so about that Irken society-
Thinking about this post by aperfecttimeforscreaming, because I love it and it drips with the exact flavour of existential dread I imagine living under the Irken Empire actually comes with (if any of its citizens wind up with enough spare time to stop and think about it).
But I’m making a separate post cuz I feel like an absolute asshat writing a rambling essay on someone else’s post whomp whomp
Basically, I hc that Irken society is a cautionary tale of late-stage capitalism & rampant consumerism, where Irkens ARE their jobs to the point they are referred to by their role/rank before their name. And not just higher ranking Irkens like commander Poki. Even table-headed-service-drone Bob gets the whole mouthful of his full job title spewed out (unless he’s being condescended to), and he’s probably among the lowest ranking Irkens out there. The gap between high and low ranking members of their society is so enormous the lowest ranking members are forced to crawl around as literal furniture for the elites. And there is. Literally. No reason for the table-headed-service-drones to exist beyond the amusement of their superiors (and/or a very public punishment for stepping out of line) Like, they’re more than capable of putting a serving tray on treads or something, and frankly, that would probably work better than forcing some poor asshole to hobble around without spilling anyone’s drinks. So this entire class exists solely to highlight the monumental gap between the rich/tall and poor/short (I would just say between the largest and smallest, but money does seem to play some sort of role in social standing, as we see with Bob talking back to Purple when he thought he was going to be a millionaire.)
Irkens begin training for a productive career literally from the moment of their hatching, and I assume the grand majority of them work right up until the day they die. It’s like the absolute illogical extreme of rise-and-grind culture, where if an activity is not demonstratively beneficial to the Empire, it’s considered a waste of time. And Irkens have such little spare time, it would be extra stupid to waste it.
Like I’ve mentioned before that I don’t think ‘hobbies’ are A Thing among Irkens, because their society is pretty much built on instant gratification. Why piss away what little free time you have between shifts baking a cake when you can just pop into the nearest bakery and buy one that’s going to look and probably taste better than anything you could make on your own? Buying stuff benefits the Irken economy, and then that Irken has a bit more spare time to veg out and passively watch some Irken-produced and/or approved TV, or perhaps do some more shopping if they’ve got the monies. It’s why Zim never stopped to do shit for himself just for the fun of it, like paint or put together puzzles, until he wound up in a position where he literally had the rest of time to not be justifiably productive. Even then, who even knows how long he kept working on his mission before it finally sank in that nothing he did mattered because he was stuck in a time loop.
Basically, Irkens exist in this self-feeding loop of eating, sleeping, and breathing in how Irk is the Best, and by extension Irkens are the Best, and Irk is only as Great as it is (and has infinite capacity to be Even Greater) due to all Irkens doing their Best. Because the Irken machine needs every happy little cog working at full capacity in their proper place for things to run smoothly. I think this is ultimately where PAKs and the Control Brains rose from- because Irkens are the Best (but there were still ways they could be better- maybe if they slept less so they could work longer and didn’t need to keep taking so many breaks to eat and defecate. And the Control Brains were designed to be truly Perfect- entities of pure logic, devoid of personal desire beyond the further expansion and improvement of Irken society. They could depose the Tallest and run the entire show if only they had the slightest shred of ambition)
However, at this point, I think the Irken Empire is actually just a gigantic Rube Goldberg machine- this massive, intricate, brilliant machine that churns and whirrs and ultimately accomplishes nothing. Their entire culture, history, and society has been sanitized, simplified, and rewritten/refined so often over the centuries there’s just… nothing of substance left beneath all the self aggrandizing. Maybe there was a reason for their obsession with domination at some point in the distant past, but that reason has been long forgotten, and now their war-mongering ways are so deeply woven into their identity that they just conquer without having any plans for the planets they’re subjugating. They do it just because they’re damn good at it. Irkens are destined to either consume and destroy until there’s literally nothing left, or their massive empire collapses under it’s own bloated weight.
As for the Irkens themselves- I imagine their default state consists of this constant droning ennui numbing them from the inside out if they can’t find anything suitably distracting. Individuals are intensely socially isolated, as they’re raised to be completely independent and to view their peers more as competition than companions. (At least Invaders are, but it’s not hard to imagine it’s a broader Irken trait too.)
It’s like the social media effect; Irkens are fed the image that everyone around them is happy and living their best lives- if an individual is unhappy, then it’s a personal failing. And maybe if they feel dissatisfied they should buy some more stuff. Why, that one crewmate bought the latest phone a couple days ago, and they don’t seem like they’re being slowly eaten alive by a horrible, gnawing sensation that you can’t identify if it’s your soul being crushed or an aching void where a soul should have been if you had one. Maybe you should get a new phone too. That’ll probably help. And if you’re feeling especially hollow between shifts, you can always pop by the vending machine 👍 And yes, you are the Only One That Feels This Way, so don’t embarrass yourself by bringing it up to your coworkers. They’ve got enough of your shit to gossip about already.
Basically, if you’re Irken, good for you! You’re great by default (but you can always be better, and if you fall short of expectations you can always be replaced, and, most importantly, never forget that it can always be worse) If you’re ever overwhelmed by that silly urge to scream and scream and scream until something ruptures in your throat, please be considerate to your fellow Irkens and wait until your scheduled break, then take it to the soundproof rooms out back. It’s not a good look to make your issues everyone else’s problem 😊
