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i make art about mental health and nature and whatever inspires me i make nsfw content, but don't post it here i do take commissions right now. send private message if that's what you're looking for :) you can buy my designs here: https://www.redbubble.com/people/LucilleErebus/shop?asc=u

[lucilleerebus]

mama and baby opossum with cinquefoil

commission info sketch of an illustration I made for a book. I chose cinqfoil because they one of my husband's favorite plants, so they make me happy. it's like a wild strawberry 🍓 

[lucilleerebus]

quick selfie portrait that I did for a reddit user

[lucilleerebus]

caterpillar crawling up juniper branch

[lucilleerebus]

little succulent sprites I painted

[lucilleerebus]

working on a commission piece for someone who just lost one of their cats. this isn't the finished piece, just testing out the textures and playing around.

[lucilleerebus]

little jumping spider :)

[lucilleerebus]

magpie: this was another part of the series representing moods and states. the magpie illustration was my personal favorite from the series, maybe because it was bright and fun to make, but it also represents euphoria. I was creating my personal representation of a state that I love in the present and sometimes hate in the past. this state can lead to delusions and sometimes even hallucinations for me, but it feels great. It feels like I'm doing everything right, like everyone loves me, like I'm the kindest and most empathetic and knowledgeable person in the world. I feel like I can do anything in this state. It's addicting and it makes it more challenging to take care of my mental health and do the things that I should do (sleeping, eating, regulating) because I know that the "healthy" things take away my euphoria. And often, the alternative to these states where I feel good is depression. Taking care of myself gets challenging when I know that it will not feel better. I feel my best in this state, but it has its consequences and risks and this art piece was helping me keep that in mind. The states do not exist separately from each other. I do not get to pick the euphoria that comes with mania, but leave the irritability behind. If I choose to encourage the euphoria, I am making a selfish choice. I am choosing to be a more irritated and dysregulated mother, partner, and friend. 

owl: I painted this owl in a series of four animals representing different emotional and mood states. the animals represented euphoria, irritability, depression, and motivation/productivity. the owl represented the motivated mood. I guess the inspiration was because i forget to sleep when i am in my productive mindset, but i still always feel alert and excited. this is the one piece of my manic states that i find the hardest to let go of. i create most of my art in the middle of the night and the joy I get from the creativity can make it hard to remember the negative impacts of sleeplessness and the other harmful aspects of the elevated state.

[lucilleerebus]

this is a plumeria flower. they're cool and tropical. i created this one with watercolor and colored pencil. it is available to buy (stickers etc) on redbubble.

[lucilleerebus]

this one was drawn in response to a longing that i was feeling for a support system when i was processing some disturbing things that were going on with my marriage and life at the time. my mom had just reminded me in some way that she was not there to believe and support me, so i was working through my current resources and what i could do for myself. I drew the spines in the hands because I was feeling this grief one day while dropping my son off at his preschool and I felt needle-like sensations in my hands. i don't know that it meant anything related to my emotional state, but i noticed it and thought it was interesting. the cactus in the middle, I chose because it is spineless. the hands are being harmed by spines from a different cactus. i think the cactus and the spiral towards it in this one was sort of symbolic of hope and gratitude. when i was a younger adult, i tripped on mescaline and was so overwhelmed with gratitude for the natural world. sometimes, when i am stuck in cycles of rumination and resentment, I look for that specific gratitude. i love to live in awe of our world.

[lucilleerebus]

i drew this fish when i was sort of coming out of a mental health episode. at the time, i had been experiencing a lot of irritability and resentment and desperation. i blamed myself for a lot of it because i have bipolar disorder and assumed i was just having a manic/hypomanic episode. i spent a lot of time in the yard, i was taking my anger out on the garden because much of the anger was being felt about the people around me and i was using the garden as sort of a safe outlet. i dug a huge hole in the yard and put cardboard down to kill the weeds, stacked bricks to make a path, moved dirt from the hole to the gardens. i didn't do much of it by the book, and actually a lot of it has been destroyed or moved around since then, but the purpose was not to create the garden. i wanted to turn my anger into beauty to show gratitude to the people around me. in retrospect, there were emotional needs that were not being met and i was feeling some hopelessness that was turning into the resentment and i had to actually address those issues before getting better. the garden was beautiful but it wasn't the only answer. at the time, though, i was proud of myself for showing love to people even when my body was trying to feel anger at them. after building the garden, i still had a huge hole in the backyard, so we turned it into a small backyard pool. we had a few gold fish and mosquito fish/minnows to eat the mosquito larva and we planted some moss and plants. frogs moved in and we got to hear them and see them in our yard. my toddler loved going out with me to see the goldfish and that is what inspired this drawing. 

[disabled-models]

Aariana Rose Philip, a model with cerebral palsy, for Interview.

[pink-slay]

It's so cool to see a disabled model in tilt in a powerchair. As someone who has to be in approximately 30-45 degrees of tilt (in a powerchair just like hers) just to move distances longer than 10 feet, I love seeing how it looks powerful, especially when disabled people are told their whole lives how medical everything about them is.

[dingusmysquingus]

I also love the taking up space of it, I always feel so embarrassed because I also have to tilt/recline my chair a lot to be able to get around and this photo takes a position that often feels vulnerable and reframes it as power

[briarpatch-kids]

The POWER it conveys is so good. I always feel so vulnerable when I have to tilt, recline, or have my feet up because of the space issue. Shes so unbothered, I love it!!!

[lucilleerebus]

Painted some hearts because it's my anniversary 😍

Happy Groundhog Day everyone!

(I used everclear to make the texture at the top lol)

[mephistopheles]

some of yall need to go back to like preschool level 'girls can do anything boys can do' feminism bc we are regressing into feminine = frivolous = weak = nurturing and masculine = power = force = competence at the speed of fucking light

[lucilleerebus]

I was given some free time from my sweet little ones this week and I've been painting these little guys. I feel like they need names 😆 Any suggestions?

[lucilleerebus]

Also... I'm getting a used scanner this weekend so should be able to upload some actual quality images of my art!

[lucilleerebus]

drew this little guy, sort of inspired by a line from a song by mewithoutyou: "'the parachute broke loose,' cried the goose with misplaced but understandable concern for his little brother's mental health. his happy little brother and the forgetting of himself."

a lot of times when I am struggling with my mental health, I have a hard time actually accessing the skills that I have and know. this is especially frustrating to me sometimes as someone working in the mental health field and studying counseling. sometimes, we are the goose. sometimes, we are the parachute. sometimes, we are the strings. what else are we? I wonder what those roles look like in other people's lives.

[lucilleerebus]

I’m excited to share that I’m collaborating as an illustrator on two upcoming games, and I’ve been having fun bouncing between the two different creative worlds.

Both projects are still in early development and I’ll be sharing some of that process and early artwork here. The first game is a fantasy visual novel / dungeon crawler with strong role-play elements and explicit NSFW content. It’s very much a choose-your-own-adventure experience, where player decisions shape the story and encounters. The reason I chose to collaborate with this game was the emphasis on non-judgment and body-positivity and representation in the game. We intend to include creative fantasy elements, expressive characters, and art that leans into indulgence and storytelling.

The second project is a historical horror game, potentially set in Italy during the Late Middle Ages, drawing lightly from themes of religion and politics, but mostly I love that I am able to create somewhat unsettling but playful visuals.

I’ll be posting concept art and sketches from both projects here as I’m able. I can’t wait to share more as these games continue to grow.