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if i look back, i am lost
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Sweet Seals For You, Always
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art blog(derogatory)
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Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
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KIROKAZE
we're not kids anymore.
Game of Thrones Daily
shark vs the universe
Love Begins
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@lesbakerstuff
ME: hold up. you see that? train's been through here FRIEND: how can you tell ME: tracks. they're not fresh, maybe 60, 80 years old FRIEND: no chance it'll come back, then ME: don't be so sure. That's well within their lifespan... and they're highly territorial
auto immune disorders happen when the immune system ignores regulatory factors and begins attacking healthy bodily tissues, due to what scientists refer to as "sheer love of the game"
I lowkey hate when programs talk to me in a friendly way. "don't worry, nearly there!" Shut up. It should say "loading 64.3% completed. Do not turn off device" and absolutely nothing else. You arent my friend you are computer. Act like it
This post is Murderbot approved.
fallow 🦌
Turning the cuck chair around backwards to show I'm not like your other, boring cuckolds
*youth pastor voice* you know who else got nailed while all his friends watched? that's right,
there are too many things happening this summer that i'm thinking we are going to need an extra 6-12 months of june and possibly another 3-4 months of july. probably no extra august as the problem should hopefully sort itself out by then. we are also looking into extending the day night cycle to 55 hours and extending the human lifespan to 10000 years.
8 hours of decent sleep will have you thinking things like 'i am a beautiful horse and i will never die'
2 hours of bad sleep will have you thinking things like 'i am a stranded whale and i need to be covered in dynamite in an ill-advised attempt to clear the beach'
in the dungeon you will have to face a monster with the nose of a tiger, the teeth of a tiger, the ears of a tiger the eyes of a tiger , the cheeks of a tiger , the neck of a tiger, the torso of a tiger, the arms of a tiger, the paws of a tiger, the belly of a tiger the back of a tiger, the the legs of a tiger, the claws of a tiger, the ankles of a tiger, the tail of the tiger, the mind of a tiger, and the power of a tiger
Mesopotamian girl sending clay tablets to her best friend who lives five city states to the west: what if..... Enkidu begot Gilgamesh with child?🤭
children are so fucking funny man. i just overheard a kid go “i just learned a new way to pinch, wanna see it? it hurts a lot more!” followed by a loud, notably pained scream
Rolled up the living room rug to clean my apartment/make dinner on roller skates because I suddenly remembered that I’m an adult with free will…..Life is beautiful
my betrothed just got home…..it’s always Why we’re you using kitchen knives on skates don’t do that again and never How was rollercooking did you have fun rollercooking
Remember in 2010 when Taio Cruz said "I throw my hands up in the air sometimes"? I appreciated his restraint. You can't just throw your hands up in the air whenever. There's a time and a place, and that time was 2010, and the place was the club.
ominous omen girl: 2 years, 7 months, 2 days.
me: Yea thats prolly nothing
ominous omen girl: Its definitely something. and really bad.
me: Nah probably i dont need to ever worey about that like ever
ominous omen girl: You should really start worrying about it now because its really bad
me: Nahhhhhh sounds fine. Yeaaaaaap. Sounds finw. Hey are you single
ominous omen girl: [threatened] I have a boyfriend and he lifts weights
me: [offended] You have a Boy friend? Seriously girl? Whats wrong with you... You should be yuri... You should be yuritastic
ominous omen girl: 2 years, 6 months, 2 days
me: Did you just take a month off
ominous omen girl: I can do that. It's allowed
me: W.T.F. This is Bull Shit
gen z is trying to cancel the mysterious and horrible obelisk im building at the edge of town
dont store a knife with the point facing down, it damages the blade. no, dont do that either. when you store it with the point facing up you might accidentally hurt yourself when you try to grab it. dont store a knife at all actually. your blade must never leave your hand, always ready, ruthless and waiting. you know deep down that ever since you learned the stench of blood you will never be able to cast it aside. or just get a sheath for it i guess.
something something extremely sexy when magic users resort to physical violence. yeah i have the power of god and anime on my side but i also have THESE HANDS. i cast Punch You In The Face. i take my magic staff through which i channel the vast energies of the elements and the cosmos and i cast Severe Concussion And Skull Fracture. casting time for xenoglossy too long, chose the quicker route of Stab You In The Throat.
the road OUT of hell is also paved with good intentions. That’s just kind of the main road we’ve got
People think hell can afford TWO roads? In this economy? You're taking the Good Intentions Highway both directions, mate.
