtreau]

Joseph’s Machines