man i wish top had never happened
this is why i have been so vocal about tops treatment of domestic violence and partner abuse being fucking atrocious. abuse and dv are sensitive subjects that needs to be handled properly and respectfully, or this is what happens.
they way people went from seeing ballas as a horrible, evil and selfish man to this whole 'uwu the mean woman hurt him because she loved her children more than him' bullshit drives me up the fucking wall.
like do people genuinely not understand why it is so upsetting for survivors of dv and ipv to constantly have people go "uhmmmm actually he did love her, just in his own way!!!!" about the man who abused and murdered her, as well as overall framing their entire relationship as being "normal" just because ballas was orokin??? like it might have been "normal" amongst the orokin social class, the way it's been "normal" for every ruling class to abuse and exploit people they have power over.
the orokin were evil because they were human. ballas was evil because he was human. the entire point of the orokin was that while they saw themselves as living gods, at the end of the day they were still human and that was their downfall.
and even if margulis' and ballas' relationship hadn't been abusive, she was an archimedian and he was not only orokin, but also an executor. their relationship had an insane power imbalance. even roathe mentions how ballas "could have had his way with her" due to their stations, and the only reason ballas deciding not to rape a woman he wanted is framed as him being in love with her, is because its roathe re-telling that story - roathe who himself was victimized by an executor. which is why he also romanticizes ballas' and margulis' relationship, because to him it probably did look like love. doesn't mean it was - he was an outside observer. like people keep praising him for being an unreliable narrator, even the writers has stated he is one, and yet people keep taking everything he says at face value.
pregnancy is one of the highest risk factors for the increase in violence against a woman in an abusive relationship. the most dangerous time for a woman in an abusive relationship is when she's trying to leave, because that's when he's most likely to kill her. it is not love that an abuser feels towards their victim, but ownership and entitlement.
ballas arranged margulis' execution because she defied him and because she chose her children over him.
i don't care whether it was intentional or not that both margulis and the lotus mirrors these two statistics in their stories. these are real things that happens to real women, and the way DE has treated these subjects in top has been irresponsible and thoughtless. and the way the fandom has been behaving as well is just as inconsiderate.
i don't care that we're talking about fictional characters, the arguments and the narratives regarding dv and ipv that are currently circulating in both the source material and the fandom are real arguments and real narratives that harms real people. do better.