[lilyblisslys]

there should be a cool, chill way to say things like “I’m struggling” or “I’m having a hard time” that doesn’t imply you might have needs

[chongoblog]

ITS APRIL 13 YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS

FETCH ME NEIL

[chongoblog]

[chongoblog]

HAPPY BIG TWENTY NEIL

[dragon-in-a-fez]

keep thinking about how I wrote in my dissertation about how every time a new form of public/social space emerges it's immediately popular with kids and teenagers who see it as a chance at freedom and then adults colonise it and kick them out. this happened with malls in the 80s and diners in the 50s and pool halls in the 20s. my dad was doing research on this trend in like 1975. and I was like "yeah so this is going to happen to the internet" and then five years later every government suddenly decided to ban kids from everywhere online. I hate being right especially when I don't even get paid for it

[aster-is-confused]

i think a lot of people assume that acknowledging covid is still a major issue would mean going back to early 2020 lockdowns. when that is just not the case at all

we know a lot more about how covid spreads now (primarily aerosols, not droplets) and have effective and well-studied mitigation tools (high-quality respirators, air filtration, increased air flow) that don't require you to significantly alter your life and routine

like literally if we just made masking and air purifiers the norm in public spaces, it would save so many lives and make these spaces so much more accessible

[senatortedcruz]

[segamascott]

i would get out and VOTE

[so-much-for-subtlety]

create a safe space for queer voices

[renslice]

engage in peaceful protest and boycott labubu for 1 day

[milf--adjacent]

I'm getting a job inside the labubu asteroid to help make change from within

[roycohn]

the only truly funny joke anyone's ever made about easter and every year i forget about it and then get to laugh and laugh anew

[reinvent-and-believe]

Harrison Browne as Connors Heated Rivalry

[ducksbellorum]

In 2015 I saw the Martian in theaters like five times on five dates with five different guys. Greatest hustle of all time.

Now I'm married so who the FUCK am I going to scam to take me to Project Hail Mary four more times?!

[thickness-protection-program]

Staff can't censor this

👉🏿👌🏿

[hiamigoman]

[icarus-suraki]

Happy Easter.

[brawltogethernow]

RIP Adrien Agreste you would have loved making superhero/supermodel puns. Unfortunately you speak a language where the main word for model is mannequin which is still thematic but a lot more existentially threatening.

[liarsblade]

Yeah you're right. It WOULD be pretty fucked up if you were a swan but you were raised by ducks and you grew up never seeing another swan or even knowing that such a thing as a swan even existed so you just thought you were a duck with something super wrong with it.

[liarsblade]

[a-potato-of-death]

[worldheritagepostorganization]

World Heritage Post

[atomikats]

went on a bit of a daniel craig movie marathon recently just take it

[adobe-outdesign]

In honor of April Fool's, Bulbapedia has released the funniest prank possible in the form of a Pokopia-based page on Humans

and my personal favorite

[elegybeatty]

harsh but fair

[realm-sweet-realm]

Love that the ability is existential panic.

[dark-magician-girl-meets-world]

What will one day destroy each of the 50 US States

Alabama - Absorbed by Wyoming Alaska - Absorbed by Wyoming Arizona - Absorbed by Wyoming Arkansas - Absorbed by Wyoming California - Attempts to contain the spread of Wyoming by rigging itself with nuclear bombs Colorado - Absorbed by Wyoming Connecticut - Absorbed by Wyoming Delaware - Absorbed by Wyoming Florida - Missing, presumed absorbed by Wyoming Georgia - Absorbed by Wyoming Hawaii - Absorbed by Wyoming after the state survived California's suicide attack and continued to grow Idaho - Absorbed by Wyoming Illinois - Sacrifices itself trying to give Kentucky enough time to find the lost sword Indiana - Absorbed by Wyoming Iowa - Absorbed by Wyoming Kansas - Absorbed by Wyoming Kentucky - Attempts to wield the Wyoming Slayer alone and is not strong enough Louisiana - Absorbed by Wyoming Maine - Absorbed by Wyoming Maryland - Absorbed by Wyoming Massachusetts - Attempts to wield the Wyoming Slayer alone, and is not strong enough Michigan - Absorbed by Wyoming Minnesota - Absorbed by Wyoming Mississippi - Absorbed by Utah Missouri - Begs Utah not to go down this path, and is cut down Montana - Absorbed by Wyoming Nebraska - Absorbed by Utah Nevada - Tries to offer itself as a servant to Wyoming, telling it that together they could rule the world, but is absorbed New Hampshire - Absorbed by Utah New Jersey - Absorbed by Utah New Mexico - Gives its energy to Utah in the hopes that it will be able to stop Wyoming New York - Absorbed by Wyoming North Carolina - Attempts to wield the Wyoming Slayer alone, and is not strong enough North Dakota - Absorbed by Utah Ohio - Absorbed by Wyoming Oklahoma - Absorbed by Wyoming seconds after it finishes deciphering the runes on the handle of the Wyoming Slayer, managing only to croak out the word, "Too" Oregon - Absorbed by Wyoming Pennsylvania - Absorbed by Wyoming Rhode Island - Absorbed by Utah South Carolina - Sacrifices itself in order to get the Wyoming Slayer to Utah South Dakota - Absorbed by Utah Tennessee - Absorbed by Utah Texas - Absorbed by Utah Utah - Attempts to wield the Wyoming slayer and is burnt by its protective magics Vermont- Absorbed by Wyoming Virginia - Plunges itself into the gullet of the ever growing Wyoming to recover the sword which it ate Washington - Absorbed by Wyoming West Virginia - Absorbed by Wyoming Wisconsin - Cries, "I know what Oklahoma meant!" as it readies itself for its last stand. "Not 'too'! Together! It must be used together!" then reaches its arms into the monster's mouth, and takes hold of the sword with Virginia and with all the other states that have been eaten and lends its strength to all of them for one final attack, even as Wyoming's claws dig into its farmlands Wyoming - Stands startled for a few seconds, before beginning to crumble

[togepete]

Can I ask a sex question

I started masturbating analy with one finger and it felt good but not great like i never got anywhere and git kind of bored

What's......... what's the question

[volpalope]

[doppoppin]

i absolutely love how gintama fansubbers never take much liberty with the dialogues while translating to make it easier for the audience to understand and instead opt to put an entire wall of text over the screen providing the context and explaining the linguistic and semantic nuance of the joke like yes tell me all about the causes and symptoms of this one penis infection so that i can understand the 5 very specific dick jokes gintoki is going to make simultaneously in a row in the next 60 seconds