Not Dead Yet

I'm Harlee. I'm 19 and use this blog to take my mind off my disabilities. If you are curious, you're in luck because I overshare. My diagnoses are RDEB, IgA Nephropathy, anemia of CKD, anxiety, and depression. I have been through more in 19 years than some people do in 50. Therefore I am opinionated and have an amazing BS filter. Anyway, don't ask if you can follow, I really don't care about that. (Yes, I was once a 1d blog.)

[tokidokifish]

the concept of yelling at employees is so alien to me, like a retail worker could fucking stab me and id probably still thank them for their time

[cgkcjkelfjsmsjj-deactivated2021]

wow harry, you just had to go and one-up your sister, didn’t you?

“Who is the favorite child now?” Harry chants as he hits enter.

“Harry is the favorite child.” He whispers gleefully in reply to himself.

[princeanderfels]

Fuck everyone who falsely tries to have a service dog and fuck people who think that some how I don’t know what the fuck I’m talking about when it comes to service dogs.

This happens EVERY TIME I make a Facebook status complaining about discrimination. Without fail I have to cite the ADA website because some one tries to tell me what’s what about having a service dog.

Blue and Green gave helpful shit to my situation (They were not the only ones, either, but they were surrounding this one ass hat.

I just get SO FRUSTRATED with people thinking they know more than me about this shiiiiit.

Or people straight up telling me they got a vest for their pet so they can fake it?? The levels of rage I have building within my soul are unparalleled.

Anyway. I needed to rant. Feel free to commiserate.

[stand-up-gifs]

He’s just mad because he can’t acquire all the apple juice that I’m acquiring. (x)

[everybodyvanishes-deactivated20]

“what disorder of mine does this symptom belong to?” a novel by me

[louistomlinharry]

Them: The middle class white man is the most discriminated against class in this country

Me, internally: Do you see me sitting here in this wheelchair? Could you take two seconds to think before you release the word vomit? Have you met anyone who isn't white?

Me, externally: As a disabled woman, I have to stop you right there.

[sunflower-cane]

if youre abled/neurotypical and actually get offended when someone calls you abled/neurotypical because you somehow think its just better for them to just call you normal, you really gotta open your eyes.

this isnt about abled people being labeled, it isnt an insult to be called abled, this is about fighting the ableist ideology that abled is the norm, because this ideology makes disabled people out to be abnormal/weird/freaks and gives an excuse for many to discriminate against disabled people because “theyre not normal like us”.

when we call you abled instead of “normal” we are not saying abled people arent normal, we are saying disabled people are normal too, that we are not weird or freaks just because we are different, we are saying there is different types of normal.

if you actually get offended at the idea of disabled people being seen as normal, of the word not being used to discriminate against the disabled but instead being used to include them, youre the offensive one man.

[louistomlinharry]

Positivity posts: You can do anything you set your mind to! Go out there and do it!!

My disabled ass: Can't relate

[talesfrom]

TalesFromThePharmacy: Thank You For Everything You Do

I don’t work in pharmacy so if my post isn’t allowed here please feel free to remove it. :)

I just want to thank all you pharmacists and techs for everything you do. As a chronic pain patient, I would be totally screwed without you guys. I had a pharmacist go the extra mile for me this weekend. I ran out of gabapentin and needed refills, but unfortunately it was Friday night and we couldn’t reach my doctor. My original prescription had been written wrong by the doc and had too high a # of pills for the month, so my pharmacist gave me the 24 pills left on the Rx to get me through until we could contact my Dr. She had no obligation to do this for me, but without her kindness I wouldn’t have been able to make it to work this weekend (I have a flare-up kicking my butt right now) and it reminded me of just how hard you all work to do your best for your patients, and how under appreciated it is. So thank you to all of you for your hard work that keeps so many people functioning, I and I’m sure many other people (even if they don’t say it) are so grateful for it. :)

By: broccolichefdad

[onlytwitterpics]

[brakehagen-deactivated20161009]

do u ever start typing out a long opinion post and feel very heated and then halfway through realize nothing matters and time is a flat circle and whatever i’m tired

[hoscakaliiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnn-dea]

[tiddiebaby-deactivated20210816]

the gang’s all here

[livebloggingmydescentintomadness]

If there is a will there IS a way. U may not be able to do it the same way that non disabled people can, but you still can do it

I used to think that way too, before I got sick. I used to think that if I was just stubborn enough - and I’m really stubborn - then “where there’s a will there’s a way” and somehow I could do whatever I set my mind to.

But it’s simply a fact of reality that this isn’t true. It’s not being “negative” to acknowledge reality, to acknowledge that having a disability limits my abilities. That’s literally what it means. A Deaf person can’t hear, a blind person can’t see, a paralyzed person can’t walk, an autistic person can’t be allistic, and I can’t live the life of a healthy person. That’s not me giving up, that’s me acknowledging reality.

My illness prevents me from doing many of the things I want to do. I don’t “let” it stop me, it just stops me. If I tried to “find a way” to live like a healthy person, I would get so sick that I would collapse. Positive thoughts don’t make my pain and fatigue go away, it doesn’t allow me to think clearly or have the strength to leave the house more often. 

I know this is hard to accept, but there is nothing I can do to change this.

I do what I can to improve my health, I test my boundaries to see if I can do more than I think I can do, and I keep trying every single day. But a strong will can’t change a weak body. Wishing and wanting and trying can’t stop the bacteria that are ravaging and polluting my body, it can’t stop my immune system from attacking my organs, it can’t solve the mystery illnesses of fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome. If the disease kills me, it won’t be because I didn’t try hard enough.

Believe me, if wanting to be healthy made you healthy, I’d be the healthiest fucking person alive. If wanting to be abled made you abled, we would be abled. 

But a good attitude simply can’t fix a broken meat suit, and you healthy and abled people need to accept that too. 

You think you’re helping by telling me I can accomplish whatever I set my mind to, but you need to stop mindlessly pushing that ableist concept and realize that I don’t HAVE to be able to do whatever I set my mind to in order to be a worthwhile person. I don’t HAVE to “find a way” to be good enough. I AM good enough even though I can’t do the same things as healthy, abled people. 

I am disabled, and I am good enough.

[heyatleastitsnotcancer]

New rule: if you respond “at least you don’t have” or “at least you have” when we’re talking or what not I’m just not going to respond. I obviously don’t mind if you respond and say “I understand. I struggle with this too” or something similar. That makes sense.

But I am so beyond tired of the struggling Olympics and the constant competition out of chronic illness and struggling people have been making on here. We shouldn’t be in competition with one another for who has it worse. That’s not support.

We should allowed to talk about what we’re struggling with without being dismissed or feeling like we don’t have it “bad enough” because someone else may have it worse.

We need to stop this behavior. I will no longer be responding to anyone who engages in this for my own well being.

[heyatleastitsnotcancer]

…..well yeah that’s the whole reason of the name. It’s a joke on how people do this. Constantly when you’re chronically ill or disabled you hear at least it’s not x. It’s a running joke in the community and that’s what the name references.

[celceta]

me: debit or credit?

customer: yeah

[celceta]

[celceta]

Honestly fuck this post I was thinking about it all day at work and I asked the customer crebit or dedit and I looked like a damn fool

[cheaphalloweencostume]

when I was 16 or so I was a real big anti SJW shithead and as a result of that I had a falling out with someone who I previously considered a dear friend, it was entirely my fault and pretty recently I decided to look them up and maybe apologize and see how they’re doing… apparently they’re drawing Malcolm in the Middle incest now and sometimes god burns bridges for your own good

[heyatleastitsnotcancer]

Okay if someone is heat intolerant and they’re really upset and miserable because they’re outside or without air conditioning when it’s really hot they’re not “having a fit” or being a baby. The heat is making them violently ill and putting them in danger. It’s a dangerous health concern and you’re a huge dick if you’re minimizing that and laughing at them.