too gay to function

kirby, lesbean, 22, chicago, aspiring comedian and meme lover

[snowflakeeel]

[croaksac]

[parksrway]

nobody gets me like they get me

[gmbencompetence]

We need to have a nomination for “Stupidest thing Tumblr.com has ever believed” and just move into an official Top 10 List.

For my nominations, I’m putting up:

If you eat a chocolate bar a very specific way, you will break physics and get infinite chocolate.

or

It is impossible that you spelled “Berenstain Bears” wrong and is, instead, more likely that the universe fractured into separate, overlapping realities in the last 20 years.

I can’t decide which is more beautiful. It’s why we need a vote.

[jupiterjunebug]

this is a picture of the human brain at the moment of death. tragic and beautiful

[gmbencompetence]

Fuck. That is a damn good nomination.

[thisisdefinitelyacreativename]

if you close your eyes when the train hits your brain will assume you are dead. Some find this comforting.

[gmbencompetence]

We’re getting into the good ones now. This is some classic Tumblr.

[turtle-powered]

Two old favourites:

“Bitch, That’s the Tubby Custard Machine” (http://imgur.com/gallery/IObQF)

and the horse dildo that was passed off as someone’s arm. (http://abakkus.tumblr.com/post/48958415162)

[gmbencompetence]

This is rapidly becoming a master post of ignorances and I could not possibly be happier.

[analienorsutin]

Rare blue watermelon

[sickofimmortality]

That disease where you get purple eyes, no period, and no body hair

[akiraita]

How have we gone this far without anyone mentioning the bird in the chocolate fountain

[unicornfan]

soap makes water molecules smaller

[elphabaoftheopera]

I nominate the “we are killing the earth” picture of the earth in comparison from 1978 to 2012

[brucebocchi]

the dog with the slice of ham on its face that everyone thought was a gigantic burn scar

[adataraxia]

“Tequila is the only alcohol thats not a depressant so you can drink as much of it as you like”

[softurl]

[sasukehateblog]

that post with the picture of the joker without makeup and people thinking it was a real person and defending him

[painisthecleanser]

that photo of voldemort being passed off as an aborted fetus

[stankyleg-deactivated2918973]

The two way mirror

[rinlockhart]

“listen here, cumslut.”

[tenaflyviper]

I can’t believe you guys forgot someone trying to pass off a picture of the inside of a fig as a microscopic view of the inside of a vagina.

[nyokoko]

I can’t believe I was on Tumblr for every single one of these posts.

[passion-of-l0vers]

all the links on this post are broken and some arent given so heres a compilation of links for the stupidest things tumblr has believed (i tried to find the og post for most of these but some of them are posts/articles about said posts)

infinite chocolate hack

berensta/ein bears (mandela effect)

mri scan walking dead gif

train gif brain thinks you died

tubby custard machine

horse dildo

moonmelon (and variations)

alexandria’s genisis

bird chocolate fountain og post

soap shrinks water molecules

we are killing the earth

ham on dog

tequila isnt a depressant

earth is lumpy

joker without makeup

voldemort fetus

two way mirror og post

fig vagina

[carillonghorn]

[tender8-deactivated20230104]

[angelsguideher]

[bunneis-archive]

[difty-dift]

are you fucking serious

[illusioncanthurtme]

Oh FUCK OFF

[bunneis-archive]

so theres more

[instant-oatmeal]

[765576509880909575-deactivated2]

men will make a reddit post saying their gf is weird and then describe the coolest woman imaginable

[through-a-historic-lens]

New York police officer fires his .38 service revolver at almost point-blank range into a piece of bulletproof glass, with a very brave test subject behind it, 1931.

[onion-souls]

What experimental value does a whole living guy add to this

[secretaryofdarkness]

Cops don’t shoot their guns if there’s no potential for civilian harm. It’s a motivator.

[dct239394cvvd098dffgggp]

see you later aligator is in the past. the gang says its been real baby seal now

[dct239394cvvd098dffgggp]

take care polar bear

[ace-kaz-brekker]

Every time I see a bunch of posts from Neil Gaiman on my feed I think, "Neil... you're procrastinating writing again, aren't you"

[ace-kaz-brekker]

Neil.

[writingadvicecollections]

Good to know we're not the only ones procrastinating. XD

[guccifloralsuits]

I’m sorry but I’ll never be able to see DJ khalid for anything other than refusing to eat pussy. that will always be his legacy to me

[verpine95]

[knfwinthemorning-deactivated202]

[hypothetical-happiness-blog]

[nelladee]

Know your roses guys Or you just might fuck up the moment

[gothzarya-deactivated20220622]

and you dont want to do that ._. 

[aeloro]

salmon is for desire

[breethingout]

what am I looking at

[shigatsuyuutsu-blog]

I can’t even remember how many times I’ve reblogged this anymore

[pcktknife]

im about to start screaming

[pcktknife]

[hearteyes-wheeler]

Peak meme usage me thinks

[pearlwingdraws]

My brother’s take on tonight’s events

[arkashas]

[sandmandaddy69]