Fuck The Magicians

| jane / Q | 26 | lesbian | agender | it/she | ✨️profile picture by sherbertufo✨️

[ladybugpill0wpet]

in my head bj and hawkeye are both named benjamin, in the same way trixie and katya are both named brian

[folkloregirlfriend]

one time i tagged a post with #perv instead of #prev by mistake and the op of that post blocked me

[so-you-read-the-usernames]

Bad Red Hood Comic: I’m a lone wolf. I don’t fit in and I don’t want to fit in. No one can know the dark corners of my mind

Good Red Hood Comic: I am going arrange the most bizarre and elaborate situation so I can monologue my inner most feelings to someone

[ninicure]

dont be sad. cherry robins bouncing on mama boobs, ok?

[making-you-in-mtg]

[sapphic-machine]

This is like lingerie for electronics

[punkrorschach]

rapid fire things i learned about my boyfriend this morning.

he has never seen disney's the little mermaid

he thought the song Poor Unfortunate Souls was from phantom of the opera

he has never seen phantom of the opera

he thought disney made phantom of the opera

he thought phantom of the opera was animated

"i couldve sworn i saw an animated hunchback"

...wait do you mean the hunchback of notre dame

he thought phantom of the opera was the hunchback of notre dame

[1five1two]

[kordyceps]

I've been back on this hellsite (affectionate) for nearly two weeks now and realized I have not seen a single piece of fanart featuring Grace in his obscene adorable lil EVA undersuit and so ofc had to rectify this injustice immediately.

[lemonlimestar]

bad superboy comic: i’m scared my EVIL GENES are kicking in and then i’ll DESTROY everyone that i LOVE and i won’t even regret it afterward because i don’t have a SOUL….……

good superboy comic: i have no real autonomy and my entire existence was born of tragedy. maybe one day i’ll die too and fulfill my purpose in a way that i can never do as superboy. i’m a product before i’m a person. i can’t remember the last time there wasn’t a camera shoved in my face. every adult that is active is my life only exploits me, but i’d keel over before asking for help from someone who actually cares. i’ll never rid my conscious of the fact i believed her and she killed that man… wanted me to kill for her… also a little girl said i’m not her favorite superhero and i took personal offense to that

[radioactive-earthshine]

KonBart to me is definitely a ship that I can see them falling for each other at any time in their lifetimes and it leading to marriage, there is longevity in their relationship - they really are till death do they part, and even then, no.

[kalelraejepsen-deactivated20231]

oh my god you guys i just realized matt reeves robin would probably wear smeary eyeliner under his mask to blend his eyes in with it too

like these bitches get back to the batcave and bruce takes off his cowl and stomps in his stompy dyke boots over to the batcomputer to take notes with his hair looking absolutely fucked up, and dick pulls off his mask and backflips over to his side, similarly raccoon-eyed but otherwise adorable and immaculate in his red and yellow costume, and he tugs on bruce's cape like "hey b?? i'm kinda hungry, could you please make me a snack? 🥺"

twenty minutes later alfred smells something burning so he goes down to the kitchen and jumps out of his skin when the batbadook and his little babydook both turn to him at the exact same time and stare at him while bruce's attempt at a grilled cheese continues to burn

[lavenderprose]

Shane also needs to interact with other gay men just to understand how truly lucky he is. He needs to hear someone go off about going on Grindr to find a top for the night and then finding out that all of the guys who have the 'Hung' tag on their profile are packing like five and a half inches at MOST and then Shane has to be like "Oh that. Yeah that sounds rough." Meanwhile he lost his anal virginity to a knockout with model looks who works out for a living and started their relationship by jerking his enormous hog at him in a communal shower which has always been one of Shane's top five fantasies. And he's literally never had to be on The Apps because he's the bottom of all time actually and the DomTop with the enormous dick imprinted on him like a fucking duckling the first time Shane came untouched under him which was, I cannot stress this enough, when he LOST HIS VIRGINITY.

Like shut the fuck up Shane Hollander how does it feel to be the chosen one. He has to confront all of this because he needs to know that he has, once again, won at life in every meaningful way. And then he can sit there like :] while that sad bottom over there bemoans the Grindr biome.

[pillowspace]

Nearly blocked someone for a vaguely annoying reply they made in 2017 then remembered 2017 was 9 years ago. They will live. We can change *opens their blog* nevermind they got worse. Guards

[pillowspace]

This was written out in real time btw. I typed out the first half, paused, saved it to my drafts, went back to open their blog, then came back to type the rest

[things-strange]

Listen. Nancy is great but the way she was constantly ruining Jonathan’s photos by opening the dark room despite it being not only his passion but his JOB? You can’t tell me she gave a single shit about ANY of Steve’s interests or what he thought was important. But the way Steve was going to dinners with Barbs family? Yeah, that boy definitely gave up A LOT during his relationship with Nancy and it kinda fucked him up. He figured he must not have given up enough.

So when Steve and Eddie start dating? Eddie having previously been so vocal about hating everything Steve liked? Yeah, Steve starts shoving himself into a box and it takes a distressingly long time for Eddie to realize he’s not actually ‘expanding Steve’s horizons’ or whatever he thinks is going on

[i-draws-dinosaurs]

The beautiful and endangered Dumb Gulper Shark

[i-draws-dinosaurs]

[toweringclam]

Psych was correct. When you're 100% sure of your conclusion, but it's based off of evidence that only you can see (because it's obscure, easily dismissed, or requires a lot of prior context), it's genuinely better to just say "I had a psychic vision" or something like that. People are more willing to believe you have mystical powers than that they just missed something you found obvious.