Lachryma / Weeping

mid twenty something. MDNI. he/him. ♿ I eat puritans for breakfast. 🥩 Dominant. collection of musings. mostly erotic blog. Intersex trans queer butchdyke. Undead and past gender. side blog @lachrymosedays

[lachrymalhaze]

I'd taken a bit of a sabbatical from tumblr (as far as posting goes). not entirely back just yet, but been figuring things out in the meantime. like... how people usually tag their blogs for easier organizing.

so, in the spirit of that, tags and a few other things going forward listed below for those interested, this post being subject to being edited whenever there's new additions, etc.

#weepinganswers > for answering submitted asks, q's, etc

#hazybedroomthoughts > anything & everything erotic textposting goes under this

#sensualhaze > erotic audio clips

#lachrymalmusing > sad or poetic writing. more of this may be on the side blog but if its erotic themed in nature prolly end up here. still experimenting

#serioushaze > going forward I intend to try to keep most of this stuff to my side blog @lachrymosedays but some of itll be over here for awareness sake, eg, censorship bills

also as im aware tumblr's kinky space scene has some... quirks, ill lay down a few other expectations.

- if you want to engage sexually with me or want me to fulfill any fantasy at all, I expect to be paid. mutuals can dm, anyone else, $$$$$$$$, I wanna see you put dollars where your mouth is. my cashapp is $lachrymalhaze if youre interested

- i'm here to promote myself and make money first, and learn things and find some community second. i'm new to things. be kind. if youre more experienced im happy to be friends or take any advice that is given freely. xoxoxoxo

- what kinks do i have? who knows. why dont you follow along & find out. or get up close & personal. wink wonk.

otherwise....

zionists can fuck off forever. free palestine (ONE state solution, Palestine). eyes on sudan & congo. land back. Black lives matter. the only good fascist is a dead fascist. no one is free until everyone is free. tme/tma shit is gonna make me pop peoples eyes out their skulls.

[lachrymalhaze]

another stance of mine I'll make loud and clear here on my blog since I interact with a lot of trans content and tumblr occasionally puts stupid shit up on my algorithm:

"TMA/TME" terms are bigoted, useless, intersexist, straight up racist, and I can't believe they're still being unironically thrown around the damn net.

(this post's experiences are also centered in the usa)

Okay. Now that we've got that out of the way: I keep seeing blogs apply "TME" (transmisogyny exempt) to transmasculine people, sapphics in general, butches in general, and cis women.

Oh brother.

Some of you fuckers have incredibly narrow world views, tunnel-vision life experiences, no diversity in your family or friendship groups, no diversity in your social media followings, and boy does it SHOW. It shows. It shooooows. It's a quick block from me and a fast assumption you're white as hell and have a white as hell circle if you throw that shit around willy nilly. Decolonization also means deconstructing such binaries like this: that a "trans's woman's issue" is "only hers" and could only ever affect her. It's not that simple.

A couple of important points.

-) Transmisogyny often affects transmasculine people (trans men included!) because of the hypervisibility of transfeminine people. Medically is where it shows at its worst in my experience. If you spend any time at all listening to trans men talk about trying to get medical care, deal with insurance, get medications, deal with legality around name changes et cetera, you'll find that a LOT of instances revolve around people writ large assuming we are transitioning the other way around (masc to fem, rather than fem to masc), even if they see an F birth marker and see/hear you are taking T.

I'm not going to explain to you in depth at the moment how this means medical discrimination or medical care denial and other headaches for transmasculine people whether by well intentioned individuals or not. look it up. the tldr is we are still treated and seen as women in hospitals, and simultaneously, we are seen and acknowledged as trans and there is hostility in that. People are very uncomfortable with it. Baddies in red states especially I'm sure know what I'm talking about.

-) Many of us start out looking androgynous, do not pass, or stay looking androgynous, or simply cannot pass even if that's the desire or goal.

Not to mention feminine dressing trans men, and black and brown trans men. People on the street don't see a visibly trans person and instantly assume they're a man (or a man worthy of respect) and afford them respect, either. Facial hair and muscles or no. That's made up in your fucking heads. We get stopped on the street by cis men and harassed about if we are "real females." We are at risk of being hate crimed. Pay attention.

-) GNC people, black cis women, cis women of color, indigenous cis women, cis women with PCOS, cis women who for any reason appear unconventional, effeminate gay men, drag queens who are men, boys who grow up in homophobic and transphobic environments expressing feminine presentations, butch women, butch lesbians of all kinds, masculine presenting women, ET CETERA.

...are all at risk of transvestigation and violence thereof. Of being accused of either: "not being a real woman", "trying too hard to be a woman", "being a fake man", "being a sissy", et cetera. And there's a word for that. It's called transmisogyny. Homophobia, lesbophobia, racism, and transmisogyny are inherently intertwined. They aren't inseparably unique units.

And more of you would do well to remember this when you post walls of text that honestly doesn't mean anything at all, aren't grounded in any real lived experiences, real community or real identity, outside of "hurt feelings, I want to be valid and I want to be the most oppressed." Yes, not every person experiences transmisogyny by default, but MANY, many people who are not inherently trans women (or not exclusively) are at risk of experiencing transmisogyny and other forms of violence and abuse, femicide and hate crimes linked to how much of a "real man or woman" they are perceived as.

And anyone could experience (systemic) transmisogyny at any time if they were in the wrong place at the wrong time doing the wrong thing accosted by the wrong, vapid, malicious fucking cunt, someone who wanted to weaponize laws against them for their own gain, hurt them badly or otherwise, even if they were the whitest most feminine perisex cis woman you ever saw. Texas's newest bathroom is a prime example of this kind of fuckery.

Pay. Attention.

Stop arguing over "who is exempt" and "how exempt" and start asking "how many people are affected" and "who is the most at risk" (the answer is MOST OFTEN black trans women and men and intersex people. The answer is an incredibly long list of marginalized identities. The answer is a growing list. The answer is intersectional.) "how do we empower them" "how do we protect them" "how do we empower them to protect themselves long term" "how can I use my specific privileges wherein I dont have (as much of an issue or issue) to keep my friends safe/r" et cetera.

This post is NOT for hatred for trans women/fems either and if anyone reblogs it who's hateful towards trans women you can get impaled on eleven thousand spikes. This post is intended to raise awareness around transmisogyny as a widespread issue and that "exempt" is a chronically online concept.

We keep losing people in our community. Fucking pay attention. Protect trans life.

[lachrymalhaze]

this got reblogged exactly once by some radfem who i blocked and is now keeping getting reblogged by predatory rapist incels, terfs, radfem misogynists etc talking crazy about women and also to me. theyre generally empty blogs who also just reblog others posts and say the same kinds of things to them. wish i could say with certainty theyre all bots but ive seen too many 4channers and redpill freaks here who arent bots talk like this that i dont think so. about to mute the notifications atp but if you happen to check the reblogs please do so with caution. ive blocked over five people.

[disabled-dyke]

begging everyone this disability pride month to stop using just ‘CFS’ when you’re talking about myalgic encephalomyelitis (ME/CFS, because unfortunately ME is also just a word). CFS, chronic fatigue syndrome, completely misrepresents the full disease, making it seem like it’s just ‘tired all the time’. please look up dr fauci’s smear campaign against this illness and why CFS was chosen as a name.

[lachrymalhaze]

late night thoughts about gripping his hair. preferably damp with sweat. gods may help me if he starts whining about it. i'll pull on it just to hear him moan and cry. my own devout sin.

[theartofmadeline]

happy pride to the gay people in my computer <3

[abhorrent-wench]

switch4switch is so underrated

[roycohn]

there's an old anne rice interview circulating on twitter rn that i remember reading ages ago where she makes a pretty salient point about how submissive men who have bdsm fantasies etc will go to a sex worker and basically order the ala carte version of their fantasy to be performed in real life but women don't really have that same option and certainly not at the same point of availability so they read her horny books instead. and honestly that argument has been in the back of my mind every time people get on their high horses about the popularity of booktok romantasy novels or heated rivalry or whatever the "women are horny and we're upset about that" cultural property du jour is ever since. women, especially straight women, have so few outlets for their sexual desires, especially if they have a partner who doesn't share them, and i will never understand why "someone ELSE'S private sexual fantasy makes me uncomfortable and therefore they should not be allowed to engage with it, even if i am in no way being affected by it or even aware of it at all" is such a popular party line among allegedly progressive young people.

[theperksofbeingahugefuckingcunt]

Okay I’m currently furious that migraines are often so blindly easy to treat and I had to find this out myself at the age of 26 when I’ve been to a neurologist since I was 11 lol so I’m about to teach you two neat and fast little tricks to deal with pain!

The first is the sternocleidomastoid muscle, or the SCM muscle.

This big red section is responsible for pain around the eye, cheekbone, and jaw, as well as some temple pain. Literally all you have to do is angle your head down a little, angle it away from the side that hurts, and then you can gently pinch and rub that muscle. I find it best to start at the bottom and travel upwards. The relief is so immediate! You can increase pressure as you feel comfortable doing so.

Here is a short and easy video showing this in action

The second is a fast and easy stretch that soothes your vagus nerve, which is the nerve responsible for calming you down. The vagus nerve, for those unfamiliar, is stimulated by deep breathing such as yawning, sighing, singing, or taking a deep breath to calm your anger in a tense situation.

You can stretch this out by sitting up as straight as possible (this does not have to be perfect to work) and interlacing your fingers. Put your hands on the back of your head with your thumbs going down the sides of your neck and, while keeping your face forward, look all the way to one side with just your eyes. Hold that until you feel the urge to breathe deeply or yawn, or until you can tell there’s a change. Then do the same thing on the other side. When you put your arms down, you should clearly be able to turn your head farther in both directions. If the first session doesn’t get rid of your migraine, rest and repeat as many times as necessary. I even get a little fancy with it and roll my eyes up and down along the outer edge sometimes to stretch as much as I can.

If you need a visual here’s a good video on it. I know some of the language they use seems questionable but this is real and simple science and should not be discarded because it’s been adopted by the trendy wellness crowd!

I seriously cannot believe I didn’t hear a word of this from any doctor in my life. Additionally, if you get frequent recurring migraines, you may want to see a dietician. Migraines can be caused by foods containing histamines, lectin, etc. and can also be caused by high blood pressure in specific situations such as exercise, stress, and even sex.

If any of this information helps you I’d love to hear it btw! It’s so so fast and easy to do. Good luck!

[introvertathome]

Reblogging again because this just saved me from a really bad migraine

[vigilskept]

really i think the most insidious part of white supremacy is the way it will convince white people everything is actually About Them. being called out isn’t about you. poc expressing frustration at your behaviour isn’t about you. it’s about how you are affecting others. step one is literally just de-centre yourself from the conversation. anyone who’s not white has already had to learn this lesson the hard way and it gets tiring waiting for the rest of you to catch up

[creatingblackcharacters]

Imma say this and imma start my day, but

Like I said to the person who was threatening me with their own suicide yesterday (before blocking them), I think it's worth considering why y'all make excuses and/or get defensive when someone says something is racist.

Why are you that upset? If I said the design is racist, why are you telling me every reason you thought it wasn't, as if that's going to make the harm any less upsetting? As if it's going to rationalize it (which, really, underscores that you think there's an overreaction occurring).

"Well I thought it was-" "but I thought it was-" "well to be fair, it's-" why do I have to bring an entire court case of evidence to prove harm, but the harmful party/situation in question gets the automatic benefit of the doubt in your mind?

I get being thorough and not accepting anything at face value. But it doesn't escape me that excusing and rationalizing racism is the default response. If we're doing that every time someone approaches us... You may wonder why y'all don't get approached with said problems.

[guelwaar]

people love the idea of the mean girl nurse pipeline because it problematises medical abuse as a personal perversion rather than understanding it as a product of broadly held ableist values and its like, if this was only about ontologically evil teenage girls choosing to enter a profession because of their unique sadism then you really wouldnt expect to see the exact same forms of abuse pervading all arrangements of paid, unpaid, formal, ad hoc, and familial caretaking as well -- its more comforting to believe the nurse was just a preexisting bad person than that most of the world broadly hates disabled people and will abuse, neglect, and gaslight them if given power over their care

[creatingblackcharacters]

If you like stories with:

Female rage

BLACK female rage

Child rage at abuse

Rage at domestic abuse

Stories about burn victims

Vengeance and the internal conflict that comes with it

Rage against misogyny and the violence that comes with

A "was it worth it" narrative

Good soundtracks

Greek tragedies

Kill Bill

Supporting Black women writers

You're gonna LOVE

[creatingblackcharacters]

1) I've been told it's burn survivors, I apologize and will remember this in the future

2) movie leaves theaters TOMORROW MAY 29TH (or so I heard) so if you haven't seen it yet and you want to, and it's available near you, go do so!!

[spicerackgames]

my femdom monsterfucker demo is now done! I'M FREEEE

if you wanna learn more about it / download it, it's here on itch.io!

features:

nameable fem mc (default is mercedes!)

14,000+ words

5 nonhuman guys to meet (+1 monster bestie)

a fun li'l dressup minigame

enjoy 🫶🏽 (any bugs you catch, just inbox me or comment on my devlog on itch!)

[spookycriticalblog]

Fuck it at this point can y’all actually start supporting indie animation and indie games made by black artists/creators because I’m really getting sick and tired of everyone hyping these racist phase mediocre white people that get 90% of their humor from 2000s newgrounds animations

[creatingblackcharacters]

Idk y'all. I just think at the end of the day if you can't find the strength of conviction to say "saying racial slurs for fun is wrong no matter when it was said, and harm has to be addressed and properly mended" over an overt slur- the easiest possible scenario of testing one's antiracism- God knows where we're gonna find the strength of conviction to uproot white supremacy in every other relevant facet of our lives and system (which is all of it). Because it's gonna be a LOT harder than that and a lot more complex than that.

[bebsi-cola]

it's strange that there's talk about disabled people as if we are either diagnosed or undiagnosed when both groups and indeed all disabled people are on the whole underdiagnosed. like yay you spent 6+ years fighting for an answer. they gave you one that doesn't cover even half the problems you have, was poorly explained to you (if they explained it at all) and with no followup treatment. you're close to right where you started but now there's a little word on your medical files that you can bring out to fail at getting people to take you seriously or other people can bring out to dismiss and mock you.

[maxmag1]

Zulu Mythology Gods, Creation, and Ancestral Power

Zulu Mythology offers a fascinating look into the spiritual world of the Zulu people, blending creation stories, ancestral worship, and powerful deities. Centered around Unkulunkulu, the creator god, this rich tradition explores the roles of sangomas (diviners), sacred animals, and ancestral spirits known as amadlozi. Zulu cosmology bridges the physical and spiritual realms, with rituals, dreams, and ceremonies keeping the connection alive. From myths about eternal life and the cattle of heaven to goddesses like Nomkhubulwane, Zulu mythology remains deeply relevant in modern South African culture, drawing interest from historians, anthropologists, and spiritual seekers worldwide.