The Life of Faie

Hey. I'm Faie. I play games, craft things & spread good vibes.

[ladyfaie]

Dear Doctors,

Ugh.

Why is it so hard to find a Doctor that actually gives a shit about you? I'm sick of always being just another number..

I voice concerns I have and they are brushed under the rug.

Off to find yet another primary doctor and to find my own cardiologist since my primary refuses to help me.

I'm sick and tired of always being sick and tired..

[ladyfaie]

You matter <3

You matter. Even on the days where you don't want too <3

[ladyfaie]

Fuck Off;

Hey you. Yea you. If you've got something to say to someone, say it.

You don't wanna be friends with someone? Say it. You're mad at someone? Say it. You wanna tell someone to fuck off? Say it.

I'm guilty of it as well, not saying something when I want too because I don't want to deal with the aftermath. Don't want to upset other people, bla, bla, blaaaa.

Yet, I've done some soul searching and have come to realize who is there for you, who loves you, and who just says it. There are people that say they are there for you, that they always will be no matter what, but when push comes to shove, well, they'll shove you down and act like you're not even there. Who will walk through the dark with you and those who will leave you there, leaving you wondering why they let go in the first place?

I am quite tired of people acting like friends and everything is fine, when behind closed doors foul things are said, or a situation or person/people are ignored or whatever the case may be.

Life is too short for this shit...

I see this happen to others around me & just myself.

I have come too far in life to let this toxic cycle continue.

So, if I tell you to fuck off, do us both a favor and just fuck off. You can ask me why, but don't expect a filter. Don't be surprised or upset. Take it and fuck off.

That is all.

[ladyfaie]

Here we go...

Time to start my interview soon! Well, I hope it's real & not some sketchy scam! Staying positive!

[thoughtkick]

“To have someone understand your mind is a different kind of intimacy.”

— Unknown

[quotemadness]

“Find a heart that will love you at your worst and arms that will hold you at your weakest.”

— Unknown

[ladyfaie]

Elden Ring

Please, please.

Give to me.

Is anyone else as excited about this game as I am?? It looks AMAZING! I might not have been a Dark Souls fan, but this game has certainly peaked my interests!

[ladyfaie]

Good mornin'

Did you sleep well?

Have pleasant dreams?

Naah, me either x.x

It's coffee time though! Got my first and last cup of the day unless we go get creamer later on x.x I need my creamer! D:

Today should be a good day. We'll see.

There are these two people in the house I live at, friends of the homeowners. This morning when I got out of the bathroom the girl makes eye contact with me, I groggily smile because I'm half asleep and she just stares at me with this rude look on her face.

Umm, fuck you stranger?

Well, if all goes well these next few weeks, we'll be a step closer to our own place and no longer have to live in a fuckin' dungeon.

Baby steps...

Well, time to wake up the brain and figure out what to do for the day.

What are your plans for the weekend?

[ladyfaie]

Another day

It was just another day today. Nothing good, nothing bad. Just another day.

However, The Grove did gain two new faefolk today so that's always great! The community keeps growing every day and I couldn't be happier with that. Slolwy but surly my friends. Small stream, big dreams!

However,

I hate that I feel that way though. Just another day. Every day is the same. It's no fun.

I need to come up with a routine I can follow without interruption. I suck at keeping up with one. I always want too but something in me, I just fall off and wonder why.

Maybe I should start my days here. Typing out how I feel first thing in the morning, what I think the day will be like or even my tarot spread of the morning... hmm..

Well, I'm off to fold some laundry, clean up and finish up a commission all within an hour. Can I do it? Probably not. Am I gonna try. Sure am!

[ladyfaie]

Thank you for surviving the day.

How are you today?

I know it was a long day but hey, you made it! That's so great. Tell me about your day. I'm all ears <3

[ladyfaie]

Inventory growing!

Got some more things done today! Gotta keep going. Gotta keep going...

Here's a couple samples of my work. If you'd like to see more of them, check out my Instagram page and then check out the Facebook page for more details!

[ladyfaie]

Making the day better

Workin' on making my day better. It started out rough, and I still feel pretty down but I am trying to counter that. Working on some items now to add to my inventory & hopefully sell them soon <3

I just started my IG profile for my crafts if you're interested <3

https://www.instagram.com/tricraftcrafts/

[ladyfaie]

This is why I don't speak much anymore

It's been a while since I posted anything. Looking back, I was pretty positive when I was.

Not today.

Days like today make me wonder why I'm here. Why I'm even alive. All I ever seem to do is aggravate the people I love, or that love me. Just for speaking. Just for trying to agree. Just for being me..

You don't yell at people you love... and you certainly don't use the sentence "This isn't me yelling, you don't want to hear me yell"

You know who says that? People that are yelling at you @.@

Is what it is I suppose...

Now that I got it out, I can go back to my commission work... *sigh*

[ladyfaie]

Bam! Kickin' today's butt again!

First thing I did when I woke up after washing my face, which is another routine I have to get back into, but I made my GI follow up appointment!

The office lady was a bit rude, which is one of the things that makes me so nervous when I have to make a phone call but I have to remind myself that it's okay. Not everyone is going to sound nice or even be nice, but that doesn't mean I should hide away. If someone is having a bad day, or is just a grump in general, it's not my fault and it's okay. The phone call lasted only a few minutes & it was something productive and good for me!

What else is on the agenda for today?

Meditation & some tarot work, along with coloring in some pages of my agenda.

I'll probably tidy up a bit, do another load of laundry & than play some games. Maybe I'll even stream today depending on how I feel after the cleaning. Either way, it's a good day and I'll keep that going!

[ladyfaie]

Next step;

Today, I conquered & tomorrow I shall too.

Next step, not having an anxiety attack every time I have to make a phone call >.<

Tomorrow I have a call to make. Set up an appointment. Simple... for normal people @_@

I'll keep you updated on how long it takes me to do 😅

[ladyfaie]

I did it!

Don't ever let anyone bring you down, including yourself! You can do anything you want, as long as you work towards it and stay positive!

I got my drivers license today! :D

For such a long time I was so worried, and felt so bad about myself. That I was a loser because I didn't have my license yet. It wasn't that I didn't know how to drive, I was just nervous to take the test, to have a stranger in the car. Someone who is there to quite literally judge me on what I'm doing. I have horrible anxiety. Crippling at times, so this was a huge thing for me to do, but I got the courage and got it done!

Do yourself a favor, don't compare where you are in life to other people and their lives. You are exactly where you need to be right now, don't worry and stress to compete. Life isn't a competition, and that something I am still learning.

Do you, be happy & live life the best you can.

Today, for the first time in my life, I am proud of myself <3

[ladyfaie]

You're doing great today. You got out of bed and I'm so proud of you! Keep going. You got this.

-Me