When It Mattered || Jjongwoo
minwoo-ia:
Prince would be fine, Minwoo mused to himself, looking at the water in his glass as he tilted it a little from one side to the other. He listened to Jonghyun talk but did not look at him, it hurt too much. Everything just hurt so much and it happened so much. At the same time, nothing happened at all. Destiny was just a lousy excuse for things to happen, Minwoo thought in a scowl as he sipped from the water and finally looked at Jonghyun who was looking away. “Their bond is not just a bond it is everything, it is family. If you can’t rely on…” he paused. Right. Jonghyun and the subject of family was perhaps not the best angle to continue this conversation. “nevermind.” He muttered, putting the glass down before he would break it.
“Since you returned, have you even been in love with me?” He asked, honestly curious now even if the truth would hurt probably. “Like, I know that you loved me but have you been in love with me?” Was that even possible anymore with the way Jonghyun had been since he returned? Had they not fallen from one dramatic episode into another? They never really had time to breathe.
“I don’t know if it is even worth it, everyone just keeps dying or becoming a God or going back home to go into an arranged marriage…” Minwoo shrugged “Maybe we are just supposed to be demons and cause havoc and be fine with that, what is love when you can’t even properly fall in love.” He sighed and got up. “What are you even going to do to convince me?” Minwoo said, doubt in his eyes, he was close to give up. “Why do you even want to? What do you even want?”
Have you even been in love with me? What do you even want?
Somehow Minwoo's questions managed to be the simplest and hardest to answer at the same time. And Jonghyun's long, long silence with eyes staring off into nothing probably said more than any words could have. He was still re-learning what it meant to be in love; to feel butterflies instead of just the fierce fire in his stomach that would protect Minwoo from the entire world if necessary. "If I knew what I'm going to do, I would have already convinced you and we wouldn't be having this conversation," the demon replied with a wry, humorless twitch of his lips before dragging both of his hands across his face; a deep, deep sigh escaping his chest. Of course his usual way with words became sluggish and clumsy when everything he loved and cared about was on the line.
"I-- I want to fall in love with you again. Having that taken from me was never your fault. I want us to have a safe space in which we can be together without worrying that everything will be taken from us again, I want--" Breaking off, his voice became more quiet. "I want to kill my father. I want to finally be free of him so that I can allow myself to fall in love with you again. I want us to have a future. Because despite everything, I look at you and I still see everything I hold dear in this world. When we first met you made me realize that creatures like us can be more than the darkness and the chaos within them -- and now I want to make you remember it, too."
He wasn't pleading, not really. Instead Jonghyun simply let truth flow from his lips, truth that Minwoo could either reject or accept but he wasn't going to force him; not this time. Not ever again.
















