Monarch of Dumbassery

[beardedmrbean]

[theman]

I GOT A FUCKING RAISE THE POTATO WORKED WTF

[tattooedzombigirl]

This potato works. Every. Fucking. Time.

[lifehas0meaning]

i fucking need all the luck i can get

[lifehas0meaning]

Nadaan Parindey and Kun Faya Kun are basically the musical equivalent of weed

[themodernmirza]

Lucifer Morningstar

Lucifer Morningstar, the Devil, they call

from the grace of God, did he fall

or so they say, don’t know whether the story’s true or not

many scholars, writers and poets haven’t forgot

for he’s interpreted in many art, literature or stories of glory and shame

or a Faustus contract set for a sealed path to fame

they called the Devil the father of lies

but for someone who’s sin is meant to be pride, lying wouldn’t be so wise

from the New Testament to Milton’s Paradise Lost

the devil’s been portrayed but at what cost?

for he’s supposed to be evil and a sinner

how many consider him to be the winner?

yes, it’s true he lead a rebellion in his arrogance

dismissing his loyalty and his elegance

but it was a mistake he probably realised ages ago

why do people still consider him to be a foe?

he’s the one who dwells with the damned souls

every soul full of misery and guilt he punishes and consoles

i have never met the devil, nor have you

wouldn’t know what he is like or have a clue

but for what i have perceived, he’s just a wayward son, with mischief under his sleeve

just a fallen angel waiting to be redeemed

the one who fell and the one who’ll rise

Lucifer Morningstar, the Lightbringer, no more the king of lies

-Karmanbir Singh Chauhan

[lifehas0meaning]

To literally everyone that follows me, WHY?

I don't post anything, neither am I particularly active. What do you people even see in me?

[lesbianfreyja]

the phrase “curiosity killed the cat” is actually not the full phrase it actually is “curiosity killed the cat but satisfaction brought it back” so don’t let anyone tell you not to be a curious little baby okay go and be interested in the world uwu

[violet-nomad-deactivated2018120]

See also:

Blood is thicker than water The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb.

Meaning that relationships formed by choice are stronger than those formed by birth.

[espurr-roba]

Let’s not forget that “Jack of all trades, master of none” ends with “But better than a master of one.”

It means that being equally good/average at everything is much better than being perfect at one thing and sucking at everything else. So don’t worry if you’re not perfect at something you do! Being okay is better!

[theshantiestme11ophone]

These made me feel better

[thelifeofatubaplayer]

Also, “great minds think alike” ends with “but fools rarely differ”

It goes to show that conformity isn’t always a good thing. And that just because more than one person has the same idea, doesn’t necessarily mean it’s a good idea.

[eattheacid]

what the fuck why haven’t i heard the full version to any of these 

[terror-billie]

“Birds of a feather flock together” ends with “until the cat comes.”

It’s actually a warning about fair-weather friends, not an assessment of how complementary people are.

[engel-tier-deactivated20180213]

I’ve always felt like these were cut down on purpose.

[washington-acp]

I really like these phrases and plan on spreading this knowledge.

[alwayswillgraham]

The early bird catches the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

[its-kks-world]

I want to make designs out of these.

[sunderlorn]

Funny how all the half-finished ones encourage uniformity and upholding the status-quo, while the complete proverbs encourage like…living exciting, eclectic lives driven by choice and personal passion.

[manicpussydreamboi]

i learnt the great minds think alike one years ago from this post and i started saying it and i’m not exaggerating when i say the amount of people i’ve indirectly thought the correct thing who are all amazed at it and some even continue to use it is really cool

[irenic-esthetic]

@lifehas0meaning

[lifehas0meaning]

[freyfall]

a lesson on nonbinary individuals and why we feel the way we do about numerous basic things, such as the mere fact of our existence and our pronouns.

[smolanxiouscatvoids]

At first I thought this was about bisexuality whoops

[rainbowsnowflake]

I thought it was abt asexuality 🙈

[casmick-consequences]

[genzfanfix]

when you’re bi and enby 👾

[fiachdubh]

Some solidarity for bi/ace/nb

[kurtwagnermorelikekurtwagnerd]

it's 2022. donald trump has died in disgrace days after being impeached and jailed. my chemical romance's new album is coming out the same day as the new spiderverse movie. the lizzo and janelle monaé collab song is blowing up the radio. lil nas x has a verse in it. you and your partner have time and energy for dates after work after jeff bezos' assets have been seized and distributed to the public in the wake of his arrest for keeping employees in unsafe working conditions.

[baconis42]

oh what a life

[dee-the-red-witch]

Like to charge, reblog to cast.

[jemariel]

Everyone has been vaccinated for free and the virus hasn’t caused a single death in months.

Those dates you go on with your partner? They’re in public. Unmasked. Your server smiles at you. Everyone feels safe.

You can hug your friends.

You can see a movie. The people in the movie are gay people of color and they kiss and live happily ever after.

And so will you.

[do-angels-dream-of-starry-seas]

LIKE TO CHARGE, REBLOG TO CAST

[burningrosepassion-deactivated2]

Like to charge, reblog to cast.

[kitchenwitchupinthisbitch]

I call this into fruition

[crowsent]

fucking MANIFEST

[bettydraperlookingpissed]

[goldkat-g0negrey-deactivated201]

reblog the Don Draper of getting a job he’s unqualified for and you’ll have 10 years of getting jobs you’re unqualified for

[mediocrepresident]

YES

[fortangel]

No but my dad actually did this at McDonalds in the 70s!

So here’s a true story: my father, sometime in the 70s was looking for his first job. He went to the local McDonalds and told the staff, [manager’s name] said I was supposed to start today. They took his word for it and started training him and by the time the manager saw him and asked who he was, people just said “oh that’s the new guy.”

Somehow this actually worked. My dad worked there for a couple of years as a cook. He even won an award plaque which he had on the wall until the day he died.

[trilllizard666]

Confidence Helps

[advanced-procrastination]

Me, walking into FBI Headquarters:

“Name’s Burt Macklin, I work here now.”

[inritum]

reblog and make a wish! this was removed from tumbrl due to “violating one or more of Tumblr’s Community Guidelines”, but since my wish came true the first time, I’m putting it back. :)

[ghostdog07]

OH MY FUCKING GOD, IT’S BACK ON MY DASH.

THIS SHIT WORKS OKAY, I AM DEAD SERIOUS.

The last time I saw this on my dash, I didn’t think it would happen, so jokingly I wished I could go to a fun. concert.

AND GUESS WHAT, I WENT TO A FUCKING FUN. CONCERT.

THIS SHIT WORKS, TRY IT.

[deathklaue]

YOOOOOOO

I SAW THIS ON MY DASH THE OTHER DAY AND THOUGHT “ITS WORTH A TRY” SO I WISHED I COULD GET A 3DS

LITERALLY LIKE 4 DAYS LATER MY DAD SENT ME A PICTURE OF THE 3DS XL HE BOUGHT FOR ME WHILE I WAS AT SCHOOL

IM STILL FREAKING OUT ABOUT THIS

[doryishness]

holy fuck, I didn’t expect this to work, I was like psh, whatever it’s just a quick reblog, but I wished my Dad would actually respond back to me AND HE FUCKING DID A FEW DAYS LATER, I GOT A FUCKING TEXT FROM MY DAD TODAY WHO HASN’T SPOKEN OR RESPONDED TO ME IN MONTHS HOLY FUCK WHAT IS THIS MAGIC IT WORKS. 

[victoriaringsinyourears]

I WANTED TO SEE MY BOYFRIEND AND I DIDN’T THINK I’D GET DAYS OFF BUT THIS WEEKEND I’M HEADING UP THERE??? THIS IS CRAZY SHIT 

[lenshade]

SO LIKE I JOKINGLY WISHED FOR MY OWN LEN KAGAMINE AND THEN LIKE A WEEK LATER I GOT A LEN NENDOROID??? H ELP

[themixedbagofwhat]

WTF OKAY SO THIS SHOT ACTUALLY WORKS BECAUSE WHEN I WISHED, I HAD WISHED MY CRUSH WOULD LIKE ME BACK AND GUESS WHAT? I HAVE A BOYFRIEND NOW. WHAT THE HELLLLL?????

[wodkat]

ok I’ve said this before but IM DOING IT AGAIN THE FIRST TIME I SAW THIS, MY WISH DID COME TRUE SO I REBLOGED AGAIN AND SAID IT IN THE TAGS BUT THEN I WISHED FOR SMTH ELSE AND IT LITERALLY LITERALLY HAPPENED LIKE A COUPLE DAYS LATER WHAT THE HELL SO NOW IM WRITING THIS HERE FOR YOU BC I DONT BELIEVE IN THIS CRAP BUT STILL IT’S AN AWFULLY BIG COINCIDENCE

[openyourthird-eye]

OKAY I SWEAR TO GOD THIS THING WORKS YOU HAVE TO PATIENT BC I WISHED THAT I COULD MOVE AWAY FROM MY SHITTY TOWN TO A WARM PLACE AND GUESS WHAT THIS JULY IM MOVING TO NORTH CAROLINA OKAY GUYS IM NOT MAKING THIS UP I AM SO CONFUSED ACTUALLY THIS IS GREAT BYE

[lifehas0meaning]

Tumblr magic do your thing

[hman]

“…Trump’s star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame was destroyed early Wednesday morning in what looks to be a Tinseltown first.”

[dinomoder]

Blessed Image

[kimidakewooooo]

reblog in less than 30 seconds for good luck

[lifehas0meaning]

I really don’t care about Trump but reblogging for the good luck part

[lookatmeenoww-deactivated201301]

Okay seriously. Reblog if you're OLDER than 11.

[danisontnonfire]

why is it that not more than 1/20 of Tumblr haven’t reblogged this

[sparky-kasane]

I may have already reblogged this once, but I’m doing it again just to be safe

[steppingonshatteredglass-deacti]

ha just barely though

[lifehas0meaning]

I’m gonna assume this does not mean mental age because if it were, more than half of tumblr wouldn’t qualify

[lifehas0meaning]

What are your favorite food combos?

What would you name your boat if you had one?

Write 3 compliments to yourself :)

Food combos would probably be - Rajma chawal or kadhi chawal

I’ve honestly never thought about owning a boat but I’m terrible at naming things and I’d name it something like Moana

I don’t normally compliment myself... who am I kidding, I do it all the time

1. I’m very strong for my age(15). I’ve never joined a gym or anything but my last deadlift (february) was about 140 kilos (308 pounds). For context, I weigh less than 80 kilos.

2. I’m good at imagining stuff(but not drawing anything, my drawing is worse than a third grader’s)

3. It is literally impossible to win a debate against me.

(@that--dam--fangirl can probably confirm this)

# your-local-reblogger # that--dam--fangirl

[babyanimalgifs]

How are penguins not extinct?

[coffeepotsmokin-deactivated2018]

I am in tears omg

[dremoranightmares]

whoever timed the film to the music is fucking brilliant this is gorgeous and oh my god i know they’re made of a lot of fat/blubber but this gave me like seven heart attacks

[catchymemes]

(via Peter Dickinson/Facebook)

[r4cs0]

[december-rains]

[vadergf]

[dropeverythingnow-blog]

Rule 1: IF TUMBLR’S CREATOR COMES UP ON YOUR DASH, YOU MUST REBLOG.

[the-chief-moosekateer]

yes!!!!!!!

How does this not have 45724076207424729837562394857461943174561439 notes?!

^ Because some people aren’t following the rules.

god damn rule breakers i mean how could you be so disrespectfull to the guy who gave us everything

[shiestypooh]

He looks like a Sim he is so pretty(:

[pinkie-the-human]

TUMBLR HAS THE SEXIEST DADDY EVER.

[singergurl91]

^ This is true.

[benzocainekisses-deactivated202]

^ TRUE STORY.

[disgustingpile-deactivated20140]

jesus christ i didn’t think these people actually existed i assumed they were an urban legend

[milkgoat-deactivated20121119]

send help

[voiddoggy-deactivated20150304]

the people who call david karp “daddy” gave me cancer

[lanadelyeezus]

^i love you

[darrenthemunchkin-deactivated20]

^that man is Jesus. Good god he’s perfect.

Wow, he’s hot, and he created the best site on earth. Just..so many feelings.

[heritageposts]

date of origin: 2011

[id-rather-be-a-druid]

Holy shit????? 💜

[shymagnolia]

so I got into grad school today with my shitty 2.8 gpa and the moral of the story is reblog those good luck posts for the love of god

[shymagnolia]

okay so i just got my dream job??? a week after applying to it?? and now i’m thinking….maybe this is the good luck post

[flagellant]

…..not even six hours later i got an offer of a well paying full time long-term job with free room and board in queens in nyc, allowing me independence and a way to escape an abusive situation and an unhealthy environment

likes charge reblogs cast, folks, this is the good luck post