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my YT recomendation just made something

#anime #degenerate #monogatari #pmseymourva

lamafeeling

Some of y’all really think racism in America looks like this:

When it really looks like this

lamafeeling

You are not exempt from racism just because your country’s version is not the same as ours

molothoo

Oh def reblogging this version

niqhtlord01

Humans are weird: Historical figures

Alien: So this girl claims to hear the voice of god and then leads an army of her countrymen? Human: Pretty much, yeah. Alien: Do you always let people who claim to hear voices in their head into positions of power? Human: To be fair they were French and they have never been all there to begin with. ———————————————————————————————————-

Alien: So this man was poisoned? Human: With cyanide laced tea, pastries, and wine; but that didn’t work. Alien: And that was then they shot him? Human: Point blank in the chest; still didn’t work and he jumped up some time later and attacked them. Alien: But then he was shot several more times, yes? Human: Correct. Alien: And then he died? Human: No. Alien: No? Human: They dumped his body into a freezing river and when they found it the next day they found that he had been trying to claw his way through the ice but died from either drowning or hypothermia. Alien: By the gods! Alien: What kind of man was he to endure so much?!? Human: He was Russian. Human: Their idea of fun is putting a loaded gun to their head and pulling the trigger to see if they die. ———————————————————————————————————-

Alien: This Greek speakers works are truly amazing! Alien: How did he become so good? Human: He shaved off half of his head. Alien: ……… Alien: What? Human: He figured he would be too embarrassed to go outside looking like that so he was then forced to stay home and work. Alien: ……. Alien: What?! ———————————————————————————————————-

Alien: These ancient portraits are astounding.| Human: Also fake, but glad you enjoy them. Alien: How are they fake? Human: Well for starters this guy had an overbite jaw so big he could have been used to open beer bottle and hips so wide he needed a walking stick to keep himself upright. Alien: If this is true why did they not paint him properly? Human: Royal blood families tend to downplay how much incest they had going on. Alien: Could you run that by me one more time? ———————————————————————————————————-

Alien: So this man can reincarnate himself spiritually? Human: Yeah, but he said he wouldn’t do it anymore so he actually died. Alien: Can he do that? Human: Don’t think we had spiritual cops to tell him otherwise. ———————————————————————————————————-

Alien: This leader had his predecessors body dug up and put on trial? Human: He REALLY didn’t like the guy when he had been alive. Alien: How does that make any sense?! Human: Makes perfect sense to a man of the cloth. ———————————————————————————————————-

Alien: This man was nothing but a bloated tyrant. Human: History says officials threw his dead body on to the street and set it on fire. Alien: A fitting end for such a monster. Human: More like a fire hazard. Human: Legend says he was so fat and oily his body burned for three days straight. ———————————————————————————————————-

Alien: If this man was so important why did they name a salad after him? Human: Because to make it you need to slice it up with sharp knives. Alien: I still don’t see t- Alien: …….. Alien: Oh. ———————————————————————————————————-

Alien: Why does this man wear a pipe on his head? Human: He needed a place to hide his speeches. ———————————————————————————————————-

Alien: How could such a tiny man be desirable to your kind? Human: He basically conquered all of mainland Europe. Human: So he was big where it counted. ———————————————————————————————————

Alien: This one doesn’t seem so bad. Human: He would literally drive a wooden stake from your ass and out your mouth. Alien: Jokes on him then, because I don’t even have an ass. Human: You also don’t have pants but that’s a discussion for another time. ———————————————————————————————————-

hype

strangesigils

This was the first method of sigil making I ever learned, from a post by @the-darkest-of-lights. I decided to make my own tutorial on it with my spare time. Happy sigil making! I’ll be making more of these on other methods of sigil making I think, because there’s so many different methods, and this was quite enjoyable to make. (I know that you can make sigils with the other various planetary numerology squares but honestly I still haven’t figured out how, I only know this one.)

mystic-morrwin

Gosh this method of sigil making looks like a bunch of fun!

taste-of-ink-deactivated2020071

humans inviting aliens to visit earth after a long mission and aliens being really excited to go and see the infamous planet that led to the development of such universally renown species but get one look at the ocean and are just. what the fuck is that.

and humans are like oh yeah we don’t fuck with that

and aliens are like you literally hop galaxies with little to no understanding of what you’ll find but you won’t venture into your own aquatic abyss?

and humans simply say scan it

five kicks later and aliens say fuck that fuck that fuck that what the fuck how are you all alive let’s go back to the black holes

lets-nuke-it-from-orbit

With us part of the greater galactic community, I can’t decide if it’s funnier that we went to space and just collectively decided to never explore the oceans, or if Cthulu actually lives down there and we’re all just ignoring it until it becomes a problem.

lolme5h17

we space travel not because we can, but because we need to

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

a mimic monster that masquerades as a simple street light. you are walking home alone at night. you hear footsteps behind you, echoing in the dark. you start to run. nowhere is safe; the darkness swarms around you, cloaking myths and monsters. finally, you see a light up ahead. one glowing beacon in a sea of terror. you run faster and faster, your lungs nearly giving out, until finally, finally, you stop to rest in an island, a haven: the flickering safety of a street light.

then it opens its mouth

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

REBLOGGING THIS @ 2AM JUST BC I FUCKIN CAN

prokopetz

I’ve seen a lot of videos going around of urban-dwelling critters coming to humans for help with various problems, ranging from boxes stuck on their heads to young trapped down a storm drain, and it’s gotten me to thinking:

On the one hand, it’s kind of fascinating that they know to do that.

On the other hand, setting any questions of how this sort of behaviour must have arisen aside for the nonce, does it ever strike you how weird it is that we’ve got a whole collection of prey species whose basic problem-solving script ends with the step “if all else fails, go bother one of the local apex predators and maybe they’ll fix the problem for no reason”?

roachpatrol

well, come to think of it, we’re at the top of the food chain but we almost exclusively hunt and kill prey out in the country.

raccoons and possums and foxes and crows all succeed in an urban environment because they’re opportunistic and observant. and almost none of them would have observed us pounce on one of their species and then start eating it, you know? a lot of them would have observed that we scream and chase them out of wherever we don’t want them to be, but other animals are territorial too. but there’s a number of situations where humans feed whoever’s bold enough to take them up on the offer, and we do tend to pull garbage off of other animals as soon as they slow down enough for us to catch. ‘a human got me but nothing bad happened’ is a much more frequent thing than ‘a human got me and tried to eat me’.

anyway like, we’re masters of our environment, we make weird shit happen all the time, we have lots of great food and sometimes we share, and we almost never eat someone. it makes sense for urban animals, over the last century or so, to just keep an eye out for opportunities to use us, and to pass the habit on to their kids.

tsfennec

It really is a weird, funny thing. Like yeah, technically they’re predators, and they get pretty screamy, especially if you try to take any of their stuff… but given the chance it seems like they’d rather help us out and sometimes they’ll just randomly give you food, so???

I mean, I guess in fairytales and myths we’ve got our fair share of stories about dangerous people/creatures who might well kill you or otherwise ruin your life, but to whom people nonetheless turn for help in desperate circumstances. So it’s not like the perspective is exactly a foreign thing to our own mindset, really… It’s just that, y’know, we can’t actually go make a deal with the faeries when there’s something we can’t figure out.

(Which brings me to an interesting thought about the ubiquitous rule about never eating the faery food lest you find yourself forever unsatisfied with anything in the human world - and the potential parallels to the dangers of feeding wildlife human food lest they become addicted and too tame and dependent to be safe for either themselves or us. Hmm.)

absurdistocchiolism

Okay, but that last bit with the Fae…makes almost perfect sense.

Of the stories I’ve read, the food of the Fae, its origins and effects, are often strange and/or obscure.- Just like our food to most animals.

The Fae are strange beings that seem to know weird things that give them power or an edge over us.- Just like us to animals.

The Fae work and live by strange rules also often nonsensical or obscure to us.- Just like us to animals.

The Fae can easily obtain vast amounts of things we consider rare/precious/desireable, and have no problem with dishing it out wantonly for no other reason than amusement.- Just like us to animals.

The Fae sometimes are amused by having us around, but only on their terms and IF it amuses/intrigues them.- Just like us to animals.

GUYS, I SENSE A PATTERN….

roachpatrol

-they have arcane social conventions and the punishment for not paying the correct respects right is banishment, if you’re lucky, and death if you’re not.

-they have wild and unexpected parties where you’d least expect to find them, but if you’re bold enough to entertain them they’ll feed you and caress you and play with you all night.

-time runs strangely in their realm. their homes are summerlands: warm and bright, no matter the season. there is always fruit on their tables. but not everyone who comes in from the cold is let back out again.

-their games are cruel and complex and unfair, but if you can beat them by their own rules you will access riches beyond imagining.

-sometimes they just fucking fuck with you, the fuckheads.

-they will absolutely steal your children away. when your children return— if they ever do— they will come back strange. they will know things they shouldn’t. they won’t know things that they should. your strange children might survive, might even prosper, might take wives and husbands and have children of their own. but they will always be marked by their time away from your world.

-the price for pissing them off is always death. sometimes just you. sometimes your whole community.

-if you are very good, and very smart, and very brave, they will grant your wish.

oceaxe-ifdawn

My eyes just got wider and wider the further down I read.

araniaart

OH! Reblogging because this ties in very well with the tumblr post about how Dogs might see us as elves

bumblebeeappletree

So. You want to garden.

For whatever reason. Right now as of uhhhh Friday March 27, of 2020, within the quarantine of COVID-19 you are most likely want to garden in order to feed your family as you want to save money from the grocery store. And to ya know. feed your family.

SO. Here’s some YouTube videos. Mainly from this one YouTuber since she runs her own farm. She talks about what to grow and how to grow as well as saving seeds. (Trust me, saving seeds is better in the long run.) You can also regrow kitchen scraps too if you feel like you’re unable to get any proper seeds. And for fun have a post apocalyptic type garden.

What to plant in a small garden:

Fast-food growing options:

The importance of Seed saving:

How to build an arched trellis for $30:

A complete guide to virtual gardening:

How to PLANT & GROW with cattle panel arched trellises:

14 store bought vegetables & herbs you can regrow:

Save your kitchen scraps, these 7 plants can be grown out of them:

9 survival gardening crops to grow in a post apocalyptic world:

beben-eleben

For future reference.

mollimassacre-deactivated201408

Thank you.

fuckyeahifightlikeagirl

For those who would ever need it. -C

rapeculturerealities

reblogging here because i can see this being relevant to anyone who’s ever tried to get out of an abusive relationship

directorlazard-deactivated20171

Reblogging because that last comment made me reread the whole thing in a new light and realize this could be vital information. So, putting it out there for everyone, and hoping no one ever really needs it.

ghostlysea

aww nasa has a page for space technology terms you can use in science fiction

nerds

ceruleancynic

THIS IS THE BEST THING

AAAAAAHHH

cutting-you-off-deactivated2020

Holy crap!!

dantedevereaux-deactivated20201

For all my writers struggling with weaponry of the sword variety.

writing-prompt-s

This is such a great resource! Thank you!

disappointingcake

Humans are unstoppable...Until they aren’t.

I’m not the most eloquent writer, but I’ve had this idea kicking around for a while and figured I’d put it out into the universe.

A lot of the basis for the “humans are space orcs” stuff is the idea that we’re pretty durable compared to many species, yeah? When it comes to physical trauma, we can bounce back from most things that don’t kill us outright, especially given the benefit of hypothetical space-age technology, and adrenaline is one heck of a drug when it comes to functioning under stress.

But that doesn’t make us unkillable, and even though we can survive debilitating injuries and not die from shock, it doesn’t mean it’s fun. Dying of shock sucks, but at least it’s probably quick.

So - Imagine a ship, adrift in space, slowly being drawn into a star or something. In order to save the ship, someone has to repair the hyper-quantum-relay-majig on the hull or in the engine or whatever. Bit of a problem though- there’s a ton of deadly, deadly radiation (Wrath of Khan style) or poisonous fumes or, I dunno, electrical current, between the crew and the repair. Like, enough to kill most species instantly, so the crew is just like, ‘welp, guess we’ll die then’. But then.

BUT THEN

They ask the human. Because everyone’s heard the stories - you’re basically unkillable, right? Could you survive long enough in there to fix it? And their human goes real quiet for a second, but still says ‘Yeah, I could fix it’. And the rest of the crew is like, ‘Whaaaaaa, it won’t kill you?’ and the human repeats “I can fix it” (which isn’t an answer, but no one catches that, not yet at least), so they send ‘em in. And the human fixes it, they come back, the ship flies to safety, and the crew is thrilled to survive. If the human is a little quiet, well, they’re entitled after pulling off a miracle. Everyone else is just excited to get to the nearest station’s bar to tell their very own human story, cuz, ‘those crazy humans, amiright?’.

The good mood keeps up until the human is late for their next shift. At first it’s just faint unease, but- but they earned a bit of a lie-in, right? No reason to begrudge them some extra rest, even if it is a little weird for them to oversleep. They’ll be fine. Humans are always fine.

(Right?)

(…Wrong.)

- What is… help. Help!-

- ake up! You have t-

- been days. You need sleep, you-

- nother transfusion. We could-

- out of sedatives!-

A week later, the crew finally reaches the station. They stumble into the bar, haggard and haunted. And over the next months and years a new rumor about humans starts to make its way through space. A rumor unlike any before.

‘Be careful with your humans’ it whispers. ‘Their strength is not always a blessing. Be sure they don’t do something they can’t come back from, because when a human dies… they die slowly.’