malevolent local idgit

Just here for shrimps

[eroscestlavie]

everyone envies me for my Mateo Point

[slimegirlwarlock]

[you-just-got-wormed]

all i want is a super hero story where the villain is monologuing and the hero doesnt interrupt!!! like the villain is going on and on but when he looks at the hero, expecting them to have escaped or fallen asleep or some rude gag, he sees the hero listening intently, asking him to go on and telling him that its fascinating. and so this happens every time the villain captures the hero, he does his monologue and the hero actually pays attention!! and so the villain starts actually just telling the hero why hes a villain, whatever drove him to do this, he just talks. and the hero listens. and they become friends, they work through the villains issues and reintroduce himto normal life and its pure!! and nice!!! and i just want villains working through their shit with the hero yknow?? if you know any examples of something like this tell me because i l i ve for it

tldr: hero listens to villain’s monologue because its interesting!! and he put time into it!!! eventual trust and friendship

[vincennesdimanche]

[utopians]

duuuuuude you have GOT to come out tonight we're enacting cruelty upon those who have transgressed so badly that we can justify any act against them... and you KNOW we're interpreting our delight as moral righteousness... Yeah it's fucking crazyyyyyyy get an Uber

[childsacrifice]

(no beers in) So how do you perceive me in the privacy of your thoughts

[schnellergeist]

watchin a sasquatch doc n this guy just randomly plays the drums throughout the show

[schnellergeist]

oh he just explained he plays the drums to attract bigfoot. reasonable

[schnellergeist]

this guy: (kickass drum solo)

bigfoot: (shows up) whoa man sick!!!!!!!!!

[raccoonmilf]

When I was in grade school I used to send emails to biologists and zoologists asking them questions to get answers to include in school projects I was working on, and would cry when they did not respond because I thought I was stupid for thinking that some random kid would ever be deserving of a response from someone who does something as smart and cool and important as *checks notes* studies frog fungus.

Now, at 29, I’m lowkey having a panic attack because my academic email is filled with middle schoolers wanting me to answer their questions about pygmy raccoons and I keep putting off answering them because I’m so overwhelmed with all the other raccoon stuff I have to do.

Anyway, greatest apologies to any scientist I ever emailed as a child and also an adult.

[raccoonmilf]

I know your research is really important and I appreciate all you are doing but this is so fucking funny

[assiraphales]

ok so apparently in celebration of the 250th anniversary of paul revere’s ride this was projected onto a church in boston??

[xiaq]

“A church”?? That’s Old North Church! That’s THE church where the lanterns were lit.

[homeboygirl]

my evil chalice came in but its so fucking small. goddamnit. they're going to make fun of me at the wizards circle tonight

[copycatgirl36]

loser

[homeboygirl]

FUUUUUUUCK !!

[helenvaughans]

[zitasaurusrex]

[cannibalchicken]

[damnbluewires]

completely enamoured with this beast

[txttletale]

at some point it became a very common talking point that science fiction and fantasy ought to Represent Trans People and that exploring Weird Gender Shit without also depicting characters who are legibly transgender in Normal Ways is passé. and honestlyyyy i don't care give me a hundred more male characters possessed by female ghosts or nonbinary robots or whatever. literally what is the point of the scifi fantasy genre if you cannot connect to the fantastical

[txttletale]

if i wanted to read about people being transgender without a wizard being involved i would open my tumblr dash. Representation will kill the reader she needs a guy who accidentally downloaded the memories of a woman on the CyberLine and can't tell them apart from his own to live

[memingursa-deactivated20250625]

Italian Nirvana

[memingursa-deactivated20250625]

[dappermouth]

anytime someone from the UK orders a print from me I’m delighted because the addresses tend to be charming and sound completely made-up, I just suspend my disbelief and accept that I’m sending a package someplace with a name like Bristleberry House at Ditchmallow in Brambleford-on-Cotton—incredible lmaooo I bet this gets delivered to you by a badger in a little coat

[normal-horoscopes]

I MAILED SOME COPIES OF MY BOOK TO ENGLAND AND IT COST ME AN EXTRA THREE DOLLARS TO PAY THE GROUP OF VOLES IN BELLHOP UNIFORMS THAT MANAGE THEIR SHIPPING

[assiraphales]

anyways (I say this as someone who is deeply critical of the united states government, military, unchecked capitalism, police, etc) I am SICK of people treating america as if it has no cultural value or positives so….. I love u 85 million acres (bigger than italy) of national parks. I love u harlem renaissance. I love u groundhogs day. I love u sweet tea and fried chicken and jambalaya. I love u apple cider donuts and maizes on crisp autumn days. I love u 95k miles of coastlines and new england fisherman and hand knitted sweaters. I love u halloween where millions of people dress up and give candy to strangers and carve jack o’lanterns. I love u small talk and small towns and potlucks and bringing over casseroles to your struggling neighbors. I love u cowboys and ranch hands and arizonian cactus. I love u appalachian trail and dirtbikes and divebars. I love u sparklers and fireflies. I love u mark twain and toni morrison and emily dickinson and henry david thoreau. I love u rock n roll i love u bluegrass and hippies i love u jimi hendrix and nirvana and CCR and janis joplin. I love u victorian houses and jonny appleseed and john henry and mothman and bigfoot. I love u foggy days in the pacific northwest and neon signs and roadside attractions. I love u baseball and 1950s diners and soft serve. I love u native american art and pop art and poptarts. I love u blue jeans and barbecues and jazz musicians 

[assiraphales]

I would genuinely love to hear what a resident of china or russia loves about their home bc I’m not a fucking bigot and I know a government doesn’t define a culture but thanks for ur exposing yourself babe xoxo

[fairycosmos]

you literally have to unironically listen to some shit like party rock anthem so you don’t kill yourself

[cursedpossums]

unrestrained summer fun

[cursedpossums]

every year around late may, without fail, this post starts getting notes again . and my little wet raw chicken breast of a brain gets puzzled. because i forget that summer is , in fact. a yearly event