everywhere I go, there is knife cat

like, you know, nya. she/they, ace ace baby

[knifecatanthology]

[wheeloffortune-design]

my friends just gave birth to twins, but they're very picky about names, and will not name a child until they fall in love with a name. for their first born it took weeks.

now, they found ONE name they liked. so currently we have to ask "how are Suzie and the other one?". which is hilarious.

[wheeloffortune-design]

The other twin finally has a name. It's been three weeks. In the chatroom she had been dubbed Air Conditioning because it was the most beautiful thing in the world.

[knifecatanthology]

so it turns out if you use corn syrup instead of cornstarch your pastry cream will end up separating and also cursed by the baking gods

[knifecatanthology]

i have been informed by someone better educated on the matter that the actual problem is the recipe told me to use a hand mixer when adding the milk to the eggs

[knifecatanthology]

tried again with better recipe that has clear, detailed instructions for non-expert bakers

[knifecatanthology]

so it turns out if you use corn syrup instead of cornstarch your pastry cream will end up separating and also cursed by the baking gods

[knifecatanthology]

i have been informed by someone better educated on the matter that the actual problem is the recipe told me to use a hand mixer when adding the milk to the eggs

[knifecatanthology]

so it turns out if you use corn syrup instead of cornstarch your pastry cream will end up separating and also cursed by the baking gods

[yujateaandpi]

Was driving with my grandmother and in broken English she says “no eyes… no nose… no face. Don’t trust.” To which I looked around wildly in search of this omen of ill portend.

Cybertruck. It was a cybertruck.

[littledeviantsworld-deactivated]

bilf (book i'd like to finish)

[whyenn-reader]

ADHD advice from non-ADHD people: start blocking out your day and put things in your google calendar

ADHD advice from ADHD people: any time you're waiting for your food to microwave YOU HAVE TO WASH DISHES WASH AS MANY AS YOU CAN THIS IS A RACE AGAINST TIME THIS IS THE ONLY TIME THIS COULD HAPPEN

[spin-the-wheel-polls]

Stuck in a historical war

You are stuck as a soldier in this historical war

(this is a magical universe where people who wouldn't usually be able to fight would. so you can all suffer.)

How are you doing?

good somehow

I might survive

OW

dead

results/other

Remaining time: 1 day 22 hours

[knifecatanthology]

just had the fascinating experience of finding a written-for-specific-character song that went so hard i actually got mildly annoyed by how good it was and then finding out that at least the lyrics were AI generated and getting actually mad about it because holy fuck they are just. describing the story. you could totally write that yourself but no. am I even allowed to enjoy this song now

[d897gyhaujfkedw7r9euwijkjfkdl]

Lady in drive through had a bearded dragon sitting on her boobs and she held it up and let me pet it. killing myself canceled

[d897gyhaujfkedw7r9euwijkjfkdl]

art is not my strong suit but this is my best recreation of what i saw when i opened the window. i have to emphasize that she was supermodel levels of gorgeous

[birdplushie]

"it's not that deep" START DIGGING!!

[magn-animously]

DIG

[14-opossums-in-a-trenchcoat]

DIG

[buriedunderyourmum]

DIG

[hannisconfused]

DIG

[kitsunesakii]

DIG

[yourlocalfandomfriendo]

DIG

[apple-notplural]

DIG

[vivitur-moritur]

DIG

[spacecat24-7]

DIG

[chub-froggy]

DIG

[thatghostthateatspeople]

DIG

[krowbreaker]

DIG

[spid-the-spider]

DIG

[annabelle--cane]

DIG

[yellow-faerie]

DIG

[vampiraptor]

[philosopherking1887]

OOPS TOO DEEP

[raccoonmilf]

Chat, is it considered “abusive roommate behavior” to release a raccoon into the living space after you have asked your roommate for months to please clean up their messes (they do not pay any of the mortgage)

[raccoonmilf]

For context, when I used to live alone I would do something called “Princess Time” where I would do an initial sweep (to remove any significant hazards) and then I would release a raccoon into the living area and clean. This helped because I would 1) feel like a princess and 2) the raccoon would bring attention to things my ADHD brain had decided to ignore and I’d quickly clean that stuff up.

So like, if I’m expected to clean the house now, I will be doing it in the way that is most effective for me. And anything that has not been cleaned up after months of having sit-down talks and sending reminders and being promised things will change, might be deemed “trash” by the trash panda and thrown away.

[raccoonmilf]

We haven’t done since we moved into the house, because I didn’t want to cause my roommate or their cats destress or have their things destroyed by a raccoon

[raccoonmilf]

I am a raccoon biologist and one of the few people in the state allowed to take in captive bred raccoons that had been possessed illegally. The raccoon in the photos is Moonshine, but she is currently at the animal sanctuary where I work as I had been quarantining multiple new intakes from an abuse case. I still have two males (Rum Tum Tugger and Electra) left in my home enclosure as we are getting them neutered and then hopefully sending them to an AZA accredited zoo.

I wanna make things very clear that underneath all the whimsy, I am a trained professional.

[raccoonmilf]

Those vibes are likely because I’m the original creator of Dashcon and my personality has not changed since 2012 lmao

[fipindustries]

[toskarinfr]

logically I Know it's an irrational thought to have but it still irritates me to no end when stuff that's super popular gets the exact intended emotional reaction out of me

[toskarinfr]

me, with tears in my eyes: how will I ever recover. I fell for it, like some kind of The Masses

[egberts]

i got that dog in me but it's poorly socialized and i don't take it on as many walks as i should

[theriverbeyond]

i think "turning into a pumpkin" is my new favorite way to articulate the state of things when I am at a function and very overstimulated and it feels like my brain is melting. it's like no i can't be a person anymore i have to leave i'm turning into the pumpkin. the time is up yeah i gotta go. yeah see u later. pumpkin time.

[mikufanclub]

remember when teachers would tell you to fold paper hamburger or hotdog style. kind of sounds like some fake shit but just another example of burger centric american thinking

[mikufanclub]

non americans in the tags doubting if this is true. you think burger is a fucking joke to us??