John F. Kennedy

(NO LONGER SECRETLY) in love with @nixon-official. Happily engaged!!!!!

[kennedy-official]

can't believe that a Kennedy is promoting saturated fats. the only type of meat I'm gonna consume daily is Nixon's.

[kennedy-official]

bro i miss the days where i had the motivation to make funny content every day. i need a nap and a 5 hour energy. where is my husband.

[kennedy-official]

i require ambien

[kennedy-official]

we should put hot sauce on the white house

[kennedy-official]

Dude when's your wedding

that's classified

[kennedy-official]

so.

It's been a minute.

[cheshirecatlair]

Behold!

a beautiful artistic portrayal of President Richard Nixon @nixon-official and F.B.I. director J. Edgar Hoover @hoover-fbi french-kissing each other! drawn by the very talented @mosslingg

[hoover-fbi]

....k.

[john-f-kennedyfr]

oh this is so cute!

[kennedy-official]

I don't know how I feel about seeing this but you go Nixon baby!

[kennedy-official]

How I have tabled the turns.

[nixon-official]

hello there, this is your yearly Christmas Cheer check-up

📝so are you going to be standing underneath the mistletoe waiting for anyone, or are you going to be watching the mistletoe to see who goes underneath it without knowing?

I have been standing under my mistletoe hoping, praying that my fiancé John F. Kennedy will walk through the door, sweep me off my feet, and kiss me since November 27th. He always keeps himself so busy. 😢

[kennedy-official]

😘

[nixon-official]

Rumors of my genitalia have been greatly exaggerated.

[kennedy-official]

I know, I know. Everyone's saying he's got a micro. Take the upper bound for the definition of a micro, times 3.5

slightly more accurate

[kennedy-official]

oh. maybe we are cooked.

[truly-terrible-advice]

Cook them back.

[kennedy-official]

Well, Richie, get the blowtorch.

[kennedy-official]

oh. maybe we are cooked.

[nowheresamsaucex]

-one bread roll to the other bread roll in the oven

[kennedy-official]

cronchy

[kennedy-official]

500 cigarettes

-🧪💉

*smokes them all in 2.47 seconds*

[wheezing] yeah, and?

[kennedy-official]

oh. maybe we are cooked.

[kennedy-official]

https://archiveofourown.org/works/74495756?fbclid=PARlRTSAOMDrtleHRuA2FlbQIxMABzcnRjBmFwcF9pZA8xMjQwMjQ1NzQyODc0MTQAAadFuZ0elayP-vQDxfpTrDlObdsqu03HHKW0O0FCREXZ1vAJK-NM1tMNkt5KOA_aem_mR4Hz6Y3OpecO_TYFqplRA

here you go mr kennedy

you saw it here first, y'all

[kennedy-official]

my final english assignment ever may be a fanfiction about you and nixon

you are beloved

[ultimatelyangel]

john f. kennedy we need you

[nixon-official]

John F. Kennedy

I need you! 🥺🥺🥺

[dubya-official]

I knew you were a homosexual..

[nixon-official]

I'm only 50% homosexual.

I'm bisexual.

[kennedy-official]

I'm 50% bisexual too!

the gay half.

[kennedy-official]

When's the marriage?

uh. yeah.